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RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 3:39:47 AM

Aileen68

Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Wulfchyld

Everyone has been poking at it (in a fashion) so lets get to it.

1. Is sex married to your BDSM practice or what?
Always

2. When you have sex in a BDSM setting is it different than other settings?
Yes, most definitely.

3. Do you still have strait up Nilla sex?
Yes

4. Do you have sex with full, part time, or sometime sub/slaves...D's
Part time dominant

If I missed anything please expand the list.

Edited to ad the D's

(in reply to Wulfchyld)

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Post #: 21

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 5:27:52 AM

twicehappy

Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
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1. Is sex married to your BDSM practice or what?

Hmmm...well Scooter and i cannot get through a scene without sex. Actually we are bad, often we start a scene get horny and the scene goes out the window because like a pair of rabbits who just ingested a prescription bottle full of Viagra we just gotta do it NOW!

I think we are well matched in that, lmao, badddd.......

2. When you have sex in a BDSM setting is it different than other settings?

No, same as where we scene, we have sex sitting, standing, laying down, in the bedroom, the bathroom, the office. Horny rabbits remember.

3. Do you still have strait up Nilla sex?

Oh yeah! Though i do not think even missionary style can be catagorized as vanilla for us because the M/s is always there.

4. Do you have sex with full, part time, or sometime sub/slaves...D's

All of us have had sex with each other. Sex is a family group only thing with the exception of Mistoferin but she is family, hmm, like a kissin cousin.

< Message edited by twicehappy -- 2/4/2007 5:32:39 AM >

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Post #: 22

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 6:15:15 AM

catize

Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
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quote:

1. Is sex married to your BDSM practice or what?

Master and I have well-matched sex drives so a lot of WIITWD is combined with sex acts.
There have been some occasions where I was so high on the endorphins that the play was satisfying to me and I didn't need the sexual aspects. When that happens he lets me rest and recover for several hours before we engage in sex.
In my opinion, BDSM is not all about sex. Sex is when a person inserts something into another's body somewhere. BDSM or D/s or M/s is a head space. We don't have sex when I'm folding his laundry or washing his dishes or serving him a drink, but it can be just as satisfying because it is my submission to him.

quote:

2. When you have sex in a BDSM setting is it different than other settings?

Not sure what you mean by settings, but sex is much more intense for me if pain play is involved.

quote:

3. Do you still have strait up Nilla sex?

Once in awhile I long to be caressed rather than pinched or slapped, aroused slowly with a soft hand rather than a cane, called pretty names rather than the nasties.

< Message edited by catize -- 2/4/2007 6:25:22 AM >

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Post #: 23

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 6:57:44 AM

Wildfleurs

Posts: 1650
Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Wulfchyld

Everyone has been poking at it (in a fashion) so lets get to it.

1. Is sex married to your BDSM practice or what?

Currently with my owner yes (for us its a privilege that I earned so it wasn't always the case years ago).

quote:

2. When you have sex in a BDSM setting is it different than other settings?

No. But then again we don't have sex at BDSM settings.

quote:

3. Do you still have strait up Nilla sex?

No, our sex always contains control, bondage, and/or pain.

C~

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Post #: 24

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 7:02:19 AM

Celeste43

Posts: 3066
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From: NYS
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We're into bondage not s&m and it is very sexual to us. Most of the sex is vanilla, since it includes no toys and the rope bag still in the back of the closet. The setting is the same for both, the bedroom. We're monogamous and D/s. As far as vanilla vs BDSM sex, I don't see a difference except for positions.

(in reply to RavenMuse)

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Post #: 25

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 7:19:47 AM

gandalf0297

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Yes,No,Yes,Yes

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Post #: 26

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 7:47:30 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy
Hmmm...well Scooter and i cannot get through a scene without sex. Actually we are bad, often we start a scene get horny and the scene goes out the window because like a pair of rabbits who just ingested a prescription bottle full of Viagra we just gotta do it NOW!

We have a code for that- one of us looks at the other and goes "Did I divert your plan?" in an innocent sweet voice.

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Post #: 27

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 7:50:51 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
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1. Is sex married to your BDSM practice or what?
"BDSM practice" is sex to us. It meets all criteria for sex even if the one activity more common to define sex doesn't occur. Our BDSM activity is intimate, erotic, emotionally involved, and sexually charged. It is from that perspective that we don't participate and aren't attracted to "casual BDSM". It is our opinion, that intimacy of a BDSM experience is sexual and is sex.

2. When you have sex in a BDSM setting is it different than other settings?
Our BDSM "setting" is portable, it is carried in our mind. The physical surroundings do not matter and do not play any part. We may use "props" or take advantage of our surroundings, there was this great rock waterfall in a hotel we stayed, but if it were made of ceramic the sex would have been no different.

