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For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/27/2005 6:35:01 AM   
Natisha


Posts: 4
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline 		I am in a certain situation that has me so frustrated that I am ready to castrate my boy! He suffers from premature ejaculations. Yes, he is very young (21) and I am the second woman that he has known sexually. I have tried cock rings, butt plugs, ginger, nipple clamps and even rubbers to distract one brain from the other to no avail.

The boy can masturbate for a half hour but once inside, 5-10 strokes and it is over no matter how he fights it. The humiliation and shame he is feeling is so mentally degrading. It is not the type of humiliation that is humbling but the type that could ruin him sexually.

For those out there that were young and in the same situation, how did you overcome this?
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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/27/2005 6:41:04 AM   
GreyStorm


Posts: 423
Joined: 1/26/2005
From: Cheeseheadland
Status: offline 		Not that I've ever had this problem (hehe), try training him a bit....example, have him inside of you for a few strokes, and then have him pull out and relax. Then have him inside again. Repeat the process and add a few strokes each time. Build up his stamina. This could help him, plus it could be hours of fun in training.















Or you could tell him to think about baseball.













Or try paxil.










Not that I've ever had this problem.

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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/27/2005 6:55:06 AM   
domtimothy46176


Posts: 670
Joined: 12/25/2004
From: Dayton, Ohio area
Status: offline 		I recall an old HBO documentary where some ex-pornstar, I'm thinking it might have been Marilyn Chambers prior to her revived career as a soft-core actress, was working as sex therapist. One of the things that I filed away, in case of future need, was that there was a process involved in gradually retraining the male response.
At first the male used two condoms and was gently touched and stroked until he felt he was on the verge of climax at which point the stimulation ceased. His task was to try to think beyond his climax as a means of delaying that point. It seemed to focus on his mental stimulation as much as his physical stimulation. I would guess that the particular means would vary according to subject, but I definitely remember the burden of rresponsibility for forming new behavior fell on the male.
hope that is helpful,
Timothy

(in reply to Natisha)
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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/27/2005 7:06:40 AM   
Moleculor


Posts: 189
Joined: 5/23/2004
Status: offline 		I can almost guarantee that the reason he cums so fast is the MENTAL aspect of being inside of you, rather than anything physical. So -physical- solutions aren't.

Solutions, that is.

He most likely needs to be MENTALLY retrained somehow. The methods people have described above are most definitely a good starting point.

(in reply to domtimothy46176)
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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/27/2005 7:54:56 AM   
Somnovi


Posts: 24
Joined: 1/1/2005
Status: offline 		You mean to tell me dead puppies or the thought of granny doesn't slow him down?

On a more serious note there are some other things to consider other than age. Mental state has already been mentioned.

Once he comes is he able to build up excitement again and does it last just as long (or possibly in your case short)?

What is his reaction to just being inside you. No motion just the "lovers embrace"?

Was this an issue for him in the past? (maybe you're just special)

How quickly or easily does he become excited or aroused?

What activities are less likesly to enduce similar arousal? Or does just about anything get him worked up?

Can you (and do you) controle your vaginal contractions?

Often people will associate mental issues with a particular physical act or objectification. Finding out how he makes those connections may be key in being able to build up his stamina.

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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/27/2005 7:57:40 AM   
ProtagonistLily


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Joined: 12/27/2004
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quote:

Often people will associate mental issues with a particular physical act or objectification. Finding out how he makes those connections may be key in being able to build up his stamina.


He might also need medical attention. He's a little young to be having this problem, and there might be a medical condition that can be attributed to this.

Lily

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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/27/2005 8:28:04 AM   
Moleculor


Posts: 189
Joined: 5/23/2004
Status: offline 		Oh! One other thing... After the first orgasm, can he build back up and go again and last longer a second time around, or can he not go a second time, or what?

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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/27/2005 10:13:46 PM   
LdyAuburn


Posts: 179
Joined: 5/9/2004
Status: offline 		Have you tried having him masturbate prior to sex?
The condum idea sounds great as well

(in reply to Moleculor)
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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/27/2005 10:48:55 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily
He's a little young to be having this problem. Lily

I thought this was indeed a problem for younger men who are inexperienced (generally speaking) like the one the OP mentions is hers...
My suggestion is have him masturbate and cum once before you engage in intercourse, and 2: how much of a refractory period does he have/need at 21? So go again, and again, lol...
I'm actually perhaps strange in this case, because I'd rather do it shorter and more times, than 1 very long time.

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)
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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/28/2005 4:20:17 AM   
MizSuz


Posts: 1881
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I'm in agreement with those who suggest masturbation to ejaculation first, then intercourse, then more intercourse.

It's likely he goes so quickly just because of the newness of it all. So take the newness away.

