Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Discuss.


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Discuss. Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4 5   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 8:16:09 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline
Well, it seems most people expect men to work, while they don't always expect women to work. I am not sure this is fair. In any case, I do lots of volunteer work - well, maybe not lots - but more than the average person, probably. Some people don't see that as work, and to me it is so much fun, it's not, really, I guess. 

- Susan

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to Chaingang)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 8:23:47 AM   
meatcleaver


Posts: 9030
Joined: 3/13/2006
Status: offline
I wouldn't say I think men should work and women not or at least shouldn't have to, a chance to be a lazy male that lunches while ones partner has a hard day on the building site or shipyard, would be a fine thing. I think I could get use to a life that has the sole aim of satisfying her on the occasions she has enough energy left to indulge in the pleasures of the flesh.

(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 8:25:26 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline
Okay. Thanks for the reply! Although I am not sure I'd ever be working in a shipyard. I hate yardwork.

- Susan 

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to meatcleaver)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 8:42:26 AM   
twicehappy


Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kinkiminx

I can't be one of those subs who says "whichever way my Dom chooses" whether I am happy with it or not, because as well as the need for power exchange most people have other needs too, and when it comes down to it people should be able to work with each other's needs if they're going to be together.


If Scooter and Jewel did not see to it that i have things i love to do as well as care for the house i would feel the same way. But when i wanted a garden they provided everything for it, if i want to race they have no objection and would offer support, i want to wrench, there are 2 builds and a restoration to do.

I am happily provided with the means to do those things i enjoy and i never have to ask or feel like i am begging for something. If we go to yard sales money is put in my pocket (even though I have some of my own I am not allowed to spend that), if we go shopping my things go in the cart without question. They pay attention and are usually one step ahead of me when it comes to seeing to it that i am provided for.

I know I am lucky and I am grateful they care so much; it is this kind of stuff that makes me comfortable with staying home.


_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to kinkiminx)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 8:55:50 AM   
stockingluvr54


Posts: 673
Joined: 6/22/2006
Status: offline
Everyones situation is abit different so it's kind of hard to make a blanket statement. I think basically the situation helps determine who's doing what? Personally I think a relationship takes both parties to contribute....be it work a job if needed or work the home or what ever it takes to make the relationship/household function healthy? Imho.....a persons work ethic says alot about that persons character and ability to contribute equally? If the money is there....having a partner working around the home would be great....if not...an outside job is in order. Just like a normal relationship...ya do whatever it takes and if one party is slackin...adios!

(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 9:05:32 AM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline
Well, I'm in a totally different position than most people as I'm retired from the military.
Those types of jobs like "firefighter" and "Police Officer" and a few others are what's called "young men's jobs".
You don't see a lot of 50 year old or older firefighters or military people. The physical demands are just too tough.
When I was in the Navy and Coast Guard, we'd be gone for months sometimes at sea, living on a ship and working many hours per week sometimes 100 hours per week if we were on a rescue mission or other evolution.
My ship was in the Florida Straights in 1980 when Castro let out all the people in his jails in what they called the "Mariel Boatlift Operation." What a mess that was.
And we'd do "Haitian Migrant Interdiction Operations" and we were always on the lookout for drug smuggling.
Now, I enjoy my retirement which I earned through many years of hard work and long hours.
Financially, I really don't have to work. I still manage to save money most months and I have a few investments which are doing pretty well.
And yes Susan, Volunteering is working in my mind.
You are helping people and making our country a better place to live in! (I got a nice thankyou card from Father Flanagan's Girls and Boys Home yesterday.)
Now, that being said, if you're a younger Dom in your 30's and not financially independant I think you should be working.

(in reply to twicehappy)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 9:17:36 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
I can see this being a viable option in a gay relationship, but in a het one...well...there's challenges. While we have made great advances towards equal pay, we must face the fact that women still do not have the overall earning power of men. So, you're average woman would not earn as much as the average man (Yes, I'm aware that there are VERY successful women...but how many women do YOU know that make a large salary?). This means that the household wouldn't be supported in the same financial way, or perhaps even in the same bracket, than if the male worked outside the home.

