From: Pittston, Pennsyltucky
Let me say from the outset: If I slip up and sound like I've elected myself "Spokesman for Polyamory International", I apologize. I know I am only speaking for myself.
First off, it is terrific that you weren't as possessive as you thought you'd be. That is a huge thing in this particular lifestyle.
I want to concentrate, though on something you said about your guy:
"He was on fire last night. ive never experienced him this way. Ill admit it was painfull for me to realize how much of him i had been missing out on."
Again, I'm only speaking for myself, here.
For me, it is a relief, when I realize that I've not inadvertently damaged a young lady because she wasn't completely honest with me. Many is the times I've heard: "Well, I don't know how I'd react when ..." when, in reality, she DOES know how she's going to react, she's just hoping that:
A) I'll change
2) The "moment of truth" won't come for quite some time (and then, see "A").
I'd be willing to bet a dollar to a doughnut that what you saw was his ability to finally "exhale" a little bit and not feel like he had to walk on eggshells, anymore.
Kudos and good luck to you, young lady!
A Stone in My Shoe
Screen captures (and pissing on shadows) still RULE! Ya feel me?
"For that which I love, I will do horrible things"