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Does anybody else hate..... - 7/4/2017 9:15:33 AM   
Greta75


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When people ask you "How are you?"

It used to drive me crazy when my x-boss asked me that every single morning at work!

I know it's just polite and all.

But I just feel it's the most insincere question 99% of the time when people ask it.

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/4/2017 2:03:44 PM   
kiwisub22


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Eh - tell him in exquisite detail..... pretty much guarantee that after a few weeks of sore knees, cramping uteruses and broken fingernails, he'll find another phrase to use.

(in reply to Greta75)
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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/4/2017 2:06:27 PM   
WickedsDesire


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No one likes you - I pity you

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/4/2017 2:54:03 PM   
epiphiny43


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quote:

Gretta
When people ask you "How are you?"

It used to drive me crazy when my x-boss asked me that every single morning at work!

I know it's just polite and all.

But I just feel it's the most insincere question 99% of the time when people ask it.

Like so much else you don't understand, it's the context that is the message, not the words. Simply making a culturally appropriate greeting says he thinks you enough of a person to be worth the usual pleasantries. Part of his 'society'. Body language and facial expression usually go with the language to say you are enough as a person, or member of the group, to require the effort. All necessary social bonding to maintain group and friendship cohesiveness.
Conversely, if you got no eye contact, no greeting, and were otherwise ignored, that meaning might actually be received? Expecting a busy multi-tasker to come up with individually appropriate emotionally supportive questions on every unexpected meeting is to elevate yourself far beyond 'employee', to maybe Significant Other status. A bit of a conceit?

The question by a supervisor Does offer the opening to bring up important business matters requiring their immediate attention, or personal matters which will be affecting your work now, or soon. So it has business functionality as well.

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/4/2017 5:18:15 PM   
kiwisub22


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quote:

ORIGINAL: WickedsDesire

No one likes you - I pity you

That is soooo not true - my Sweetie likes me - he likes me enough to go to Baskin and Robbins and get me world class chocolate in a cup (ice cream) , on the 4th of July, when the temperature is 90 degrees and humidity is so high the condensation is on the outside of the glass. :)

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/4/2017 5:59:22 PM   
Greta75


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quote:

ORIGINAL: epiphiny43
Simply making a culturally appropriate greeting says he thinks you enough of a person to be worth the usual pleasantries.

That's pretty crazy. You mean if a boss or a friend doesn't ask you "How are you"? It means he is not thinking that you are worth?

I never ever feel less respected if someone doesn't ask me how am I doing.






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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/4/2017 6:00:32 PM   
Greta75


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quote:

ORIGINAL: kiwisub22
That is soooo not true - my Sweetie likes me

I'm sure he was referring to me.

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 12:00:39 AM   
CaptR


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

When people ask you "How are you?"

It used to drive me crazy when my x-boss asked me that every single morning at work!

I know it's just polite and all.

But I just feel it's the most insincere question 99% of the time when people ask it.



No I don't hate when someone asks. I like millions of others, use it as an opportunity to have a pleasant conversation about what's going on in my and the lives of friends, Coworkers and family. It's a normal follow up to a greeting.

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 12:13:08 AM   
Dvr22999874


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What would you prefer them to say to you Greta ? I think that most morning greetings seem to be some sort of mild enquiry after a persons health or state of mind, don't you ? Or maybe a comment on the day itself, but that gets boring very quickly too.

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 1:03:53 AM   
Edwird


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

[Does anybody else hate it] When people ask you "How are you?"


It's just a standard introduction to further normal social discourse, the latter of which you seem to not be very good at in real life.




Have a nice day.

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 1:46:43 PM   
DocStrange


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

When people ask you "How are you?"

It used to drive me crazy when my x-boss asked me that every single morning at work!

I know it's just polite and all.

But I just feel it's the most insincere question 99% of the time when people ask it.



I just get to work at 6:00 am before everyone else so I don't have to bother with all those "good mornings" and "how are you" question.

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 1:51:23 PM   
AtUrCervix


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

When people ask you "How are you?"

It used to drive me crazy when my x-boss asked me that every single morning at work!

I know it's just polite and all.

But I just feel it's the most insincere question 99% of the time when people ask it.




FUCK I HATE that when people actually express concern and care about me!!!

(in reply to Greta75)
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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 2:06:24 PM   
Spiritedsub2


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^ Yeah. That was my reaction too

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 2:49:21 PM   
AtUrCervix


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2

^ Yeah. That was my reaction too


That is just soooooo....wrong....people actually showing concern about my life.

