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ShadowHwk -> Discerning the Truth (1/21/2004 6:16:41 AM)
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Discerning the Truth of a new Contact
These are just some things I have learned over the years from meeting people from the ‘net. Things that help me figure out if a person is really who they say they are. It is a sad thing, but many on the ‘net, and in the world pretend to be what they are not. Why? Good question. Usually it is fear based… some insecurity. The truth always seems to come out in the end… makes you wonder why some would bother trying to deceive in the first place.
- Does the voice match the picture? What do I mean by this? Does that deep and throaty voice sound like it could come from the picture of this 110 lb woman? The same goes for men. Certain body types, because of the nature of how sound produces and travels can only produce a certain range of sound. NOTE: There are exceptions to everything, this included. But pay attention.
- Do they ask for personal, private information, but give none in return? For example a phone number or address? But are unwilling to give the same in return at some point? Now, in the beginning, when just getting to know each other, it simply good common sense for most to limit the amount of information that is given, on both sides. No one needs a stalker in his or her life. BUT after a reasonable period, for things to move forward, you must take the first step, and that usually involves an exchange of phone numbers. AN Exchange. If someone wants your number, and wants to call you whenever, but wont let you call them, ever – it is time to get a bit suspicious – what are they trying to hide? And from whom? It may be simple, but then again it may not.
- Does the person have a website showing pictures of a spouse and kids, yet they say they are not married? Time to ask some hard questions.
- Do some things just not add up? Pay attention to your gut instincts – what do they tell you? Do they scream at you when ever you get near this person? If they do then you should probably listen. The unconscious mind can pick up on all sorts of clues that our conscious mind simply doesn’t notice or process.
As mentioned else where, a good idea is to use a webcam to get a look at a person real time. Because of it’s real-time, interactive nature it is much harder to fake. And in the long run can save you a lot of heartache. Yes because of firewalls and routers, and software issues they can be a pain to setup…. But isn’t that almost insignificant compared to the pain of letting someone into your life emotionally only to find they are not at all what they pretended to be?
What is the point I am trying to make here? It is that you should be careful and not get carried away to fast. That new Mr or Mrs Right may not really be what they say they are, and you should use your common sense, and all the tools you have available to ascertain the truth before letting someone into your life.
Second, don’t be afraid to ask hard questions. Pay attention to the answers. The truth has a ring to it, a quality, a self-sustaining quality that lies cannot match. The puzzle pieces in the best lie don’t fit nearly so well together as does the simple truth.
Peace and Light
Terry
AKA ShadowHwk
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