3. Do you still have strait up Nilla sex?
"Strait up?" - No. Our mental inter-dynamic precludes that from happening.

4. Do you have sex with full, part time, or sometime sub/slaves...D's
We don't know. Anyone we choose to share ourselves with intimately is a person. We know them from our experiences with them. Obviously we don't live with them, we don't know them as we know each other to establish if this life is a full time obsession or a weekend distraction. We do know them and trust them to the point of including them in what we consider an intimate act. Again, that may or not include conjugal sex. The intimacy of me using a flogger on someone or beth being the recipient of hot wax by another, to us, is considered equivalent.

(in reply to Wulfchyld)

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Post #: 28

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 7:51:51 AM

michaels4evr

Posts: 184
Joined: 8/8/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Wulfchyld

Everyone has been poking at it (in a fashion) so lets get to it.

1. Is sex married to your BDSM practice or what?

Yes, even when there is no touching or penetration, both being on the bottom and the Top is extremely arousing to me, therefore it is sexual or in most cases sensual. This occurs whether or not I am sexually attracted to the actual person. When Master and i actually have the time and privacy to "play" you better believe sex is going to happen, whether we are at home or at an event (where sex is allowed).

Now if you are talking about non-physical activity of BDSM practice, I would say even in those insistances for me it is sexual..I consider BDSM to be my sexual orientation..even when I'm serving in non-sexual ways I become aroused, focused and peaceful..mental and emotional orgasms all over the place..

2. When you have sex in a BDSM setting is it different than other settings?

Not really, it just depends on the venue and what equipment is available..for instance we don't have a cage at home, but at an event, He might take me from behind through the cage bars....yum-O!

3. Do you still have strait up Nilla sex?

If you mean missionary, gazing into each other's eyes and making slow passionate love..not really..we probably would if we had the opportunity to actually "do it" more..but with our limited time..when we have the chance its usually with all the elements of BDSM as we can muster at the moment. LOL ..straight up 'nilla sex to us is like the thing we do when we are in the mood for something "different". I guess a lot of folks in the life are inverted that way..

4. Do you have sex with full, part time, or sometime sub/slaves...D's

We don't have any slaves or submissives at the moment, but if we did and were in a committed relationship with them whether full or part time we would probably have some sort of sex with them. It just really depends on the energy between everyone, desires and needs.

If I missed anything please expand the list.

Edited to ad the D's

-michael's

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Post #: 29

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 7:56:13 AM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
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Define what You mean by "sex", please.

(no, really.. to some it's lusting in your heart.. to others it's doing the deed.. and Americans are still wondering if oral is actually 'sex')

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Post #: 30

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 7:57:41 AM

mnottertail

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Joined: 11/3/2004
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No sex please, we're British.

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Post #: 31

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 8:11:34 AM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
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No sex please, we're British.

Ahhhhhhh, thats why i'm not getting any !!

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Post #: 32

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 8:17:03 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Wulfchyld

Everyone has been poking at it (in a fashion) so lets get to it.

1. Is sex married to your BDSM practice or what?

No but then I'm more focused on either Ds or on artistic topping.

quote:

2. When you have sex in a BDSM setting is it different than other settings?

Setting?
Do you mean partner or dynamic?

When Tom and I have sex, its about mutual pleasure but given our personality I'm still pretty much in charge.

When Fox and I have sex, it's about my pleasure first and foremost. I am concerned about Fox's pleasure but he gets the most joy out of just pleasing me it seems. I'd be a fool to complain too much about that I think.

quote:

3. Do you still have strait up Nilla sex?

I don't know what this is other than it lacks a Ds dynamic or the use of certain types of equipment.

quote:

4. Do you have sex with full, part time, or sometime sub/slaves...D's

Because the exchange body fluids involve inherit risks of disease and pregnancy, I only have that type of sex with someone I have been in a relationship for some time and with whom I have a committment to make the relationship continue forever.

I do not trust condoms as protection as much as I trust myself.

Other types of sex depends on my level of attraction to the other person and theirs to me. It might be because I'm a childhood abuse survivor but I do not have sex of any type with someone who does not consent 100% and I never expect that consent to last forever.

quote:

If I missed anything please expand the list.

Edited to ad the D's

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Post #: 33

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 9:10:56 AM

Lorelei115

Posts: 1933
Joined: 8/16/2006
From: Sin City
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1. Is sex married to your BDSM practice or what?
Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't. A little while ago I said ALL my bdsm practice was purely for sex and kinky thrills, but I've been exploring the non-sexual side of it lately, which is turning out to be very interesting to me.

