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[Poll]

State So on the Public Forum?

17% (5)

State So in private?

10% (3)

Ignore the wrong and continue to do it?

0% (0)

Ignore the wrong and dont do it again?

0% (0)

Block the person whom has done wrong and dont expect an apoligy?

0% (0)

Leave the Forum

35% (10)

Address the issue in public so that it is not committed by others?

35% (10)

Total Votes : 28

(last vote on : 7/26/2005 6:21:52 PM)
(Poll will run till: -- )

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

. - 2/14/2005 5:54:25 AM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

< Message edited by MistressDREAD -- 2/21/2005 6:19:48 PM >

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Post #: 1

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/14/2005 6:03:24 AM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

It was not My intention to wrong any
Moderators nor break any rules that
had changed in My absence. My apolgy
to any Moderator whom felt wronged by
Me in My stance, and Ill not post any
pertinate information concerning My
lifestyle here again in full and will only
add half of what I desire to be read
by those whom desire the information
in the future. Really having growing
pains One arnt cha? How about stating
what the cost is for the expanded use
and if I desire to post something that
takes up space I can pay for it to be
placed. When Our Information has to
be regulated in how We now post it
that was not a part of how things were
done in the past, it takes away something
that was good about this site and what
has made it what it is to this point in
My opinion. Again My Apoligies if Ive
wronged any Moderator as it was not
My Intent.

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

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Post #: 2

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/14/2005 7:38:16 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

It was not My intention. . . .

"Not My intention", is the rationalization of almost every wrongful act. It was not the intention of the arsonist to kill the family sleeping next door to the factory he was burning down. It was not the intention of man celebrating the 4th of July who shot a gun in the air to have the bullet land in the body of neighbor. And I'd bet it's not the intention of any drunk driver to kill a family when he/she gets behind the wheel of their car when driving home from the bar.

Those are three examples of what can happen when rules aren't followed. Similarly all these consequences don't necessarily happen ALL the time. But they can. It's the point of having rules/laws. CollarMe is no different. 99.9% of the time breaking the posting rules have consequence to no body but the poster and those that posted afterwards, and the worst case is that people's time was wasted. In this case, a valuable resource, Moderator Four was lost to all of us. I know, "it was not your intention".

quote:

How about stating what the cost is for the expanded use and if I desire to post something that takes up space I can pay for it

This is an amazing parallel to the drunk driver who wants to pay a fine or, if rich enough, pay large restitution to the family in lieu of prison. I guess it's another admission of guilt but refusal to accept responsibility or consequences. Well, that's acceptable in US society today. The world is full of enablers and why shouldn't CollarMe follow the trend.

The damage is done, and no juvenile poll will replace the loss of Mod4.

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

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Post #: 3

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/14/2005 12:25:06 PM

proudsub

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

Welcome back MistressDread. I know in the past a lot of complete articles have been posted and i too was not aware there was a rule not to do that except in the "alternative lifestyles in the news" forum. So i checked to address the issue in public so others won't commit it. I would hate to see you leave the forums as you have a lot of valuable knowledge and experience to share.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

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Post #: 4

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/14/2005 1:46:05 PM

onceburned

Posts: 2117
Joined: 1/4/2005
From: Iowa
Status: offline

quote:

So i checked to address the issue in public so others won't commit it.

This makes sense. I am not sure of the exact nature of the offense in question. If it were against an individual then a private apology might suffice. But a public apology covers many bases - personal feelings, community perceptions and as Proudsub mentions, making the public aware.

(in reply to proudsub)

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RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/14/2005 3:18:30 PM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

