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RE: Who serves who? - 10/10/2006 6:02:03 PM

DivaDuchess

Posts: 402
Joined: 8/17/2006
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It could just be a comment made because she was tired, neither dominant nor submissive. Just tired. While the comment taken in context is dominant ... she perhaps, was just tired.

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Courage is not the absence of Fear,
But rather the judgement that,
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The Brave may not live forever,
But the Cautious do not live at all.

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RE: Who serves who? - 10/11/2006 4:24:20 AM

twicehappy

Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
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Could be either the dom or the sub.

I wait on Scooter and Jewel, i take care of the house, the bikes, the yard but Scooter works every day to keep Jewel and i home and not working so who is serving who?

I am still serving him, it is his will that i not work so i can be home ready for him when he gets here.

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RE: Who serves who? - 10/11/2006 5:19:43 AM

LeatherBentOne

Posts: 469
Joined: 9/27/2005
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I am disabled and unable to work outside the home. My sub puts in a full day at work, has responsibilities of an elderly parent who lives outside the home, and interests that are separate from mine. Tonight, as with most nights, she will come home to a neat/clean house with dinner ready. She has responsibilities toward the house in proportion to her responsibilities outside the home. I wish her to remain healthy and have energy to devote to needs and wants, vice versa.

In a fantasy world, I'd love to have a submissive at home with me to satisfy my every beck and call. What Dominant wouldn't? Service is a task, not a mindset. It fails to make one more Dominant or submissive for that matter. BDSM begins in the mind, rather than the brawn.

LBO

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RE: Who serves who? - 10/11/2006 7:54:28 AM

raiken

Posts: 868
Joined: 10/18/2005
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Hello everyone and thanks for sharing your good thoughts. My best girlfriend is submissive in her relationships, but dominant in every other area of her life. To meet her you would think she was a domme. *grin i am much the same way, i guess that is why we are kindred souls. i agree with the perspectives shared here.

i have met those who would disagree with what has been shared in this thread. Those who feel that because one is dominant they shouldn't have a weak moment, or they shouldn't let their slave know about it, for it reduces them in a slaves mind somehow. Or, if one is slave, they shouldn't be strong and mindful, and oh...slaves don't get massages from their masters, it should be the other way around...sheesh LOL. *scratches head along with Master Fire*

i have never understood or fit in with those that entertain that type of thinking. i have one subbie pal, who can't believe that one of the Masters i serve, was rubbing my sore and tired feet one time. i thought she was going to have an asthma attack, in between all of her gasps for air. i never understood why it is so hard for some to see a Master or dominant caring for their sub/slave in such ways as massage and drawing baths, etc. Hey if someone wants to care for me in that way, i am not going to refuse. *grin i am not going to feel bad about someone (dominant or no) wishing to make me feel good.

She and i were joking last night about subs who are dominantly submissive, and the doms who are submissively dominant. LOL

Thanks again for sharing your thoughts.

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RE: Who serves who? - 10/11/2006 9:29:42 PM

Mavis

Posts: 828
Joined: 2/8/2004
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i don't have this kink, but i DO think it would be fun to do equine a bit, if only for the nice horse brushing i might get...

i really need that tactile rememberance of my value. (ok, before someone tweaks, yes, i know my intrinsic value, yada-yadas) but i mean, back scratches to wake me up, foot rubs when W/we're on the couch, but usually i have His foot while He has mine. Half-waking from a nap on couch because He's draping a blankie over me.. when my soul is cozy, i have a happier place to surrender. W/we both have strong needs to feel cared for, fussed over, and W/we do it fairly blaanced, depending on who needs what when.

Course, that's how W/we do D/s, i don't operate that same way under my M/s relationship, most service i'd get in that is coffee poured or when Master visits, i got "TDY" to the couch for nap when needed. (TDY military term for Temporary Duty.. so i was on orders so to speak)

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RE: Who serves who? - 10/11/2006 9:44:00 PM

theRose4U

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Joined: 8/22/2005
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quote:

Two general perspectives come to mind in the moment. As in, a dominant can come home weary from a hard day, to a caring sub or slave, who knows exactly what is needed to please and serve the dominant. A sub or slave can come home weary from a hard day, and trust that the dominant is there to offer protection and care.

So with this thought in mind, of who serves who, how does this apply to your relationship?

I'm not serving my sub by making sure that they are protected and cared about especially at the end of a hard day. I'm responsible for making sure that both sides of your scenario occur. They are aware of their responsibilities and my needs so that I can come home and unwind from my stress and I am ever alert to the need for plan B of take out and cuddling on the sofa.

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Post #: 26