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Illusion vs. Reality - Revisited


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Illusion vs. Reality - Revisited - 7/25/2006 11:11:33 AM   
Zenar


Posts: 39
Joined: 4/4/2005
Status: offline
First off I got to say I very much enjoyed kyraofMists's Illusion vs. Reality thread, a very good subject. Rather than to post to that thread I'd want to ask this as a question. What have different submisives seen masters do to help prevent being put on a pedistal. What have other masters done to prevent pening put there?

Now myself I can definately say I have been there and it felt damn good too! I can see how some may even become addicted to being way up there. However I have fallen down from there a few too many times and hopefully by now I know better. I had tried lately to show that I am human, I do make mistakes, I am not perfect. Quite the reverse I am now finding that is a damn good way of pushing a submisive away so there will definately not be any pedistal ever at all. Ok, so I swung the pendelum too far the other way, I am learning.

_____________________________

I know I am a mean evil bastard, but at least I am honest about it.
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RE: Illusion vs. Reality - Revisited - 7/25/2006 2:11:07 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
Sometimes, no matter what we do, what the sub/slave projects (as in the psychological definition) onto us will put us up on a pedestal, no matter what we want or say. Our job, in the words of Master Skip Chasey, is to be able to withstand and allow the sub/slave figure it out. Specifically, he says, "A Master is willing to stand in the middle of his slave’s projections about the Master without moving, neither supporting nor fostering the illusion, nor destroying it." This might be hard at times. I had a submissive friend fall in love with me. I knew that it was coming months in advanced and warned him that if we continued down the path he professed to want, he would and it wouldn't be requited. I gave him the choice of what experience he wanted. he chose to remain on that path and was hurt when it all came about. But, he was able to be very mature about it and saw what had happened. We are still good friends and I am blessed to have him in my life.

It's the sub/slave's job to come into the relationship with reality in mind, aware of or looking for projections they may be making. And don't forget, Masters project onto slaves, too, so it's our job to do the same for ourselves. I did some serious projection onto slave jason. It's a natural human occurrence that simply can't be stopped. But, what we can do is to be more self-aware, be willing to be compassionate with ourselves when we find it happening unconsciously, despite our best efforts and to learn from the experience.

I've not said this anywhere near as I've heard Master Skip say it, but perhaps it still has meaning.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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Ms Relationship Books
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BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to Zenar)
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RE: Illusion vs. Reality - Revisited - 7/26/2006 2:35:11 PM   
babysburnin


Posts: 421
Joined: 2/16/2006
Status: offline
I think you think too much...just be yourself and things will fall into place.  You'll never please everyone - and pretending will only worsen the situation.  There's someone who will put you on a pedestal in a healthy sense...once you are genuine.  It will draw those to you that are right for you.  (It really does work.)

_____________________________

-Babysburnin

"Love is, above all else, the gift of oneself."
- Jean Anouilh

"The highest proof of virtue is to possess boundless power without abusing it."
- Lord Macaulay

(in reply to Zenar)
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