actually My offence was " that I found out a week later" is that I posted a article that was 3/4 of the whole article and I was informed after the fact that NOW there is a rule that no full articles can be posted here anymore, any where. This rule changed while I was gone and when I returned I was not made aware of it till after the fact and I had been banned. Now The fact is that I cannot break a law I am not aware of and I requested to know what law I had broke from ALL MODS since I had been banned and dident know the reasons why. In the past year I have broke many rules and in doing so have been informed as to what I did wrong and informed of My being banned which I had no issue with since I am quite use to breaking laws that do not make sence to Me and paying the price honorably however in this particular case the same proceedures that had been used in the past were not used this time and I inquired as to why. I dont drink so the temp to assocate Me with a drunk driver is idiotic. Im not into fire so associating Me with an arsonist is again idiotic. And to tempt to associate My posting of 3/4th of a post as equal to killing is well completly stupid. I am an extreamist and a nonconformist, a Sadist and a humiliationist. Not many with in My Alternate Lifestyle like this nor accept this but this IS still a part of Our Lifestyle and calling Me insane, well the whole vanilla world feels that anyone that is here and a part of this lifestyle is the same as you call Me, Insane so befor you are the first one to pick up a stone and throw it, ask your self what is it you are throwing at........ Why has Mod4 left? I havent a clue and dident know that they had left till You just stated such Merc. I was apoligizing to MOD1 actually not MOD4. I say if You cant stand the heat of the kitchen get away from the pot. Oh and by the way, My tempt to post words of wisDom on My Lifestyle Merc was NOT a wrongful act. It was simply a post done much in the same way I have posted posts here for over a year now. It is not My fault that the rules changed in My absence and no one stated such as I returned nor even wrote to inform Me as I have been in the past that I had done wrong or had been banned till I found out on My Own. I will always respond to something addressed to Me especially by a Moderator and what I think is that a Moderator that bans Me then makes a comment to Me on the boards when they know I cannot respond to it is the rather wrongful act. And I corrected it in My Own way. If that is the reason that MOD4 left because they realized after the fact THEIR wrong well................. not My issue...DREAD

< Message edited by MistressDREAD -- 2/14/2005 4:03:06 PM >

(in reply to onceburned)

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Post #: 6

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/14/2005 3:41:11 PM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

МIŞŦЃΞŞŞ ÐREÂÐ§™ MÎ§§.WRÎTÎÑG§ o====·.,¸,.-·<

PRESENTATIONS TO FIT THE AUDIANCE
A NON CONFORMISTS VIEW

THE EGO AND ATTITUDE OF BARRIERS,
WHICH FIT NO CASUAL FORM OR FASHION,
TAKE A AUDIANCE OFF THEIR GUARD,
IN PRESENTATIONS NOT DESIRED.
BUT REMEDIAL IN THEIR ACTIONS,
FOR A END THAT WILL MAKE ONE THINK,
JUST WHAT ARE THE DIFFERANCES,
AND JUST WHAT ARE THE SIMALARITIES,
THAT MAKES US A NONCONFORMIST OUTCAST?
WE ALL OF BDSM HAVE EGOS AND ATTITUDES,
AND ARE NONCONFORMISTS NOT POLITICALLY
CORRECT OR REVEARED BUT FEARED.
A ALPHA, THE BEGINNING OF ANYTHING,
BE IT THE BONDAGE OF MIND,
THE DOMINANCE OF SEQUENCE.
THE SADISTIC DISPLUME AND PLUNDER.
THE MASOCISTS FLAGELLANT.
PRESENTATIONS OF THOUGHT OF ONE.
ONE AS IN FIRST, ONE AS IN SINGULAR
ONE AS IN ALPHA.
МIŞŦЃΞŞŞ ÐREÂÐ™®©7/2004

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

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Post #: 7

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/14/2005 3:56:12 PM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

The damage is done, and no juvenile poll will replace the loss of Mod4.

Damage?
Juvenile?
My post has no intent on replacing MOD4.
My post that was removed did no damage.
At the average age of most anyone here
being over the age of 18 Id have to say that
no question posted here is juvenile, only the
answers that SOME MODs gave to the questions.
If MOD4 chose to leave this place I had no
action in it. Do You really think Merc n beth
that I have any control whatso ever over this
MOD4? I dont, so dont tempt to throw any
misguided guilt My way for the actions of
MOD4 sits squarely on Their shoulders not mine.
Get Your facts straight BEFOR tempting to throw
shit. I havent even a clue what was posted
in the area addressed about My self and only see
that things had been said and removed and I
havent a clue what they were, being as I just returned
here today and have been gone a week. Anybody
got a copy of just what was said that I can read
so that I actually know what just took place in
My absence?

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

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Post #: 8

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/14/2005 6:16:49 PM

DiamondDiva

Posts: 266
Joined: 10/10/2004
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

Welcome back Mistress Dred

_____________________________

~Diamond Diva~

" When someone is telling you who they are LET THEM!!!

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

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Post #: 9

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/15/2005 8:12:11 AM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

ThankYou proud and Diva~

Im still back and forth and it looks as tho it will be for a while.
Its good to know tho that even when Im gone I can seem to
get in trouble here with out even putting forth any effort. LOL!

