|
TreSwank -> Food Poisoning Sucks - The Gift that Keeps on Giving (2/12/2007 2:57:51 PM)
|
It's now been two days since my harrowing encounter with Bacillus Cereus, but my sensitive little tum-tum is feeling the equivalent of post-traumatic stress syndrome...........a lingering vestige of my little pathogenic "pal" from a chicken salad gone horribly awry.
The workday grinds on like a Trail of Tears; I can feel the fecal slush being churned "centrifuge" style in my stomach. The pressure on my poor water-lily of an asshole is un-fucking believable, Ladies and Gentlemen. My menial security gig requires to traverse the equivalent of fifteen miles a day across an Indian gaming facility, but the whole time, I seriously feel like I need to spray a solid stream projectile of liquid shit across the floral-decorated carpet. I can only manage to hold it in by merit of sheer, animal willpower, taxed to the breaking-point.
It was only a week before, when my stools took the shape of dainty little "cumulus-cloud" clusters. Now, I spill brown river water into the company facilities. Oh joy.
My word of advice to the CollarMe public is to watch what you fucking eat, because food poisoning is the gift that keeps on giving. I might not be crouched over the john, wishing for death right now, but I'm still feelin' the heat at work. Make sure that meat is THOROUGHLY COOKED. I can't quite emphasis that point enough times.
|
|
|
|
