Woman's Gift of Intuition

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Woman's Gift of Intuition - 2/5/2005 5:32:36 AM

mistoferin

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I think that as a woman I can say that women have a gift of intuition that helps us with all of our personal interactions. Men tend to see what is presented and not read between the lines in the same way that women do. This is not a slam on men, only an observation.

For example:
Sir and I were going over messages here on the board and I noticed He sees the words written and bases his answers/opinions off of exactly that. When I pointed out to Him in certain instances that someone was being "catty" for example, He had not picked up on that aspect of it. As women, we KNOW when we are being "catty" even if we pass it off innocently. He also did not see that sometimes someone can ask one question, but if you look closely you can see that what they are really asking is something different, or just seeking validation.

Another example:
When I am crying over something that has effected me emotionally, not necessarily lifestyle related, the men in my life have always tended to get very flustered and wanted to just "fix" it. They never seem to understand that sometimes crying is just a good thing and that it doesn't necessarily mean that something is broken. They seem to just try to do whatever they can to make it stop, when sometimes all that is needed is a big hug and permission to cry it out.

I am not discounting the fact that over time we get to know each other very well and this becomes less and less of an issue. That is not what I am trying to address. What I am trying to address is the basic difference between the ways that men and women read people's thoughts, feelings and emotions. It may come from the fact that women tend to be more "emotionally" based and men more "technically" based.

My question is - Do female Dominants feel that they have a bit of an edge because of intuitions, and do male Dominants ever feel that this is an area that they have to work harder at than their female counterparts?

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~erin~

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When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

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RE: Woman's Gift of Intuition - 2/5/2005 7:44:48 AM

Moleculor

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quote:

Another example:
When I am crying over something that has effected me emotionally, not necessarily lifestyle related, the men in my life have always tended to get very flustered and wanted to just "fix" it. They never seem to understand that sometimes crying is just a good thing and that it doesn't necessarily mean that something is broken. They seem to just try to do whatever they can to make it stop, when sometimes all that is needed is a big hug and permission to cry it out.

That's definitely -not- intuition. That's a fundamental difference between large portions of male and female populations. Men like to solve problems. They see a problem, they go to solve it. A woman (typically) does not have this drive, so of course she isn't going to try and fix a problem if some other woman is crying. That's not intuition, that's just doing what they'd want other people to do for them.

quote:

My question is - Do female Dominants feel that they have a bit of an edge because of intuitions, and do male Dominants ever feel that this is an area that they have to work harder at than their female counterparts?

Ptht. My sense of intution is most certainly fine, thankyouverymuch. And I've known at least three women that it nearly took a 2x4 to drive home a few points, so women definitely don't have a monopoly on intuition.

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RE: Woman's Gift of Intuition - 2/5/2005 8:33:07 AM

sub4hire

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quote:

My sense of intution is most certainly fine, thankyouverymuch. And I've known at least three women that it nearly took a 2x4 to drive home a few points, so women definitely don't have a monopoly on intuition.

Myself being of the female persuasion. I don't get it either. Yes, from time to time I do see the written word differently that Doug does. I will admit that. However, I see the written word different than most people male and female. So, that to me in my mind doesn't justify any differences other than I am different than most people.

I've never been one to cry. If I do it is because something has hurt me. Terribly. Where I've done my research I do know crying heals the soul. It has never been something that I've personally felt better after doing.

So, I guess in my idea. People are people, Everyone is different. I don't see one sex having an edge over the other. I mean, how do you explain the gay man who has been gay as long as you've known him. Only he has known the last 2 year's. Should he be classified as a female because he has been more girlish than you your entire life?
Hehe...yes I know that is off topic. Sorry I don't have an answer to your question.

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RE: Woman's Gift of Intuition - 2/5/2005 8:51:47 AM

mistoferin

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Ok....maybe giving examples was a poor way of trying to convey what it was I meant. I just know that in my interactions with people, my actions...or reactions...to them are influenced by those intuitive little feelings that I get and not necessarily based just upon the information presented. Nine times out of ten those feelings end up being pretty much on target.

I have heard many times in talking with other women that they get the same types of feelings. I have not however, heard many men state the same. Possibly it is that women are more closely in touch with their inner voices, or that we tend to disqualify less often.

I was just wondering if female Dominants see this as an advantage in dealing with their submissives.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

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RE: Woman's Gift of Intuition - 2/5/2005 11:07:23 AM

Moleculor

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

Ok....maybe giving examples was a poor way of trying to convey what it was I meant. I just know that in my interactions with people, my actions...or reactions...to them are influenced by those intuitive little feelings that I get and not necessarily based just upon the information presented. Nine times out of ten those feelings end up being pretty much on target.

