RE: Submissive training

RE: Submissive training (Full Version)

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jblack -> RE: Submissive training (12/12/2006 10:03:09 PM)
While I was interested in reading all the different responses to the word "training," I'm wondering if someone might be able to offer information on this idea from a logistical viewpoint. Usually, I love semantic debates, but I've been talking to some Doms who mention "training" and want to have a better idea of what to expect. For instance, I might express interest in a certain act makes me especially nervous, which elicits a response like "that'll become easier with training." Okay, that makes sense. Usually, things do become easier with training. However, I have no idea as to what such "training" might entail. Obviously, everyone has different styles, and there won't be any definitive answers. But I would be interested in learning what people have used as "training" methods to get a sense of what might happen within a scene. And I'd appreciate any advice on how to talk about this topic with prospective Doms. Questions like "what's your training style" seem to act like beacons to HNGs, and I'm sure that there has to be a better way to glean such information, even if I have no idea how to do so. Is anyone willing to share what "training" methods they've used or experienced? And how did people discuss "training" when they began their relationships?

Archer -> RE: Submissive training (12/12/2006 10:30:41 PM)
Since most people who train submissives/slaves have only one or two at a time to train the design of the training can be made very personal to take as much of the person being trained into account as possible. (ie If I have 40 people to train to a standard then one style/ method of training might work best accross the spectrum of the 40 people, but if I have 2 people to train to the same standard then the method might change so that the standard is met more quickly since only two people have to grasp the subject matter.) That ios a basic of any education or training plan. Personally I have found that unless I really know pretty well how I want something done trying to train someone to do it is pretty futile. So first you have to identify what you want the person to be trained to do. This is where the argument of non cross over and the bane of having to retrain tends to come into play. However when you actually take time to find the things you want to train the person to do with thought towards the important things comming first, and the "fun stuff comming later" then you find many things that you can train folks for that will make most cross overs to eventual owners. Several of these things were mentioned by ownedgirlie on page 2 "Training on focus, training on organization of time and effort, training in critical thinking and logic, training on, dare I say it, personal hygeine, training on effective communications skills, All of these will transfer reasonably well between different owners, how the skills are applied may differ but having the skill set and the tools in the toolbox certainly will make the cross over.

BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Submissive training (12/12/2006 10:35:24 PM)
quote: Is anyone willing to share what "training" methods they've used or experienced? And how did people discuss "training" when they began their relationships? For myself, when I've done something that may make my boy nervous, we do the following: a) talk about the desire/expectation, and sometimes my reason for wanting to do it; b) I explain the act/procedure step by step including the potential for fun/complications/problems; c) we do it slowly with me reassuring him things are going well, and without a gag for him to be able to speak up if something feels horribly off; d) we discuss how he/it felt... Than there are those times I say "just shut up and do." [:D] M

ownedgirlie -> RE: Submissive training (12/12/2006 11:00:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Archer training on, dare I say it, personal hygeine It's funny, I was so OCD about personal hygeine that I had to be trained to handle not being squeaky clean at all times. I agree with what you said - training (as I experienced it) is very personal and individualistic, and can take intense work.

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