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Training? Punishment? - 2/21/2005 4:12:40 PM

Knewitallalong

Posts: 7
Joined: 2/18/2005
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Hello again,

In my effort to learn the intricacies of this lifestyle I have yet more questions. I have heard the words training and punishment used quite often around here and in profiles but am having trouble defining them in the context of a D/s or M/s relationship (which is ultimately what I am striving for). I mean they sort of look the same but obviously are different in some ways (I hope that makes sense). Of course punishment or discipline are rather easy to a degree but the 'training' word is what I need the most help with. But give me examples of both if you would.

I know they say the only stupid question is the one you don't ask, and this even sounds a bit stupid to me, but I want to be crystal clear on some things going in.

Oh, and BTW, I've already received some messages, which is quite exciting.

Thanks

K

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RE: Training? Punishment? - 2/21/2005 4:22:10 PM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
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The answers on both accounts will be very varied.

Training could be as simple as a Dom teaching a sub to prepare foods the way He likes them prepared or cleaning the house the way He wishes it to be cleaned to training their sub in a specific sexual activity He enjoys or in pain tolerance. There are too many things one can be "trained" in to list.

Punishment is obviously the consequence for some kind of infraction and can range from standing in a corner, writing thoughts, time alone to think, being denied contact up to but not necessarily including something physical as in a non sensual spanking, whipping or some other unpleasant physical sensation applied.

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~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

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RE: Training? Punishment? - 2/21/2005 4:35:51 PM

Gemeni

Posts: 255
Joined: 2/19/2005
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Training means learning to do things the way I want them done.

Discipline is part of the reenforcement of training,(ie, correction and redirection of minor mistakes to do better)

Punishment is a last resort, when I feel someone is either slacking, or needs something more intense to help her memory.

It's never to correct outright defiance-if it's gone that far,you are probably going to be released.

< Message edited by Gemeni -- 2/21/2005 4:37:49 PM >

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RE: Training? Punishment? - 2/21/2005 4:56:16 PM

Knewitallalong

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Joined: 2/18/2005
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Ok, that's pretty much what I thought but I was defining it in different verbiage to myself, just needed to see it stated in a different way I guess.

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RE: Training? Punishment? - 2/21/2005 4:57:05 PM

EmeraldSlave2

Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
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Training is simply behavior modification. You do something and you train yourself to do something differently, or something new.

Punishment/discipline is one method to do this. There are lots of others, including rewards. Not every relationship employs punishment or even a lot of training. Some relationships find it a huge fetish in and of itself.

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RE: Training? Punishment? - 2/21/2005 9:02:25 PM

slavedesires

Posts: 669
Joined: 3/2/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Gemeni

Training means learning to do things the way I want them done.

Discipline is part of the reenforcement of training,(ie, correction and redirection of minor mistakes to do better)

Punishment is a last resort, when I feel someone is either slacking, or needs something more intense to help her memory.

It's never to correct outright defiance-if it's gone that far,you are probably going to be released.

So succinctly said.
"outright defiance." a concept that most of us have probably done with our parents as teenagers. am glad they did not deny me.
would i do it now? never! as adults we take responsibility for our own actions and bear the consequences.
is willful disobedience the same as defiance?

shy

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RE: Training? Punishment? - 2/21/2005 10:11:31 PM

NATI

Posts: 177
Joined: 1/5/2005
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quote:

is willful disobedience the same as defiance?

Is the sub being disobedient because something scared him/her and made the sub balk? Can a sub be disobedient without necessarily being disrespectful or even outright defiant? Sure she can. Is that something I would tolerate? Nope. But part of correcting and punishing is finding out 'what happened, and why it happened'.

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RE: Training? Punishment? - 3/3/2005 3:49:52 AM

MistressJadeMTL

Posts: 168
Joined: 12/18/2004
From: Montreal, Canada
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Greetings,

Each D/S relationship is unique, however in My stable, I train My new submissives through a variety of techniques' the principle one being teaching through example. (I primarily own service-submissives.) I show them what foods I enjoy and how to make them the way I like them... I show them exactly how I like the linen to be folded... I explain and show them exactly how I want the household to be cleaned and maintained. The second time I have them do it themselves with Me watching and overseeing, and after that they are on their own but I do check on them and correct as necessary.

I primarily use praise as a reward for new subs, and subtle approval such as a gentle pat on the head. New subs may also be rewarded for particulary good service with a suitable "treat", such as being allowed to bathe or massage my feet (if they have a foot fetish).

I reserve "play" as the ultimate reward for My regular submissives who have worked hard to earn a place in My stable. I always make use of "play worksheets" to negotiate hard limits, likes/dislikes, etc. Even if our playtime may include various forms of corporal punishment; it is something *they want* to experience and they will only get it if they earned it.

After all, can one truly physically/emotionally punish somebody if they love being beaten, whipped or humiliated? (Although there are ways, I prefer not to lower Myself to those techniques.) Also there are some subs who purposely push the limits of their Dom/Domme in order to *get* punished and I find that defeats the entire purpose.

Any sub's misbehaviour, incorrect actions, etc. are punished through the distinct lack of "rewards". They get no further attention from Me, no praise, and no further time spent in service within the household. A major infraction would mean restriction or denial of any future playtime and even possible release from My service.

So far, this system has worked extremely well for Me, and my subs always are clear on My expectations of service and the rewards and punishments that will result from their actions.

Hope this particular unique example might prove helpful to you...

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~ Mistress Jade Dragon

HeadMistress - FemDomme Society of Canada: http://FemDommeSociety.ca
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