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RE: D/S as BDSM. - 10/3/2006 11:02:10 AM

Jasmyn

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From: New Zealand
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Gypsylee ...I like them for their fetish and ritualistic elements too ... yum yum ;)

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RE: D/S as BDSM. - 10/3/2006 11:12:30 AM

Jasmyn

Posts: 1234
Joined: 2/6/2004
From: New Zealand
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I like to think scene bottoming/topping and relationship bottoming/topping are both real in terms of D/S ...neither is more than the other ...thanks for the thought provoking post ;)

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RE: D/S as BDSM. - 10/3/2006 11:12:48 AM

thetammyjo

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Joined: 9/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Iskander

I can't claim to know every aspect of BDSM, but in the bits I do know, I see Ds as an integral part to some degree...
However, Ds is also very much present in daily (non-kink) life, thus seperate... Other aspects of BDSM generally don't fit in daily life...

So my (limited) opinion is that one can have Ds without BDSM, but not BDSM without Ds...

Iskander..

I've done a lot of SM without any power or authority exchange or dynamic.

I had a buddy I did knife play with in NYC for almost a year. He was in no way my submissive he was a willing canvus for my art. He did only what he liked and only as he liked -- we just happened to like to do knife play in similar ways.

I've done a few floggings and spankings at birthday parties for the birthday gal/guy and never felt in any way dominant with them -- it was a gift I gave them in the form of a flogging or spanking.

I'd have people come to me to learn a particular skill or to see how some activity felt for them but who had no interest in submitting to me. Often these were folks who would turn around and use that knowledge as tops or dom themselves. I was simply happy to teach them what I knew for a short period of time and had no interest in them as subs or partners.

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RE: D/S as BDSM. - 10/3/2006 11:22:32 AM

Archer

Posts: 3207
Joined: 3/11/2005
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Just for laughs.

BDSM =                                                Fruit
D/s =                                                  Citrus fruits
Daddy or Mommy / girl or boy =              Tangerine
M/s =                                                Grapefruit
BD=                                                   Drupes (peaches, mango, cherries)
SM=                                                  Berries

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RE: D/S as BDSM. - 10/3/2006 11:41:02 AM

Jasmyn

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lol don't forget the chocolate sauce and ice cream ;)

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RE: D/S as BDSM. - 10/3/2006 6:46:06 PM

diamonddreamlove

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Joined: 5/19/2006
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For me they are all separate aspects that all exist within my relationship. We are D/s all the time does that mean we are M/s well not sure since i see M/s as more live in type and perhaps an even deeper form of submission. However i would feel cheated if i did not have the BD and the SM as well. They do not have to be there all the time like the D/s must be for me. Overall i think all are good!!!!

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RE: D/S as BDSM. - 10/3/2006 8:52:04 PM

ownedgirlie

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I believe you can have one without the other, however in my particular situation, I am in a D/s (M/s) relationship which incorporates BDSM into it. If either of us were physically incapacitated, there would still be the D/s (M/s) aspect. In other words, I submit to him in all ways, whether we incorporate physical play or not.

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RE: D/S as BDSM. - 10/3/2006 10:05:12 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
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quote:

Anyway the question ... D/S where it fits for you?

D/s fits under the "Alternative Lifestyles" umbrella for me, which is essentially all that we do, regardless of skill or tecnique.

quote:

You see D/S as a seperate identity/lifestyle to BDSM (eg totally unrelated, can have D/S without BDSM?

I've never seen it separate from BDSM, but now feel like I'm being asked if I think we should get a divorce.

Yes, I believe it fits within BDSM, but can stand completely on it's own without involving bondage, discipline, sadism or masochism at all. When subs/slaves ask me my hard limits, I'm never sure what to tell them, because I think they expect it is scat; my hard limit is lack of submission, losing the dynamic for which we signed up as a Dominant and Submissive.
My profile states that I specifically seek someone who is interested in power exchange. Many people may not contact me because of my interest list, when the only interest on my list that trully matters is a significant degree of power exchange; everything else is open to negotiation.

quote:

You think of D/S as the essence of BDSM (eg it's inclusion is moot: without it bondage, discipline, sadism, masochism, master, slave would not exisit)?

Absolutely not the essence. I think it clarifies and simplifies roles, but that is only my perspective, and lord knows I am biased in this regard.
I think it's fairly easy for most people doing BDSM to do it without any significant power exchange relationship. I could easily play with any number of people (if I ever got over being shy), and not be in a power exchange situation with them. M

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