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All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor

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for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor - 8/7/2006 8:47:12 PM

maybemaybenot

Posts: 2817
Joined: 9/22/2005
Status: offline

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can
walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
gut, and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.

_____________________________

Tolerance of evil is suicide.- NYC Firefighter

When tolerance is not reciprocated, tolerance becomes surrender.

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RE: for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor - 8/7/2006 9:15:11 PM

MarksFantasyGirl

Posts: 3660
Joined: 10/13/2005
Status: offline

lol i liked them.... i mean, i don't believe any of them.... but i liked them... and if men can believe that shit, let 'em.... the girls know better! lol

_____________________________

--Fannie
AKA Savage's Fantasy
AKA Girl Dave
AKA Resident Flirt
AKA Sexy Hawt Woman

~*~Happily and proudly collared by my best friend~*~

Quitcher bitchen, and get out of the kitchen! ~Harry {3rdRock}

(in reply to maybemaybenot)

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RE: for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor - 8/7/2006 9:49:17 PM

Misstoyou

Posts: 1149
Joined: 9/4/2004
Status: offline

Cute! I'm going to have the puppy read them out loud to me, one at a time, and smack him after every one.

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~ Miss Marie

a.k.a. "mean Lady"

(in reply to maybemaybenot)

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RE: for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor - 8/7/2006 11:12:30 PM

MistressLorelei

Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline

Smaller feet.... larger intellect. It was a tough compromise... and we got the boobies too.

(in reply to Misstoyou)

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RE: for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor - 8/8/2006 1:19:27 AM

s661055

Posts: 114
Joined: 11/15/2004
From: Denmark/Austria
Status: offline

you know why the bride is always in white? thats the color of all kitchen appliances...

(in reply to MistressLorelei)

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RE: for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor - 8/8/2006 8:04:59 AM

Saratov

Posts: 1716
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

Married men don't really live longer than single men, it just seems longer.

(in reply to s661055)

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RE: for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor - 8/20/2006 2:48:09 PM

ThatLilBrat

Posts: 149
Joined: 2/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: maybemaybenot
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Wonders if that translates to ...

What's worse than a Dom/me?
A sub who won't do what she's told

<seriously cracks up>

<thinks about hiding under desk to avoid flying objects heading my way>

_____________________________

Remember the three R's:
Respect for self;
Respect for others; and
Responsibility for ALL your actions and accept the consquences of your decisions

(in reply to maybemaybenot)

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RE: for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor - 8/20/2006 6:34:03 PM

Cutiepie74019

Posts: 106
Joined: 7/25/2006
Status: offline

lmao i gotta agree < throws a cookie at ThatLilBrat " good job >

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"There are thorns everywhere, but along the path of vice, roses bloom above them."

Marquis DeSade

(in reply to ThatLilBrat)

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RE: for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor - 8/20/2006 7:44:53 PM

pounddog

Posts: 65
Joined: 6/2/2006
Status: offline

if i laugh at this ill never find a Domme..

_____________________________

Man's Prayer , im a Man, but i can change , if i have to, i guess........ Red Green....

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RE: for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor - 8/20/2006 8:41:47 PM

ThatLilBrat

Posts: 149
Joined: 2/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: pounddog

if i laugh at this ill never find a Domme..

Go ahead and laugh, I won't tell anyone ...

and if I am tempted to tell, I'll email you first so that you can have an opportunity to bribe me NOT to taddle.

I take PayPal

< Message edited by ThatLilBrat -- 8/20/2006 8:51:10 PM >

_____________________________

Remember the three R's:
Respect for self;
Respect for others; and
Responsibility for ALL your actions and accept the consquences of your decisions

(in reply to pounddog)

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RE: for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor - 8/21/2006 3:57:26 AM

Saratov

Posts: 1716
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

She probably takes chocolate and other candy too.

(in reply to ThatLilBrat)

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RE: for the men.. and the woman with a sense of humor - 8/21/2006 1:39:01 PM

ThatLilBrat

Posts: 149
Joined: 2/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Saratov

She probably takes chocolate and other candy too.

<cracks up>

true

_____________________________

Remember the three R's:
Respect for self;
Respect for others; and
Responsibility for ALL your actions and accept the consquences of your decisions

(in reply to Saratov)

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Post #: 12