(in reply to DiamondDiva)

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Post #: 10

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/15/2005 11:06:52 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

Dread,

quote:

I cannot break a law I am not aware of

If you believe this, someday you'll end up in jail.

It would disappoint me if any Dom/me I respected refused to accept consequences to their actions inversely proportionate to their experience. Respect to rules is what I am all about, I thought the same of you. Is your offense as serious as those I sited? Of course not. When making points in an argument I find it best to be dramatic. But the comparisons were illustrative, and your 'punishment' warranted and appropriate, was also not as intense as the drunk driver's. However the consequences of you not accepting your one week ban were dramatic to this site.

Once you got a response from the Moderators and there was a rule broken did you accept it and their decision or did you whine about it and keep arguing until you got it handled in a way acceptable to you? How would you treat a submissive who told you they didn't read all the rules and say to you that they shouldn't be punished? Better yet, what respect would that sub have for you once knowing that whining can avoid consequence? Respect and trust is a coin that can only be spent once.

I agree that the situation is symptomatic to CollarMe growing pains but shirking your part is just a rationalization. Amazing as it may sound, fundamentally I am in COMPLETE agreement with you. Censorship should be fought anywhere it's encountered and especially at a lifestyle site as this. But as we agree to participate freely, we agree to the rules set by those giving the time, effort, resources, and money to keep the site going.

quote:

Id have to say that no question posted here is juvenile, only the answers that SOME MODs gave to the questions.

So everyone is wrong but you. How can that be debated?

Also, per your request, I happened to save my post to the thread you referenced that had been pulled. I don't feel it appropriate to repost here, but I sent it to your direct mail.

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

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Post #: 11

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/15/2005 12:48:09 PM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

However the consequences of you not accepting your one week ban were dramatic to this site.

I find it interesting that You know that I had a one week ban when even I hadent a clue that I had a ban first off Merc much less a week of it and second, Who said that I dident accept My punishments if and when I have done anything wrong? Ask MOD1 if I have not taken My punishments each time I broke a rule most times letting the MODS know ahead of time that I will be breaking such rules. HOWEVER this time I had no clue I had broke anything untill after I had been banned for how long I dident have a clue nor had any email directed to Me to even inform Me that I had done wrong as I had been given each time over the past year if a wrong had been committed. Again I will state Merc that Your tempt to slant My Good name with issues that I Myself am NOT yet aware of or have even read yet is in its self pittiful. Ill forgo all the rest of the comments You have made to these posts that I have yet to read and made privvy of about My self. ThankYou for sending Me what was posted I will go now and read them now. DREAD

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

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Post #: 12

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/15/2005 3:42:45 PM

ModeratorThree

Posts: 949
Status: offline

Actually...

It was a two week ban, and M4 did not issue it, I did.

The ban was for reasons that have not changed. On the day I issued the ban you had bumped no less than 9 threads with a smiley face. Something that was addressed to you back in December. It disrupts the flow of the board. You also were involved in a few flames back and forth between another poster. But the main reason I banned you was due to bumping threads, as you were asked prior not to do. Also the article you posted was the full article that I also recieved via a chat list I am on.

For some reason you did not get the email that I sent you in regard to your ban, still looking into that one. I do know as fact you have been sent email from not only myself but other Mods that you have not bothered to read. It is easier to say you did not get the memo when you don't open the letter I guess. I can say that you did not, for whatever reason get my letter informing you of your temp ban. And it is for that reason only that your ban was lifted. I do believe we are still reviewing a few things and are in the decission process as to what we are doing about the situation.

You knew better about bumping threads, as we went over this just recently with you. And the threads that you chose to bump were not even relevant to any current conversations on the boards. In fact some of them were off topic and seemed like random bumps for you.

In the past we have agreed to disagree Dread, I have no personal issues with you. While I may not always agree with you I have never once made anything on this board personal with anyone. If I find myself in a position where I feel it best dealt with by another so that it is clear there are no personal opinions or feelings involved I pass it to another Moderator. I work very hard to keep my own thoughts or feelings out of this forum.

Mod4 is no longer here, and it is a sad loss. There have been issues in the past between yourself and Mod4, and I guess this was the last stroke. I cannot say for certain any or all the reasons M4 left, but do know they are gone.

What I find odd here is that you have started a thread in regard to the entire event. Almost a play at more attention it would seem.