2. When you have sex in a BDSM setting is it different than other settings?
Not really. I and my partner can be in many moods in either setting and that will affect the sex. I've had the most gentle, tender sex imaginable as part of a scene, and I've had the roughest, leaving bruises, sore in the morning sex in a purely "vanilla" setting.

3. Do you still have strait up Nilla sex?
Yes. Although I think there is power exchange in every kind of sex.

4. Do you have sex with full, part time, or sometime sub/slaves...D's
All of the above, depending on the relationship with them.

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Post #: 34

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 9:26:35 AM

Missokyst

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I enjoy sex however it is defined. BDSM, romantic, ravishment, makeup sex, ect. Sex is great.
BDSM can happen anywhere and in any way, just as regular sex can. I have never needed a setting or tools for either. <g> But I have enjoyed tools for either, just because it is more sex.
I love Nilla Sex.
I don't have sex with sub/slaves, but I have had sex with dominants and people who may have thought they were nilla.. at first.
Kyst

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Post #: 35

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 9:36:07 AM

afeathr

Posts: 248
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From: Southern California
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1. Is sex married to your BDSM practice or what?
      No. I serve in a regular capacity without any sexual gratification from it. We incorporate BDSM type activities into our sexual life, but I am submissive in all aspects (except work) and he "wears the pants" (literally).

2. When you have sex in a BDSM setting is it different than other settings?
     If you mean in a club - I wouldn't know. I've never had sex in public (well, not strictly true but not "formally) nor have I done any BDSM community activities with the exception of the occasional "shopping" trip. Sir and I are not really motivated to do such. Now... we do have "sessions" (though almost always in our bedroom - we have a roommate - though when we get our own place we are going to design a dungeon for play) and when we do, they are very different from the day-to-day.

3. Do you still have strait up Nilla sex?
     Certainly - on a fairly regular basis. There is not always time, energy or patience to get into a "scene". In fact, we usually have 'nilla-type sex and save the scening for something special - or when we are both just dying to do so. However, we do integrate BDSM type activities even in our 'nilla sex time (spanking, physical control, etc).

4. Do you have sex with full, part time, or sometime sub/slaves...D's
     We are always on the prowl for part-time partners (female subs) to play with. When we get lucky we take advantage, but it doesn't happen on a regular basis (unfortunately).

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Post #: 36

RE: Sex - 2/4/2007 4:59:13 PM

LaTigresse

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MASTERSTEEL

Hanif Kureishi says, "After a certain age sex can never be casual. I couldn't ask for so little. To lay your hands on another's body, or to put your mouth against another's -- what a commitment that is!" So therefore sex is a commitment every time never so casual....STEEL

I thought this fit me so well I wanted to repeat it.

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Post #: 37

RE: Sex - 2/15/2007 2:47:04 PM

SATANMAN

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sex is part of my BDSM with my sub whereever we can.

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Post #: 38

RE: Sex - 2/15/2007 2:58:16 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Wulfchyld

Everyone has been poking at it (in a fashion) so lets get to it.

1. Is sex married to your BDSM practice or what?

Nah. We make love sometimes and do the whole gentle thing. We just tend to like it rough better.

quote:

2. When you have sex in a BDSM setting is it different than other settings?

Yes. In non-BDSM sex I'm generally not wearing various gags or having a spreader bar used on me. Also, Valyraen doesn't believe in calling me a whore during tender love-making :-)

quote:

3. Do you still have strait up Nilla sex?

Yup. Variety is the spice of life.

quote:

4. Do you have sex with full, part time, or sometime sub/slaves...D's

Ummm... we have sex with each other... he's my full-time dom and I'm his full time sub.

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Post #: 39

RE: Sex - 2/15/2007 4:45:46 PM

hereyesruponyou

Posts: 770
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quote:

ORIGINAL: reamer

1. Is sex married to your BDSM practice or what?

yes, no, sometimes......but i like when it is yes the best

2. When you have sex in a BDSM setting is it different than other settings?

Yes, more casual and fun for me

3. Do you still have strait up Nilla sex?

Yuppers, because between 4am - 7am i am not up to anything else, but still want it

4. Do you have sex with full, part time, or sometime sub/slaves...D's

Yes I do, But it doesn't mean i have to.... or that anyone should expect that

If I missed anything please expand the list.

1: do have have certain types of sex with BDSM'ers that you do NOT give to vanilla people?

OMG yes!!! nilla people won't let me bite

2: do you require bdsm "costumes" to feel as sexy and as erotically involved as you do simply naked or shirt off/pants or skirt down?

Costumes can add to a scene, but nothing is as comfortable as everyone in skin

3: have you ever played harder for someone whom was not your primary relationship rather than your primary relationship partner, due to how they "presented themselves" in PVC/Leather/Accoutrements?

no

(in reply to reamer)