RE: Public D/s - what is it?

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RE: Public D/s - what is it? - 10/24/2006 8:07:45 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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While I am in agreement that I would enjoy having it "not be a big deal" for me to walk around naked or in whatever state of dress or kink attire that I want.

But I also know that "forcing acceptance" is rarely the best track to take when it comes to social change. This isn't forcing white people to accept that blacks deserve the same education- a situation that truly did need the forcing of some to make a difference.

I am not an activist. I support the activists who are out there in the NCSF and WFF and local organizations who are working to make kink life safe and secure, who are pushing the message that who we are and what we do is just another form of living a life.

But it's not enough of an issue for me to become personally active nor do I suggest others to start a "in your face" push in order to gain acceptance at this point in time.

I am who I am no matter where I go or what I do.

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RE: Public D/s - what is it? - 10/24/2006 8:27:37 AM

Dnomyar

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I have seen couples in public with their slave/.submissive wearing a ringed collar. I have also seen couples in public where the woman is dressed as a school girl and carrying a back pack. It is all in the persons attitude. You will draw stares and if that bothers you then don't do it.

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RE: Public D/s - what is it? - 10/24/2006 8:31:27 AM

Arpig

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Fast reply....
I don't think the sensibilities of the vanillas is of any importance whatsoever. Nor do I buy the idea that I somehow need their consent to be the way I am in front of them. There are laws in place in every jurisdiction that dictate what is and what is not acceptable behaviour in public, and as long as you are abiding by those laws, then go right ahead, lead your slave down the street on a leash, I bet its 100% legal, and if some vanilla doesn't like it, to fucking bad, tell them to get the law changed.

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RE: Public D/s - what is it? - 10/24/2006 11:25:48 AM

MistressSassy66

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Joined: 11/5/2004
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Public things include carrying bags,purse,opening doors.

I have had a male submissive carry the nightie I wanted, actually it was for him,but I thought it would a lil much to say something like"heres your nightie danielle"(who is a very big guy).Once out to the car it becomes a lil more private and I am able to make comments without My submissive being completely overwhelmed or humiliated to a point of it being harmful.

bishop doesnt embarrass easily,so when her and I go out you never know what will be said or done.If I see something that looks like I can use it for a spanking bench...I will have her try it out by bending over it.Another fav thing is to go to the spoons and spatula areas,testing them out on bishop can be a whole lot of fun.
Sometimes W/we get funny looks... sometimes people have laughed.Once had someone say that looks like fun..LOL

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RE: Public D/s - what is it? - 10/24/2006 11:40:44 AM

amaidiamond

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Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Watford / London
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sekhemet

Also in keeping with the comment about subjecting the poor vanillas to Our sexuality - excuse Me but I find their sexuality disgusting and I am subjected to it all the time and all over the place. Are the Same Sex couples also "subjecting the poor vanillas to exposure," or are they exempt from this ... hideous abuse perpetrated upon society, by whom - US?
Right ... ok. D/s is in the same boat as that was 20 years ago, the only difference is they got acceptance in the past 20 years, and we're still hiding in closets looking for it in dust piles, and among ourselves. THEY took the world on by the horns and they won ... They dominated, we submit ... How cute.
I don't need to be asked for consent from people who are kissing, and oddly they never ask the entire room if it's ok to do it, if anyone might be offended ... or if it's immoral. Why are you so scared to do something you claim you consider to be alright?

I'm not attacking anyone - I'm simply suggesting; Perhaps it's time the hand was forced and that accpetance was demanded on the part of a community who likes to profess a higher intelligence than the norm, while cowering in community closets, filled with like minded souls.
These two worlds overlap, and the lines are only drawn and instilled where chosen and one side or the other enforces it - The same as with all worlds and communities. Their world - is ours, and until they say we are NOT welcome in it - here have a space - it is the only world we have, skirting the outside of it doesn't change the fact we're still fully within it.