I've implemented techniques in which just before he blows everything STOPS and we do creative visualisations together (that are not sexual) to some small degree of success.

But the most tried and true method is over exposure.

_____________________________

“The more you love, the more you can love—and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
- Robert Heinlein

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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/28/2005 5:16:59 AM   
stef


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Joined: 1/26/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig

quote:

ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily
He's a little young to be having this problem. Lily

I thought this was indeed a problem for younger men who are inexperienced (generally speaking) like the one the OP mentions is hers...

That 'hair trigger' is a very common issue with sexually inexperienced males, but most get over it.

~stef

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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/28/2005 7:44:36 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
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quote:

For those out there that were young and in the same situation, how did you overcome this?



When he is ready to ejaculate reach down and grasp his testes firmly in your hand. Squeeze until you get the desired effect.

(in reply to Natisha)
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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/28/2005 1:49:33 PM   
MizSuz


Posts: 1881
Joined: 1/1/2004
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quote:

When he is ready to ejaculate reach down and grasp his testes firmly in your hand. Squeeze until you get the desired effect.


HA! And when you do let him cum it's going to HURT. hahahaha

Too funny. I like the way you think!

_____________________________

“The more you love, the more you can love—and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
- Robert Heinlein

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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/28/2005 2:03:01 PM   
FangsNfeet


Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline 		The magazine Men's Health offers great advice and various routines and positions you can try to keep they guy from cumming to early.

Instead of going in and out try having him move in a circular pattern.
Maybe he needs to go at a slower rate as well.
Regular non spermicidal condums may help as it decreases the sensitivity a little bit.

See how he masterbates and be there with him when he does it. As he's about to cum have him stop, take a breather untill he's not hard. Then repeat this another time or two and let him cum on by the 3rd time.

Also, weither he's soft or hard, have him tighten his penis muscles 6 times. On the 6th time have him keep the tension for a 10 sec count. He should do this atleast 7 times a day while watching TV, seting down at work, taking a shower, whatever.

On another note, has he been circumsized? I know that when the penis no longer has skin to hide under, it becomes more use to being out and builds a tolerance to sensitivity.

See how this advice works. If you don't have results by two months send me a message and I'll see what else I can think of.






Attachment (1)

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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/28/2005 3:45:34 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

HA! And when you do let him cum it's going to HURT. hahahaha

Too funny. I like the way you think!


I was just mentioning the obvious. Also made me remember back to those days of 30 seconds of sex. One good thing about growing older. Sex lasts longer than 30 seconds.


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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/28/2005 4:32:45 PM   
Natisha


Posts: 4
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline 		Once he comes is he able to build up excitement again and does it last just as long (or possibly in your case short)?

"He can come within seconds of the first....lucky boy!"

What is his reaction to just being inside you. No motion just the "lovers embrace"?

"His reaction - little motion or he would cum instantly"

Was this an issue for him in the past? (maybe you're just special)

"I am special!"

How quickly or easily does he become excited or aroused?

"He is hard as soon as he is undressed."

What activities are less likesly to enduce similar arousal? Or does just about anything get him worked up?

"Raking up dog dung is about it!"

Can you (and do you) controle your vaginal contractions?

"Yes but I don't get to the point of contractions."



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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/28/2005 4:35:40 PM   
Natisha


Posts: 4
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline 		The boy is as healthy as an Ox........no medical issues at all. But from what I have gathered at another forum, I might be giving him to much stimulation.........

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/28/2005 4:40:12 PM   
Natisha


Posts: 4
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline 		I want to thank each of you for your support and suggestions. I will try all suggestions until the boy gets it right. He is built for pleasure and I want to feel it!

Have a good weekend all.....

Natisha

(in reply to Natisha)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 1/28/2005 8:58:03 PM   
ProtagonistLily


Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I want to thank each of you for your support and suggestions. I will try all suggestions until the boy gets it right. He is built for pleasure and I want to feel it!

Have a good weekend all.....

Natisha


You too hon,

Lily

_____________________________

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"
~Dr. Seuss~

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RE: For the young men - premature ejaculations - 2/11/2005 2:00:19 PM   
Bwana55419


Posts: 22
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I don’t think a butt plug would be something to use to keep him from orgasming if anything the additional stimulation to the prostate gland might cause him to cum sooner.

I think you might want to step back from this and view it as a blessing, If he cums to soon act excited and pleased, turn it into a positive experience for him; get him to want to go again as soon as he is done.
Find a way to revel in the fact that his being inside you causes such an instantaneous reaction. This can turn into a real problem if it isn’t handled correctly by you, I have known too many women who have been with men who avoid sex for this very reason.

Practice keeping him on the edge, by stopping or causing pain, draw it out. Have him fuck you with a dildo, and only let him fuck you once it won’t make a difference to you if he ejaculates right away or not.

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)
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