Of course, there is the whole idea of a harem of women all working outside the home to support the Dominant Male. It could work, but I'm betting he'd want at least one at home to entertain him, clean and cook during the day. I would if I were in that situation, I think.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 9:20:19 AM   
t3nth0usandv0lts


Posts: 70
Joined: 8/7/2006
Status: offline
Please forgive my ignorance this once... but what is a sprong?

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 9:20:24 AM   
SalemWiK


Posts: 15
Joined: 3/31/2006
Status: offline
This seems like another "personal prefference" question. Personally, I've been unemployed the past two years because of a depression and a lack of job opertunities in this area; however, I have one rule. Please note this rule applys for me, and myself only, and that is follows: "I will not take a permenant slave until I am employed." Now this has nothing to do with the "Big Man must bring in the money" but more along the lines that I'm the kind of Dom whom, either with a submissive or a "little girl", rewards his pets with random gifts, toys or outfits. I could  "never" take their money - from them - to buy them their rewards. It's just not how I was raised.

Of course my belief is simple: A Dom should be civilised, and a Dom at all times. Why would the "Master" clean the house of his slave, while his slave worked? Furthermore why would the Mistress, or Domme, lower herself to being a "maid" and living on an allowance from the slave? Someone earlier brought up a break-up of Gender Rolls, well I don't see it as much as a Gender-roll as much as I do as a with the Dom/sub rolls. Now if it was a situation where you had a Dom(me)/Dom(me) relationship and one worked, while the other kept the house with the slave then.. By all means, but a Dom submitting to his/her slave? What are they going to do? Make the sub/slave bust their ass off for forty hours a week then make them clean the house ontop of their own chores? No, no.

(in reply to meatcleaver)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 9:31:43 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
Ummm...I don't know. If I used the term, it's a misspelling of something...but I don't see it in my answer. Am I missing it? We often see what we expect to see...and I don't expect to see "sprong".

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to t3nth0usandv0lts)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 9:33:37 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline
A sprong is a slang word for child (since we are not allowed to discuss anything having to do with kids here on the boards. It's against the rules). They are also referred to as "unmentionables" by some people. So, if you see that term, that is what they are referring to - kids.

- Susan

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to t3nth0usandv0lts)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 9:36:32 AM   
gentlethistle


Posts: 186
Joined: 10/28/2005
Status: offline
Sprong?  Or sprog?
The latter is commonly used in the UK, the former I've never heard or seen before in this or any other context.

Laura

(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 9:37:31 AM   
t3nth0usandv0lts


Posts: 70
Joined: 8/7/2006
Status: offline
Understood, thank you ma'am.

(in reply to gentlethistle)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 9:38:11 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline
I didn't coin the term sprong. heartfelt sub used it, so maybe she will come back and answer.

- Susan

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to gentlethistle)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 9:42:05 AM   
Rule


Posts: 10479
Joined: 12/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: t3nth0usandv0lts

Please forgive my ignorance this once... but what is a sprong?

There is at least one subject that is never refered to here, unless in oblique terms. Change the vowel to an i and it should be a 'little bit' clearer. (In fact, it may have been a typo - on my keyboard the i and the o are next to each other..)

< Message edited by Rule -- 8/22/2006 9:59:34 AM >

(in reply to t3nth0usandv0lts)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 9:45:45 AM   
stockingluvr54


Posts: 673
Joined: 6/22/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

A sprong is a slang word for child (since we are not allowed to discuss anything having to do with kids here on the boards. It's against the rules). They are also referred to as "unmentionables" by some people. So, if you see that term, that is what they are referring to - kids.

- Susan


I just mentioned "unmentionables" in another post and I was reffering to underwear? Uh oh.....might have a few scratching their heads...oh well

(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 10:01:59 AM   
Voltare


Posts: 841
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: Santiago, Chile
Status: offline
Wow, the subject of this thread is definately a statement on par with nails on a chalkboard (or eating paper.)