I have heard many times in talking with other women that they get the same types of feelings. I have not however, heard many men state the same. Possibly it is that women are more closely in touch with their inner voices, or that we tend to disqualify less often.

Or perhaps it's because men simply don't put things into so many words, or don't like to admit to such things, or don't process it in quite the same way.

However, your first paragraph describes me quite well.

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RE: Woman's Gift of Intuition - 2/5/2005 11:34:16 AM

domtimothy46176

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I see that men and women often relate to emotional upsets in very different ways and varying level of empathy. I can and do intuitively understand what emotional travails others may be enduring but I have a much more pragmatic way of looking at things than my girl does. I'm much more inclined to suggest that someone "suck it up", learn from the experience and carry on than offer a shoulder to cry on. To some that may make me an insensitive jerk but it still remains the best advice I've ever received.
When it comes to the message boards, OTOH, I do tend to reply to the question, as asked. It may be a male trait or may be more closely related to how I communicate. In person I tend to watch body language and tonal inflection very closely in determining nuances. In text-based environments I tend to rely rather more on the communication skills of the poster to fully grasp whatever subtext may exist.
Timothy

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RE: Woman's Gift of Intuition - 2/6/2005 12:47:59 AM

BeachMystress

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

I was just wondering if female Dominants see this as an advantage in dealing with their submissives.

I'm very intuitive. This isn't from being female per say, it is my personality type. My sub is very close to my personality type and is also quite intuitive. I do find that my innate understanding of people and situations does help in dealing with them. I've found this to be an advantage in dealing with subs in the past. I find it to be almost magical with my current sub, as he understands me as well as I understand him.

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RE: Woman's Gift of Intuition - 2/6/2005 1:14:05 AM

liljoy

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ahh this reminds me of how i've always dealt with things when they were too painful to face. i've always "sucked it up and got on with life" on the outside i refused to let anyone see i was hurting. If i spoke of it, it was more like i was telling someone elses story than my own.

i'd insist to anyone that asked that i was fine right up to the point that i would explode. i was widowed at 28 and for six months i "sucked it up" i refused any and all help from friends and family because i was "fine". Until six months later when a friend sat me down and made me face my feelings durring lunch at work (her intentions were great her timming sucked lol) i don't think i have to tell you i didn't get much of anything done the rest of that shift. i did little else but cry for the rest of the week. It was good for me to finally face those feelings and deal with them instead of denying them

Still to this day i am the queen of denyal. If i don't write them out i hold the negative emotions in until i suddenly over react to something. Then Master and i have to sit down and sort out what it is i'm trying not to deal with.

To me this is a weakness but it's something that has been a part of me for as long as i can remember. Growing up i was punished if i expressed anger, saddness or frustration. So i really don't know what the healthy way is to express those feelings.

lil_joy

quote:

ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176

I see that men and women often relate to emotional upsets in very different ways and varying level of empathy. I can and do intuitively understand what emotional travails others may be enduring but I have a much more pragmatic way of looking at things than my girl does. I'm much more inclined to suggest that someone "suck it up", learn from the experience and carry on than offer a shoulder to cry on. To some that may make me an insensitive jerk but it still remains the best advice I've ever received.

Timothy

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RE: Woman's Gift of Intuition - 2/6/2005 7:31:57 AM

happypervert

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I've seen shows on gender differences with research showing that there is a woman's "intuition" that picks up non-verbal cues so that women can respond to the needs of infants. This is the sort of thing that is part of the human species and has been selected as desirable from a Darwinian perspective. So it does exist at some level; however I don't recall that that any woman can respond equally well to the needs of any infant, so I wouldn't assume can just read people better than men.

Also, I think it is an axe that cuts both ways because some women like to use their "intuition" to justify believing any wacky idea that comes into their heads. I'm sure the men out there have been through the following scene at least once: Your woman asks "What's wrong?"; you reply "Nothing" because there isn't anything wrong; then she proceeds to keep asking because she "knows" from her intuition there is something wrong when the only thing wrong is her making a nuisance of herself by continuing to ask about it.

Basically I think the question is one that simply can't be answered, because women can only say what they feel and can't compare it to the intuition of a man or that of another woman.

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RE: Woman's Gift of Intuition - 2/6/2005 7:39:59 AM

proudsub

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Right now my "women's intuition" is telling me if i don't get my ass off this chair and make His breakfast i'll be in deep trouble.

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"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

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