quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress

not only are they normal, they are expected, and a good dominant will utilize yours feelings of neediness, and sexual ache, and desire for intimacy as a tool to craft your submission.
 
the idea is, that every action has an equal reaction,

many of the more effective techniques of training actually have roots on NLP neural linguistic programming, POW breaking techniques, Parenting,
Sociology, Animal husbandry and Psychiatry.
 
but basically you are being trained...training is in essence the same weather the being is a dog, a horse or a human....establish trust, set boundaries rules and limitations, be the only access they being has to a favored reward, and then you have the full attention of your subject and can more easily mold them to your will..
 
be consistent, use repetition and keep some secrets as to the game plan....keeping you off balance is a very effective tool.
 
after a while you are trained. you know what he expects and you no longer mess up...this brings you great joy, your natural submissiveness has been effectively harnessed and utilized in a way that nourishes you both...
 
this will come after a time, and in that time there will be tears and fears, trials and tribulations, ...and then one day....seeemingly out of the blue....peace...
 
sure the relationship will grow and evolve...but you no longer can be thrown off center...you have no fear of this man no matter what he does....this is a great mile stone...
 
but also a sort of sad one..because the butterflies in your belly at all times is a great feeling too....and as i always recommend to n00bs to savor it as long as you can

quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U


Perhaps it is not a desire to not have your company but an attempt to spare both of you from questions he's not willing to deal with. Part of being an adult is realizing that we don't always get what we want, even from those that love us. This throw the baby out with the bathwater approach seems less than appropriate. Either he sees me because I want it or he doesn't love me. Are you sure that this function is one where your presence would be appropriate or do you just want his time for yourself?

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHugs

Dear dawntreader, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
I am a firm believer that both Dominants and submissive/slaves a like need physical contact.
 
If there is a time where there is forced gaps between physical touch and scent and or voice; I can assemble a package where I will put something I have worn into it, as to open when needed just to feel me through an article of clothing or something else...like jewelry, shoes, etc.  It is that article that is a part of me that is there which will trigger the mind, as the power of scent and feel can do a lot.
 
Phone calls.  Letters and notes, now days E-mail.  Having the slave maintain the rituals and routines will also help.  In my absence, it is also a great opportunity to get the house in 'inspection' order; white glove inspection.  Things like rolling the carpet up, having it sent out for a good cleaning, rewaxing the floors and such.  Major repairs, painting rooms and such can keep a slave busy while not there.
 
I will admit, the first thing I wish to do when I meet my slave, is to embrace them with all the emotions I have to offer and be grateful I had a faithful slave to return to.  Such a blessing.
 
Just some thoughts.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

quote:

ORIGINAL: Petruchio

I won't requote everything LadyHugs said, but I agree.

quote:

ORIGINAL: acctonthelook

my needs were never being met.  i realize he was training me, but i am too needy of his attention to deal with being last on his priority list. 

he said he'd make time. his actions said different. 

he said he was a man of his word and he was not like all the rest, he failed me.