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BitaTruble -> RE: That "Why" Question (10/20/2006 8:43:29 PM)
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quote:
I read most of the other things you posted, celeste, and they make a lot of sense.
I do, however, have issues with this sentence.
Why? ::ok, ok.. I mean, you throw me a line like that.. I couldn't resist!:: [:D]
quote:
To me, why is just a word. It is an interrogatory requesting more information.
I agree it's just a word but it seeks specific information, to whit: it seeks a reason or purpose. "How" seeks instruction. "What" seeks clarification, both questions I ask when needed. "Why" though, there is only one reason to ask 'why' and that's because one wants to know the purpose or motive of the Master making the command, request etc. Why is just a word, but it's a word with a specific meaning.. and it doesn't mean 'what' or 'how' or 'who'.
I'm a slave .. it's not my business to know such things. Julia is not a slave.. (Egads.. have we stumbled upon the difference between a submissive and a slave?? A submissive can/will ask 'why' and a slave cannot/will not ask why? ::laughs:: sorry.. different thread!) the relationship with you is in it's beginning stages so her asking why, I believe, is a healthy thing for her because she is still in the process of making decisions regarding where the two of you are, where you are going, what you're both about etc. She has every right to know your motives and reasons for the things you say. Maybe she will always want to know or maybe she won't. It's not a right or wrong sort of thing .. that's up to individual parties to determine.
I'm an old, married slave. I don't question purpose, reason or motive .. I have almost 11 years of experience being slave to Himself, so I already know those things. As I told Julia, in the beginning, I asked 'why' a lot.
Asking 'why' of Master tells him that I require to know his motivation for any command he may make of me. To require such answers, to me, is a challenge to his decision making or, his authority, if you will. It is something I "want" for no reason other than to satisfy a curiosity.. especially if we both know I'm going to do exactly has he has told me to do.
Take a look at all of Julia's "why" questions.. and their translations.. If I recall correctly, every one of those translations started with "I want". I pretty much gave up "I want" as well. [:D]
quote:
Whether it is perceived as or actually a challenge exists solely within the mind of one or both of the one saying it, and the one hearing it.
I think it could be viewed either way depending on the motive of the person asking the 'why' questions, so I agree with this statement.
quote:
A Dominant who told their submissive to not do something (like take a promotion at work) in everybodies best interest would seem to me to be not acting in his/her submissive's best interest.
I can't see Julia being with a dominant who would act in such a manner. I know that such a man would never have been able to take my power from me and hold it and keep it for all these years. Perhaps we have differing perceptions of dominant behavior and what sort of behavior would win over a submissive of Julia's caliber. I just can't see 'you' acting in such a manner, so if we are speaking of some hypothetical dominant, I guess my brains can't wrap around the idea that Julia would be with someone like that .. and if she were, then hell, no wonder she would feel like asking Why!
quote:
It would seem to me to be an abdication of her responsibilities to our dynamic for her to simply blindly accept my telling her to not take the promotion.
Given my answer above, it seems to me that such a relationship is already doomed to fail so I suppose it depends on the individual relationship dynamic. I know Himself well enough that if he were to tell me not to take a certain job (and he has, actually, done this exact thing) I know he has set it forth because it 'is' in the best interest of our relationship. I can blindly obey such a command, not ask 'why' and have no issue with asking 'what' the consequences are going to be for me taking a certain job or doing a certain thing. Again, though, I do believe this has come with time.. and in a different circumstance, I would, most likely, have a different answer. (maybe!)
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This is just me, and I could be wrong.
Well, you 'could' be.. but I'd venture to say if that's how your dynamic works, then you're most likely not wrong.
I'm most likely not wrong either though, because this is what works in the dynamic I share with Himself. Neither of us can remember the last time I asked him 'why' to a command.. but, we're aging, the brain cells are dying out, so it could have been this morning and we just don't remember! ::laughs::
Celeste
::edited for re'dumb'dancy::
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