Responsibilities of a Dom-me/sub

Responsibilities of a Dom-me/sub (Full Version)

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MsWillAdore -> Responsibilities of a Dom-me/sub (8/26/2006 11:30:06 AM)
I have this posted in the "Ask A Master" forum as well: What are the responsibilites of a Dominant while in a scene and with His/Her submissive when not playing? What are the responsibilites of a submissive while in a scene and with his/her Dominant when not playing? Are these just understood or should these responsibilites be communicated between Dominant and submissive? Are responsibilities on the same line as limits and needs?

MsWillAdore -> RE: Responsibilities of a Dom-me/sub (8/26/2006 11:32:17 AM)
And damn if I didn't cut off the last paragraph... damn fingers! "Are responsibilities on the same line as limits and needs? Is the Dominant responsible for His/Her submissive's feelings, attitude..etc. If so, what is it the Dominant should in order to change any negative feelings, attitude..etc the submissive may have about Him/Herself or the relationship as a "whole"? " quote: ORIGINAL: MsWillAdore I have this posted in the "Ask A Master" forum as well: What are the responsibilites of a Dominant while in a scene and with His/Her submissive when not playing? What are the responsibilites of a submissive while in a scene and with his/her Dominant when not playing? Are these just understood or should these responsibilites be communicated between Dominant and submissive? Are responsibilities on the same line as limits and needs?

thetammyjo -> RE: Responsibilities of a Dom-me/sub (8/26/2006 11:44:30 AM)
Your responsibilities beyond those of being a good human being are things you need to discuss in negotiation. Don't take anything for granted. Or to put it in a slightly rude way "Assuming things makes an ass out of me and u."

ladylexington -> RE: Responsibilities of a Dom-me/sub (8/27/2006 7:37:10 PM)
A large part of the responsibities you mentioned depends on the level of power exchange. "Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns" has a nice summary of each person's responsibilities depending on the relationship's extent of power exchange. I try very hard, especially in the beginning of a realtionship, to communicate everything. Not only does it make everyone's role clearer, it establishes my requirements, fosters trust, encourages honesty, and tends to build more emotional awareness in the sub. This also helps if I choose to address a sub's attitude toward himself, the lifestyle, or the relationship. Communication also helps me screen prospects very closely, so our limits and needs mesh. If a sub is unhappy with the relationship, we talk about the issue. And, more than once, I have dissolved a play relationship because the sub was unhappy. I'd rather end the relationship while I still cared enough for the sub to support him during the transition.

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