XxoxX

I had to reply to this, sorry if I'm hijacking the OP's post.
For me that has NOTHING to do with *Subjecting the poor vanillas to our sexuality* That is not why I am more subtle in public places, I am neither in the closet or unhappy with what I am, I am active in the London scene and well known and far from hiding away, You are right in that this world is also ours, and it is, and so we behave in a way that is acceptable in this world, I see no problem at all with a D/s couple kissing in public, or a gay copuple, vanilla couple, old couple, young couple or any combination of couple, I see no problem with affectionate guestures, soft touches, low words, basically my point is we do not see a vanilla couple in the street having sex, we do not see a vanilla guy fingering his girl whilst sat in a bar, these are things that are not appropriate WHATEVER lifestyle you lead, yes I could crawl behind my Master down the highstreet, yes i could walk around naked jangling bells from tightly clamped nipples, the reason I do these things is not a divide between D/s and vanilla, it is because certain things are not appropriate for in public REGARDLESS of your lifestyle.
In all honesty if I'm in a cafe enjoying a coffee I would be equally upset to see a girl being bent over a table and having a butt plug inserted as i would to see a couple kick off their shoes and have sex across the table, I am a very open minded person however if I wish to see these things or be surrounded by them I go to a club or fet night, although I believe that tolerence to D/s being raised is only a good thing I don't believe being involved in D/s gives us an automatic right to flout ourselves.
Sorry for the rant.

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RE: Public D/s - what is it? - 10/24/2006 11:55:23 AM

DoctorDubious

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

Fast reply....
I don't think the sensibilities of the vanillas is of any importance whatsoever. Nor do I buy the idea that I somehow need their consent to be the way I am in front of them.

There are laws in place in every jurisdiction that dictate what is and what is not acceptable behaviour in public, and as long as you are abiding by those laws, then go right ahead, lead your slave down the street on a leash,

I bet its 100% legal, and if some vanilla doesn't like it, to fucking bad, tell them to get the law changed.

Greetings all exhibitionists and privateers....

Speaking of laws,
here in California it recently became illegal
to tie up your dog (or any domestic animal) for more than 3 hours,
either in public OR in private....

Seeing as most vanilla-folk wouldn't agree that your sub is a "domestic animal"
I think us bondage-tops are in the clear.

DD, a knotty old goat, keeping up on the laws....

(in reply to Arpig)

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RE: Public D/s - what is it? - 10/24/2006 12:13:36 PM

ToGiveDivine

Posts: 650
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Is this really a lifestyle thing? I don't want to know what my neighbors are doing behind their closed doors. (whether they are the most vanilla or the most kinky)

Then there are other people that you would wish would not do anything in Public (Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob sucking face on the Red Carpet comes to mind - yuck)

Then there are the occasion you catch people "spicing it up" in an elevator, park bench, whatever ... I don't mind that so much as long as they aren't actually trying to get caught.

For BDSM, I think whatever you do in private is your business; if you doing things in public to make a scene, then that's inappropriate; but if you are doing something discretely in public and happened to get caught, oh well it happens.

If you have a need for attention of others outside of your private abode, go to a BDSM event of some sort and just stay within the rules.

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RE: Public D/s - what is it? - 10/24/2006 1:13:36 PM

charismagirrl

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Joined: 8/30/2006
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First i'd like to address the thing about vanillas or same sex couples kissing in public...i personally feel that this is a weak analogy to draw. M/s & D/s couples are as free to kiss publicly as the next couple but you don't see the vanillas or same sex couples throwing their sexuality at ppl in public by engaging in missionary position on a table or two lesbians going down on eachother or a gay male couple engaging in anal sex- IN PUBLIC. Maybe, just maybe, one of those "disgusting" vanillas you saw kissing in public was an M/s couple (could happen).

In my relationship with my Daddy i'm so not in the closet, much in the ways others have described. i also think NOTHING of wearing my collar (even the one that is rhinestoned with an O ring) out in any public venue. i am my Daddy's slave every minute of every day and the little details of our relationship make that so. We do "bring it out of the house" in a more overt way when i may just wear a skirt that is shorter than some would find comfortable, [paired with a top that is tighter and smaller than some may appreciate and underneath have on no panties (since they aren't allowed). my Daddy loves that i look obnoxious and tht ppl look at his slave, but it isn't a premeditated thing.Conversely, he may also have me wear a big sweatshirt and baggy pants. The choice is his and we really don't think of what others are going to think beforehand, we just do what he chooses.

We also engage in mad PDA and have even had a sweet little old lady approach us once and say something about being so deeply in love. (so although it appears to be vanilla, it's more an M/s thing because i was ultra conservative about PDAs before my Daddy)

All that being said, we also don't try to push what we are( as M/s) into ppls faces....Family gatherings etc. ppl ALL know what we're about but we don't need to have me kneel at his feet or wear the most obvious collar to prove to them what we are.

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