Most of the responses, naturally, have been focused on the financial aspects of work for obvious reasons.  I'll touch on a couple non-financial issues.

First, strictly from the Ds context, one could argue that a submissive or slave would generally have a natural obligation to dedicate their lives to their owner/dominant.  This comes by widely varying degrees, so this should really only apply to those relationships where devotion is an expectation.  With this in mind, what value does this devotion have if the devoted is ultimately responsible for the well-being of the devotee?  This is all too common amonst male submissives and female dominants, best known as money slaves or financial domination.  From my own perspective, this seems to somehow be related to extremely poor self esteem, where the submissive feels they must somehow 'buy' themselves into the dominants good graces.

By contrast, there's seems to be a far more common dynamic amongst female submissives and male dominants, in that Ds is simply the modern incarnation of the Hunter/Gatherer instinct.  The male's responsibility as the larger, stronger sex translates into the successful businessman using his mind to acheive goals (translating into wealth and power.)  The hard working mechanic or factory worker, or construction worker too, demonstrates this dynamic, as the man goes to his employment, exerts a great deal of effort, and 'brings home the bread.' 

None of the scenerios I've mentioned actually reflect the financial requirements of living.  People tend to learn to live within their means, the power-businessman driving a Porsche, while the factory worker buys a new Ford.  There's no question that an entrepreneur, having lost his fortune and business due to any type of disaster could learn to drive a Ford.  So, the real question is - Why Work?

This is a more simple issue.  People who work are more likely to find satisfaction in their lives.  Work (in any form) provides social interaction opportunities, stability to ones daily life, and provides each and every person with a chance to contribute to a better society - directly and indirectly.  People who don't actually have employment for long periods usually have to find ways to fill each day, the traditional housewife doing charity work, child rearing, or otherwise involved in the local community.  People who don't fill their days constructively often times can become depressed, anti-social, and/or addicted to chemicals (alcohol, marijuana, etc.) 

The last point, of course, is work for a living.  The 'living' part is a basic necessity on the part of every person living within a social structure.  Everyone must eat, sleep, have shelter, clothing, and medical care.  No society would function if each member within refused to earn these necessities, but depended on others to provide it - thus the concept of the social contract comes into play.  The social contract, essentially, suggest that every person in their society must contribute, at minimum, what they take from it.  My contribution should never by passed to anyone else, so long as I am capable of it.  In capitalist societies, this comes in the form of work, with money being the end result.

So yes.  Male Doms should work for a living.

Stephan


_____________________________

http://www.vv3b.com/

"There is always some madness in love, but there is always some reason in madness." - F. Nietzsche

(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 10:11:02 AM   
gentlethistle


Posts: 186
Joined: 10/28/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: t3nth0usandv0lts
Understood, thank you ma'am.
                                                               (in reply to gentlethistle)


Eh?

(in reply to t3nth0usandv0lts)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 10:15:46 AM   
indybbwsubbie


Posts: 51
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline
Sorry - i been thru the wringer last yr with a guy who was a wannabe dom - and couldn't handle his own finances.  Almost married him.  i believe that a Dom should be a leader - and have a submissive/slave that desires to serve ........not becuz the Dom is too lazy and just wants a meal ticket.  i think the same thing about submissives/slaves.  But hell - i am just an opinionated slave!!! 

(in reply to gentlethistle)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Dis... - 8/22/2006 10:31:43 AM   
Morsprofundis


Posts: 11
Joined: 8/14/2006
Status: offline
Question-do you want to be a dominant man, or a pimp, pander, ponce and all around slug?
The Master provides and administers, the slave works as instructed.
Or gets whipped and sent to bed hungry!


_____________________________

What have you got to lose, it's only electricity!

(in reply to indybbwsubbie)
Profile   Post #: 60
Page:   <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Male Doms should not have to work for a living. Discuss. Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4 5   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078