The reasons I banned you are as follows. With the primary issue being the first, bumping old threads.

Bumping old threads, with a smiley face. You had no further input to the discussion you just bumped them .. some of them a year old

Posting phone numbers in the forums. Please share them via email if need be. I realize these were numbers of munch groups. However, some people that organize and run these groups do so from their homes, and I personaly would not want my number on a public board as such. This would, to me, seem like common courtesy.

Posting a full article, due to copyright laws, we need to only post snippets or parts of the original and a link to the original.
This holds extremely true if it is a news article. I have read most of the essays written by the author you posted, and I realize her work is sent out via hundreds of groups.

In the past you have touted on how you do bend the rules if not break them, it is something you seem proud of. So be it. And I am in agreement, you do in fact see how far you can push things ... most of the time. I think it gives you some sort of pride to know you are pushing limits. It seems to be a part of your nature. And thats fine, it is afterall who you are. We have a few here on the boards that do the same.

As far as apologies go, I don't owe you one. Had the email gone through as it should have, you would at this moment be under a temp ban and the issue would be moot. Just goes to show, even our mail messes up from time to time, the members are not the only ones who have mail issues.

As far as this entire thread goes, I find it rather silly and attention gathering.

This is the first and the last time I have spoken on the issue, I have said what I needed to and if anyone has any further questions feel free to email me on the other side.

Mod3

< Message edited by ModeratorThree -- 2/15/2005 3:47:52 PM >

_____________________________

/ If it were me I would ask for a refund.

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Post #: 13

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/17/2005 3:03:06 AM

jillwfsub4blkdom

Posts: 375
Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline

Dread,
Sounds like Mod 3 explained things very well not that the entire forum even deserved an explanation. Sounds like you had been warned about things but continued to do them. So to me the consequences would have been known. i question why the need to make this public because in the end it just seems to not put you in a very favorable light.

jill

_____________________________

"It's the moment that transcends
Our physical into a more spiritual level of understanding" - Musiq

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

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Post #: 14

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/17/2005 9:57:19 AM

strongnsubmissiv

Posts: 197
Joined: 9/8/2004
Status: offline

I didn't see the "Couldn't care less" option to click.

:P

sns

_____________________________

*** Strong and submissive are not contradictions ***

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

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Post #: 15

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/17/2005 5:56:49 PM

stef

Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline

It's the little "red hand" icon in the lower left corner of her posts. I recommend it *highly* to anyone who wishes to avoid a dreadful experience here.

~stef

_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to strongnsubmissiv)

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Post #: 16

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/17/2005 6:13:19 PM

strongnsubmissiv

Posts: 197
Joined: 9/8/2004
Status: offline

OMG stef, i swear i've never noticed that before until you mentioned it. How long have i been here? lol

sns

_____________________________

*** Strong and submissive are not contradictions ***

(in reply to stef)

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Post #: 17

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/19/2005 9:56:57 PM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

I do know as fact you have been sent email from not only myself but other Mods that you have not bothered to read.

Thankyou MOD3 for Your explaination as I have just read it and went back to My mail just now and checked it once again for You or any other Mods mail and I dont see what You are talking about as I have every bit of mail Ive ever received here and there is not one email from a Mod which has been over 6 months now that has not been read. And as for My smilie faces please show Me a post here from january 1st 2004. You will find that it is no longer here for anyone to read much less other posts that I feel have some value to items lifestyle related. If the post is hit and brought back up to a current post it is not lost. Thats My reasons for smilie faces and My justification of why I on occation use them. As I have said befor there really is a method to My madness and I know many whom would not understand My reasons nor insite or feelings on the issue. You have stated that MOD4 had issues with Me however I havent a clue what those where as I am not privvy to the Moderators discussions nor have a clue who MOD4 was and alltho I am sorry to see any MOD go, I will not be held responcible for another adults actions. If MOD4 left that was their choice not mine and their reasons. Remember there is a reason that this area is named what it is MODS and You really dont have to take things so serious. I know I dont and can diss with the best of em if need be........

(in reply to strongnsubmissiv)

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Post #: 18

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/21/2005 10:15:32 AM

ModeratorThree

Posts: 949
Status: offline

Your mail account was checked, you have 4 unread from me and 2 from ModOne.

Mod3

_____________________________

/ If it were me I would ask for a refund.

