How fast, is too fast? I love her.

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All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> How fast, is too fast? I love her.

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How fast, is too fast? I love her. - 11/13/2016 3:37:46 AM

Crazzycool

Posts: 1
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New male submissive here. Mistress D and I met 2 months ago. I've been into kink, but never a D/s relationship. I'm sure of it. I've fallin into love with this magnificent woman after 2 months.

She said she wanted to control my body and mind from the start of it. I thought "yeaa right"...my mind has been a mess for the last 4 years. I struggled to un-fuck myself daily (ptsd) in hopes that i could get a brief moment of clarity.

She has broken me down and started piecing me back together in weeks. I love her so much for it. I feel better than ever. I want to tell her everything that I'm feeling. Is it to soon? Will it give her to much power to fast?

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RE: How fast, is too fast? I love her. - 11/13/2016 10:27:42 AM

Rochsub2009

Posts: 2536
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We're not inside your head, so it's hard to give a good response to this one. However, having said that, I'd like to offer you 2 warnings:

1) Subs in the midst of "sub frenzy" often mistake these wonderful new feelings that they're experiencing as love. Sometimes they are, but most times they're not. Remember, love isn't a feeling. Love is a decision. It's not about how much she arouses you, or how nice it is when she says "Good boy", or how owned she makes you feel when she asks you to sleep on the floor next to her bed. IMO, love is actually about very vanilla things like shared values, chemistry, similar goals for the future, great communication/conversations, shared religion (or lack thereof), and a willingness to put your partner's needs ahead of your own, even when you aren't feeling like you like then very much at the moment.

2) You said that she is putting you back together and helping you to feel better than you have in a long time since developing PTSD. It is a very common thing for patients to fall in love with their therapists. The therapist is having a similar effect to what you described above, and the patient interprets it as love. In truth, it's not. See point #1 for some of the factors that are evidenced when love is involved.

Until you know for sure that it's real love that you're experiencing, I'd suggest going slowly. And if the relationship is strictly online and you've never actually met in real life, then I'd DEFINITELY suggest taking your time and not making any decisions until you've spent some time together face-to-face.

I hope that helps. Good luck to you.

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RE: How fast, is too fast? I love her. - 11/13/2016 2:07:57 PM

ThatDizzyChick

Posts: 5490
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quote:

Is it to soon? Will it give her to much power to fast?

Only you can answer those questions.

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Not your average bimbo.

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RE: How fast, is too fast? I love her. - 11/13/2016 6:54:41 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14414
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
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Honestly, BDSM and D/s creates strong emotional responses combined with endorphin highs. Many relationships don't make it past three months and most won't make it past 6 months. Don't confused tingly genitals with love. Take deep breath and take some time, figure out what is there past the sub fenzy.

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Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

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