I HATE THAT SHIT!!!

(Jeeeez....the next thing they're going to do is say something stoooopit like..."Hey man....let's go have a beer".

(What the fuck is THAT about????)

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 6:50:23 PM   
Greta75


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Dvr22999874
What would you prefer them to say to you Greta ?

Just say, "Hey!". That's it.

In my entire twenties, I shared an office with my boss. It was just me in and him in that office. Every single day, so I don't need to be asked, 'How are you?" Every single day!

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 6:51:54 PM   
Greta75


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quote:

ORIGINAL: AtUrCervix

FUCK I HATE that when people actually express concern and care about me!!!


Because asking, "How are you?" isn't caring to me. It's just an annoyingly fake greeting.

Also when a stranger ask, 'How are you?" Do you think the stranger actually gives a shit? No!

He was just doing robotic polite shit.

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 6:54:54 PM   
Greta75


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Edwird
It's just a standard introduction to further normal social discourse, the latter of which you seem to not be very good at in real life.
Have a nice day.

My x-boss was American. But in Asia. 'How are you?" is not the standard normal social discourse greeting. I can tell you that! No Asians say that to fellow Asian every morning. It's just a western thing.

We just don't show fake concern for people.

Over here, our standard greeting is, "Have you eaten?" "Have you had your (insert breakfast/lunch/dinner)?"

So if a worker was rushing to work and miss their meal. We would urge them to put down their work and send them to eat. Which is like logical, practical, and we will do something about it.

Full stomach, brains function better.

And with friends, if they say they have not eaten, then it's like, lets go get something to bite together!


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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 8:39:08 PM   
ThatDizzyChick


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quote:

ORIGINAL: kiwisub22

Eh - tell him in exquisite detail..... pretty much guarantee that after a few weeks of sore knees, cramping uteruses and broken fingernails, he'll find another phrase to use.

Yup, same here. :)

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 9:15:06 PM   
Edwird


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75
quote:

ORIGINAL: Edwird
It's just a standard introduction to further normal social discourse, the latter of which you seem to not be very good at in real life.
Have a nice day.

My x-boss was American.


That explains it.

All Americans are fake, all Asians say what they actually think at all times, no fake formalities, no holding hands together at chest and giving slight tip of head, none of that. All formalities are fake. I'm glad to hear all Asian countries have no civil formalities.

quote:

We just don't show fake concern for people. Over here, our standard greeting is, "Have you eaten?" "Have you had your (insert breakfast/lunch/dinner)?


So, is getting breakfast or lunch so difficult to attain in Asia that everybody has to ask each other about it upon every greeting? As genuine concern, not as conventional (fake) greeting? Wow.

Just think; when your own country works up to the next level of civilization, you can ask each other (not as fake formality, but from genuine concern) "Do you need any toilet paper?"






< Message edited by Edwird -- 7/5/2017 9:29:09 PM >

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RE: Does anybody else hate..... - 7/5/2017 11:10:00 PM   
Greta75


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Edwird
So, is getting breakfast or lunch so difficult to attain in Asia that everybody has to ask each other about it upon every greeting? As genuine concern, not as conventional (fake) greeting? Wow.

Most of the time, people miss their meals because of lack of time rushing their work load, over time, meeting deadlines, choosing to catch up sleep in the morning rather than spend time on breakfast. No time to eat. So as a boss, you have the power to give them time to eat during paid hours as a sign of being a caring boss.

Or like in my current company, if the boss calls for a 8am meeting, then she buys food for everybody so they can eat during the meeting and kill two birds in one stone.

Yes, it is practical caring.

Asking "How are you?" is just bullshit.

And yea, usually greeting is just saying, 'Hey', 'Hello', just a wave and a smile. That's it. No need bullshit questions.

Like usually if a friend ask me have I eaten, they might even bring food to me if I have not. Especially if they are meeting me late after work. And they got off earlier.

It's like, more sincere. The whole dynamic of it.

It makes me wonder if it's also western culture for married couples to ask each other, "How are you?" As a greeting EVERY SINGLE DAY when they wake up and come home from work! Like OMFG! That would drive me mad.

Over here, we do ask our spouse if they have eaten, because it's practical. If my husband was stuck working late at work. I will check if he has eaten and bring food to him if he has not. Or plan to go out and eat together later.



< Message edited by Greta75 -- 7/5/2017 11:15:20 PM >

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