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

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Post #: 19

RE: How Should MistressDREAD apoligize or be apoligized... - 2/21/2005 10:36:03 AM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

I just checked My mail again and this is whats in there all the way up to the beginning of the year so I dont know who you are sending mail to but it is obviously not to Me and Mine: I havent had a MOD contact Me at My EMAIL since 2004.......... please correct Your oversite MOD3

mantis65 New
2/20/05 4:19 AM
healthyme
2/19/05 2:27 PM
carleh2003
2/18/05 1:33 PM
camaroman
2/18/05 12:21 PM
camaroman
2/18/05 12:18 PM
winker3
2/18/05 8:32 AM
camaroman
2/17/05 10:17 PM
shylittleheart
2/17/05 5:17 AM
camaroman
2/17/05 0:58 AM
tantula
2/17/05 0:44 AM
0
2/16/05 6:42 PM
camaroman
2/16/05 4:54 PM
tantula
2/16/05 12:38 PM
carleh2003
2/16/05 12:28 PM
tantula
2/16/05 12:25 PM
tantula
2/16/05 12:08 PM
camaroman
2/16/05 10:37 AM
shylittleheart
2/16/05 5:18 AM
camaroman
2/15/05 10:34 PM
carleh2003
2/15/05 8:01 PM
Mercnbeth
2/15/05 7:42 PM
carleh2003
2/15/05 7:26 PM
carleh2003
2/15/05 6:26 PM
carleh2003
2/15/05 6:16 PM
carleh2003
2/15/05 5:54 PM
carleh2003
2/15/05 5:53 PM
strongwilledmale
2/15/05 5:19 PM
MasterR
2/15/05 5:10 PM
carleh2003
2/15/05 5:10 PM
Mercnbeth
2/15/05 4:12 PM
Mercnbeth
2/15/05 1:44 PM
proudsub
2/14/05 9:38 PM
bornaslave
2/14/05 8:57 PM
bornaslave
2/14/05 3:41 PM
proudsub
2/14/05 12:40 PM
bornaslave
2/11/05 5:04 PM
rebecca2
2/9/05 11:52 PM
bornaslave
2/9/05 6:58 AM
bornaslave
2/9/05 4:00 AM
LadyPain
2/8/05 5:58 PM
seeksowner47
2/7/05 10:43 AM
LadyPain
2/6/05 9:35 PM
proudsub
2/6/05 6:34 PM
proudsub
2/6/05 6:27 PM
seeksowner47
2/6/05 6:10 PM
exnihilo2002
2/6/05 4:48 PM
LadyPain
2/6/05 1:02 PM
LadyPain
2/6/05 12:48 PM
LadyPain
2/6/05 12:32 PM
finemale7
2/6/05 11:12 AM
oria
2/6/05 9:18 AM
FromItaly
2/6/05 8:27 AM
slaveboyforDomme
2/6/05 7:31 AM
bossinAMsubinPM
2/4/05 10:36 PM
givemeachance
2/3/05 8:36 AM
scopius
1/31/05 9:11 PM
guidogorgonzola
1/31/05 9:02 PM
scopius
1/31/05 9:00 PM
orangecountysub
1/31/05 8:53 PM
scopius
1/31/05 8:46 PM
orangecountysub
1/31/05 8:35 PM
scopius
1/31/05 8:29 PM
guidogorgonzola
1/31/05 8:26 PM
guidogorgonzola
1/31/05 8:26 PM
paulbryan40
1/31/05 9:46 AM
MOJO8
1/29/05 10:59 AM
MOJO8
1/29/05 10:59 AM
proudsub
1/24/05 11:37 PM
captainblack
1/24/05 11:19 AM
dolfan40
1/24/05 8:19 AM
male2005
1/23/05 10:22 PM
captainblack
1/20/05 9:05 PM
badboy441
1/9/05 11:56 PM
StraySlave
1/7/05 8:19 PM
naulitboy
1/6/05 8:11 AM
Rebecca
1/5/05 10:55 PM
Rebecca
1/5/05 10:27 PM
SirSTRYKER
1/5/05 9:43 PM
SirSTRYKER
1/4/05 11:26 PM
MBH20607
1/4/05 8:37 AM
rinny1000
1/2/05 11:26 PM
rinny1000
1/2/05 11:26 PM
darkpetal
1/2/05 10:36 PM
darkpetal
1/1/05 12:47 PM
BluesMate
12/31/04 1:12 PM
secretslavej
12/31/04 5:52 AM

(in reply to ModeratorThree)

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