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Doms and Daddy Doms - 11/29/2006 7:56:16 AM

LotusSong

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How long has this "Daddy Dom" phenominon been around? I had never heard from it before CM and I've been around the scene since 1994.

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RE: Doms and Daddy Doms - 11/29/2006 7:58:23 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong
How long has this "Daddy Dom" phenominon been around? I had never heard from it before CM and I've been around the scene since 1994.

Interacting with your non-biological father in a fatherly way in intimate relationships has probably been around since we started forming what the concept of "father" is.

It's definitely been around long before 94.

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RE: Doms and Daddy Doms - 11/29/2006 10:41:24 AM

emdoub

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Pat Califia edited a collection of stories about it, called _Doing It For Daddy_ - published in '94. It was a fairly hot topic back then - but has probably been happening since they figured out what caused babies.

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RE: Doms and Daddy Doms - 11/29/2006 10:44:41 AM

charismagirrl

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my Daddy/Master has been in the scene for about 20 yrs or so and most of it he has identified as a Daddy Dom and prior to identifying as such he acted as a Daddy Dom. So it has been around for atleast that long

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RE: Doms and Daddy Doms - 11/29/2006 1:37:20 PM

Archer

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Daddy boy relationships in the gay leather community have been around for a very long time plenty of old porn books that have used the terms for a format of a power exchange relationship. It started to make the jump from the gay/lesbian community to the hetero community back in the mid 90s but had been used for a long time before that in the Leather community.

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RE: Doms and Daddy Doms - 11/29/2006 2:38:42 PM

LotusSong

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Archer

Daddy boy relationships in the gay leather community have been around for a very long time plenty of old porn books that have used the terms for a format of a power exchange relationship. It started to make the jump from the gay/lesbian community to the hetero community back in the mid 90s but had been used for a long time before that in the Leather community.

I was familiar with this aspect. Just the het version I wasn't.

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RE: Doms and Daddy Doms - 11/30/2006 12:13:51 AM

reofbl

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I was a Father back when I was a little guy, and long before I knew what BDSM was. It's probably what led me to the path that came here on this community.

Strange, too. I keep going back to it. A female I own often becomes a daughter, if she's been a slave. Actually, come to think of it, it almost always seems to invert, from starting with one to moving to the other.

It's a form of relationship I'm fond with. With my daughters, I'm sure to empathize that the Father/daughter relationship isn't explicitly sexual, or even romantic. It's another aspect the relationship takes on, such as how a vanilla married couple may also be best friends.

I won't generalize on the subject too much since I draw, for the most part, solely on my own experiences in this area. Still, it's worth mentioning, I see a "Daddy" role as more.. loving, nurturing, protecting. When I own a slave, she's to do as ordered. She's taken care of, but allowed far more indepedence. A daughter is typically encouraged to be more dependent, not pressed away. It makes for a closer relationship, though I'm sure many would frown at the codependence.

The term "Daddy Dom", though.. is this to imply most "Daddy"'s are Doms in the respect of being dominant, or in the respect of being more specifically "Dom" (as opposed to being a Master)?

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RE: Doms and Daddy Doms - 11/30/2006 8:00:15 AM

Daddy4Princess4

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I also had the same type of experience with a neighbor girl. We would play "house" in which we were the parents, with dolls and pets and such. It always seemed to morph into her being the little girl, calling me daddy and wanting to sit on my lap. We were probably 7 or 8 when it started.

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RE: Doms and Daddy Doms - 11/30/2006 8:50:33 AM

juliaoceania

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I believe you are talking in the formal lifestyler type sense if Daddy Doms have some sort of pedigree? I am unfamiliar with the gay leather scene, but much of the BDSM community is leather oriented, adopting many rituals and protocols from the leather community... why would this aspect be any different from the rest?

I will say that there is an aspect to this sort of dynamic that is an archetypical one. Even in modern times women get "sugar daddies", someone that will care for them, praise them, adore them, and someone they can please... just like they pleased their real father. It is a natural fit for a power exchange, because the "sugar daddy" controls the purse strings, and the young woman must please him to continue to be "his girl".

I think this psychological power dynamic of patriarchy is very deeply rooted in the psychology of many men and women. I do not age play, but I do have a Daddy, and I have to say it is a very natural sort of power exchange, probably dates back to Neanderthal

.

I have no knowledge of the historical roots of the BDSM world, nor do I really care to be honest... our evolutionary history has a much longer pedigree than the lifestyle does... just some thoughts.

It is not uncommon for women to call their vanilla mates "daddy" ..btw

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 11/30/2006 8:51:59 AM >

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RE: Doms and Daddy Doms - 11/30/2006 4:57:18 PM

DreamWizardNJoy

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We were just discussing this in our Yahoo group. We've seen a number of people, especially women who seem to crave this dynamic, including us to a degree. One thing i was hoping to see more of was specific links or organizations. Are there some? What resources would you recommend?

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