RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission???

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RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 1/24/2007 1:05:09 PM

TreasurePet

Posts: 30
Joined: 1/15/2007
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I enjoy the pain ... I enjoy the submission.
The submission is a part of my every day life. I do not do anything without permission (though at times it is tacitly given).
Being of use is a wonderful thing. Being the center of attention is FUN. But the pain, the physical sensation of it, is enjoyable.
There are levels of pain that I do not like ... I even get scared when being told about something that is going to be painful as I think it will be pain that I do NOT like. Hasn't turned out that way yet, though.

(in reply to HerTexasBoss)

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RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 1/26/2007 11:38:22 AM

twobearsgirl

Posts: 1
Joined: 1/19/2007
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For me, it's probably half and half. I've always loved a good hard spanking in and of itself, but when my fiance and I finally decided recently that what we really needed was to live a D/s life, everything changed (Duh!).
We stopped fighting, because I stopped fighting him for control. He knows now that if he tells me to do something, it will get done, because I've finally submitted to him. If a task doesn't get done, I won't get a spanking, darn it!
And submitting to him is one of the most powerful turn-ons I've ever known. I feel so freed and alive.

Two Bears' girl

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RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 1/30/2007 10:03:12 AM

CollaredCat

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Hmmm, I started to say it was the submission because I don't really enjoy pain at all ... only that's not quite true either. There are occasions that I can be aroused by pain alone (especially when needles are involved) but those aren't play situations. Other than that, I'd say it's mostly the D/s -- that can and does arouse me in situations where there is no pain involved at all. I am definitely service oriented.

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RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 1/30/2007 11:31:55 AM

desires2

Posts: 39
Joined: 1/26/2007
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Painful pleasures--for me it is both. I crave them both, and enjoy the act of submission and enjoy the pain in our sessions. I am by no means a pain slut...but..I will beg for His flogger. He paints me like a beautiful canvas and every time I see His marks it reminds me how much He loves me and how much I love Him. There are few things He could ask me for that I would deny. I know I am safe with Him and I have no fear.~smiles~

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RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 1/30/2007 6:53:00 PM

mellian

Posts: 211
Joined: 9/6/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: HerTexasBoss

Are there other subs on this board that that is true for....it's not the pain or the enjoyment of the activity, but the submission and domination that turns you on. Perhaps you could careless about the bondage, whippings, etc....it's the sheer act of submission that does it for you??

If any of you could shed light on this or share your thoughts I'd appreciate it.

Thanks
HerTexasBoss

That is something I can definitly relate to and that is probably the case for me as everytime I am imagine such acts, it is the D/s aspect of it that turns me on the most, not the act or play itself. Since I still lack experience, not something I can further elaborate on.

-mellian

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Post #: 85

RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 1/31/2007 1:48:34 AM

asiandoll27

Posts: 101
Joined: 2/5/2005
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it is the submission, most definately so! i am not a lover of pain, or one that is much good at taking it in anything but small dose. but the mind itself can do things and comeup with things that can out last the physical piece - and combined with the act of submission - it can leave you in a position of helplessness that has wondering just what can come next. if donr right, it is more to the tune of actually worried about what will come next and knowing you must accept it.

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RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 1/31/2007 2:10:43 AM

Aurelius2

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Joined: 10/16/2005
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Complex question, but here's an angle on it.

I've been into bdsm for 40+ years and I still remember an early scene when I was sub - I didn't enjoy the content (in this case unpleasant rather than painful, but similar difference) and only reluctantly continued. I continued because the act of submission was enjoyable enough to outweight the unpleasantness. But by the end of the session I was at a real high, and afterwards I felt it was a huge success.

More recently, however, in the occasional scenes where I sub, I'm not interested in anything too painful or too unpleasant - they become an instant turn-off.

Thus my point is not just the standard post "everyone's different" but also that people's mental approach to bdsm can change markedly too. And also the point that, when done with care, stretching a sub's limits can create a lasting and hugely fulfilling memory.

