RE: Greedy feminists clutching DV funding are ruining men’s lives (Full Version)

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longwayhome -> RE: Greedy feminists clutching DV funding are ruining men’s lives (7/10/2017 9:38:46 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: WinsomeDefiance


quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

One may wonder why don't men being left with kids have the same consideration.


Anyone who feels compelled to form a Non-Profit organization, and has a vision to meet the needs of men specifically can step up and do the leg work, fund raising and recruiting to make it happen. It isn't impossible, and it isn't as if they'd be setting a precedent.



Thank you Win for sharing your experiences, which certainly bring the real-life issues here into sharp relief.

rm is wrong however. Services for men do exist, they are just not universal and don't cover all the need out there (neither of course do services for women as your story testifies to).

Where there are serious concerns about child protection of course social services step in, and in my country at least, entire families have been re-homed at very short notice regardless of the sex of the remaining partner. Sadly safely extracting the abused partner and making the children safe don't always mean the same thing or the same accommodation.

There are of course models for non-profit organisations that support men. rm only has to do some research in his own country if he doesn't want to look at the projects there are internationally.

As you say - it's not impossible.




AtUrCervix -> RE: Greedy feminists clutching DV funding are ruining men’s lives (7/12/2017 4:14:06 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

Invented any new feminist double standards lately?

Gotta larf


(Are you trying to start a Meme?)




PeonForHer -> RE: Greedy feminists clutching DV funding are ruining men’s lives (7/12/2017 4:34:48 PM)

quote:

DV services are woefully underfunded here in Australia too. There is a permanent shortage of beds at refuges which has the nasty effect of forcing people to remain in abusive relationships, often at risk of serious violence, until a space can be found for them. This can take days weeks or even months ...


It strikes me that all this stuff, though, is about 'first aid' - desperate, emergency, 'patch-up treatment' after the damage has already been done. There are men who treat women this way, and don't think twice about it, and there are women who get treated this way, and don't really understand that anything is wrong about their treatment. (And, yep, you occasionally get that with the genders reversed.) People can have the good luck to get sanctuary in one of these shelters - but, really, such people have already had a thousand times worse luck before even getting there. That these shelters must exist is a sad sign that there's a radical lack of understanding that 'prevention is better than cure'.




longwayhome -> RE: Greedy feminists clutching DV funding are ruining men’s lives (7/13/2017 1:24:36 AM)

I'm with that 100% Peon.

As I said earlier in this thread my greatest sadness is that, despite violent crime reducing and murders of men reducing across the board, (including a large reduction in the numbers of men killed by their partners) over a ten year period in the UK, the figures for violence against women have, especially when measured in hospitalisation and partner murder have hardly changed during that ten year period.

Providing support after the event is one thing, but prevention is surely what we need here. We have to believe it is possible. Violence in western societies is far less acceptable than has combined with other factors to reduce violent crime overall. Changing the environment and attitudes which contribute to family and partner violence against women has to be good for everyone.

I don't see that as only a feminist issue, it is common sense, not to mention good public health.




tweakabelle -> RE: Greedy feminists clutching DV funding are ruining men’s lives (7/13/2017 1:37:24 AM)

Indeed! The question of why DV exists in the first place somehow seems to escape scrutiny in discussions of this type. While this is an issue of great interest to feminists, it is by no means a feminist-only issue. It is a societal issue that demands a society-wide response to solve it.

If we agree that violence is a learned behaviour, then the questions become 'Where and from whom did this person learn this behaviour?' Who taught them violence is a successful conflict resolution strategy? Where did they learn that it is OK to assault their spouses and children? Why did the education system fail to teach them better conflict resolution strategies? Surely by now there is general agreement that being guided by the adage 'Spare the rod and spoil the child' generates violent adults?

It doesn't take a genius to work out that an awful lot of this stuff is acquired very early at home, and reinforced as that child develops into an adult. It seems to me that if the primary carers fail to teach their children non-violent conflict resolution strategies, then there is an overwhelming need for the education system to teach them to children.




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