So my guess is go for it HerTexasBoss and keep up the treatment - you'll be giving her something she'll treasure for life

Aurelius2

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RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 1/31/2007 2:25:07 AM

lucylu27

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This is such an interesting question. i think for me, it started as taking pain and liking pain because of the submission of giving that to a sadistic Master....but over a period of years, the body and mind becomes accustomed to the association of pain and arousal. Hence, there's certain types of pain which now just arouse me, regardless of the exact DS circumstances of it. There are though, of course, other types of pain i'd still only be able to endure for a specific person...which brings it back full circle to submission.

lucy x

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Post #: 88

RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 2/3/2007 4:44:37 AM

goodpet

Posts: 458
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for this girl it is not the pain but the act of submission to the Top giving me the pain.

i get off on the submission to it, not the actual pain itself.

(in reply to LaMspeach)

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RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 2/3/2007 6:04:51 AM

KeirasSecret

Posts: 415
Joined: 8/17/2006
From: central NH
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For me, it's all about feeling the power; the energy exchange. I've found this happens in many situations but, the more intense the situationt the stronger the flow of energy.

Be well,

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Bitching; whining in a louder voice.

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RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 2/3/2007 9:01:27 PM

Zsuzsanna

Posts: 108
Joined: 12/17/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: HerTexasBoss

A couple of weeks ago I posted a message about my sub and how she was having trouble embracing the fact that she liked pain. Most of the response centered on talking with her and getting her in contact with other subs.

As we have continued to talk, it is seeming to emerge that what is REALLY turning her on is not the pain...but the act of submission itself. she doesn't get soaking wet because she enjoys the whipping or hot wax....she doesn't enjoy it....it seems she gets soaking wet because she is being dominated and submissive.

Are there other subs on this board that that is true for....it's not the pain or the enjoyment of the activity, but the submission and domination that turns you on. Perhaps you could careless about the bondage, whippings, etc....it's the sheer act of submission that does it for you??

If any of you could shed light on this or share your thoughts I'd appreciate it.

Thanks
HerTexasBoss

I like the foggings, yes. But it IS the act of completely submitting that does it for me. I love it SO much. I don't feel right if I'm not doing it. And to submit to a completely deserving person is the most wonderful thing. I don't know what I would do if I didn't.

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RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 2/5/2007 8:18:01 PM

needdiscipline23

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Joined: 5/14/2005
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This is something i've been considering a lot lately, as i've just recently stepped from online lurking to r/l play. my limited experience has shown me that a huge part of it is the pain, but that simply seems to be b/c the pain is what REALLY communicates to me that i'm submitted to someone else's authority and control. if something else communicated that to me, i think (*maybe*) i could do without the pain...but i can't imagine anything else really getting through to me that way...it's like i'm hardwired for that.

Meh, i don't know if that makes sense. i don't THINK i'm a pain slut, and don't have a very high tolerance yet. But for me, the pain IS the submission. So it's gotta be there.

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RE: Is it the Pain or the Act of Submission??? - 2/5/2007 9:21:08 PM

BreatheinToMe

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Joined: 1/8/2007
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I agree, for me it's the act of submission, and that my Dom has me under his control, that trips my trigger. But most recently, when I had endured some pain, for him, it exponentiated my level of passion/submissiveness. I wonder if that will eventually lead me into being a masochist? not sure.

And for me, I am the type to help out, or give service, but it is not a replacement for my relationship.

quote:

ORIGINAL: sublizzie

For me it's about the submission. I've said frequently "I'll endure to please". That's it for me in a nutshell. I will endure the pain to please the Dom/me. I can be just as fulfilled in my submission by getting someone a bottle of ice water or filling their plate with food. I *like* serving, which sometimes comes with pain. But it's the serving, the submission, the letting go of control that really gets to me.

(in reply to sublizzie)

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Post #: 93