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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 12:00:06 PM

calicowgirl

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Thank you for the links LA. Informative, interesting and great help to a CM message board newbie.

Cali

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 12:01:01 PM

WldOne

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A-men Loraand master.... I think these women need to meet up with us. I love to make a woman squirt the most, but mulitiple orgasms are a great thing to watch when you happen to be the facilitator........

For the ladies out there that have never experienced an orgasm.....My heart felt sympothy.......

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 12:05:30 PM

calicowgirl

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For me the trouble came with years of medical problems that actually made reaching orgasm painful. After several fixer upper surgeries and one major, finally get it done the right way one, I am now like a new person whose quality of life is so much better.

Now my problem comes with getting my body up to par with my mind. It has been 5 yrs since physically things have been great for me and yet, it still takes me longer to orgasm than I would like and depending on stress etc, it doesn't always happen. I no longer feel like this is a failure of sorts on my part, I just go with the flow and enjoy what does happen. Since allowing myself that, I have been pleasantly surprised on many occassions.

Cali

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 12:05:31 PM

sweetnsensual

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quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

I have went through a few odd periods when it comes to orgasms. I rarely used to orgasm with a partner, although I could alone. I was extremely orgasmic, but I could not relax enough to orgasm with a partner. I was also easily aroused, and aroused by sex.

I've had the same problem for a long while. I've been able to orgasm by myself since...well I won't tell the exact age because I doubt people would believe me. Suffice to say--since I was very young. But when I'm with someone in any sense, even on the phone, I can't do it. I cannot seem to orgasm "in front" of someone else unless I have supreme concentration and commitment to do so. I've chalked it up to a trust issue. I've just done the whole supreme concentration and commitment bit.

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 12:14:00 PM

Mercnbeth

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quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysprop247
...have you ever heard of a woman masturbating in the way i described?

yes, although instead of both hands it could be Master's leg...

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 12:18:34 PM

daddysprop247

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysprop247
...have you ever heard of a woman masturbating in the way i described?

yes, although instead of both hands it could be Master's leg...

yes! i've done that in the past with a vanilla SO, but i had to put the pressure on his knee. anything softer doesn't work for me. but i am grateful to learn that i may not be quite as weird as i thought (just mostly lol).

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 12:23:04 PM

sweetnsensual

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when I first learned how and before the broken arm (which was in no way connected to when I first learned how to masturbate, just an FYI hehe) I used to do something very similar to what you did. On my stomach, both hands underneath me and stimulation on my clit. I still do that with my toy but now I'm on my back and I only need one hand.

I'll admit I haven't heard of a woman masturbate the way you do which isn't much because I haven't asked my girly-friends how they masturbate. One actually doesn't and never has. I don't think it's weird how you do it or out of normal. This may seem like it's been overly-said but whatever gets the job done, you know? If you really wanted to, you could "train" yourself to orgasm in different positions and in different ways besides the way you used to. That's basically what I had to do to move from the laying on my stomach with both hands to on my back with one hand and eventually to one toy and one hand. I still seem to only respond to clit stimulation. I've had intercourse with a man but each time, I haven't orgasmed. It's not something I'm really concerned with just yet because I figure I have some time before it's a real issue.

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 12:23:32 PM

pianogirl

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From: Alberta Canada
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quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysprop247

as an adult, it's been extremely difficult for me to reach orgasm. the odd thing is that as an UM, i masturbated to orgasm frequently. after puberty something just changed, not sure if it was one dramatic thing or a combination of factors.

From a health care perspective it is interesting that you mention the onset of puberty as an significant point in your sexual health. When looking at men who suffer from conditions such as impotence and p.e., (don't know if I can say that here - how about early squirt - lol) there is a correlation to decreased levels of testosterone. Although this is primarily a male hormone, it is one that is found in women as well. If you haven't done this already - it might be worthwhile to have your doctor check your hormone levels. It is a simple blood test and all three hormone levels can be determined.

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 12:28:51 PM

Mercnbeth

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quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysprop247

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysprop247
...have you ever heard of a woman masturbating in the way i described?

yes, although instead of both hands it could be Master's leg...

yes! i've done that in the past with a vanilla SO, but i had to put the pressure on his knee. anything softer doesn't work for me. but i am grateful to learn that i may not be quite as weird as i thought (just mostly lol).

oh yeah, definitely the leg BONE, knees work real well and then there was always laying on top of him grinding onto his hard cock--in a sweatsuit, for crying out loud...

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 12:41:20 PM

daddysprop247

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the thing is it doesn't seem possible for me to achieve any sort of stimulation through masturbation except in the position i described. being on my back makes it physically impossible to apply the kind of firm pressure that i need. i also cannot bear any direct contact with my clit...either from me or someone else. even touching the hood around it irritates me. it seems i need very firm, but very indirect clitoral stimulation, and any vaginal penetration just makes it nicer/easier.

but it's not something i consider a real problem, it just gets frustrating at times feeling different or "odd." also, since my Master occasionally loans me out to other Dominants, there have been a few who gave me a command like "make yourself cum" or "get yourself wet for me," etc., which for me is impossible, so that can be awkward. i also don't have any real longing to experience an orgasm...it's more something i think would be nice every once in a while, like a meal of spanish-style paella. so it's not something i ever strive for, hope for, or even think about during sexual activity, and it's not something that i miss because it doesn't happen.

my "issue" i think is most likely a combination of physical and psychological factors, the latter of which are not likely to ever be resolved. what i wish is that either somehow factors would change to the point where i experienced the slightly less rare orgasm, OR factors changed to the point where orgasm was physically impossible and 100% mentally undesireable, like with a fem. circumcision.

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 12:45:15 PM

starshineowned

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Greetings..~smiles~

When I was a unmentionable..I use to hang from a tree, and criss-cross my legs together tightening up the muscles in the upper leg and pelvic region. This produced a wonderful feeling but at a very tiring cost to achieve it. I also use to hang from the door knobs with my wrists, and rub up and down along the edge of it to achieve that same feeling..again with a cost of being very tired out, and pain to my wrists but I'd keep at it until I got that feeling. Didn't ofcourse know what that feeling was back then but figured it out soon enough.

As an adult..I get easily aroused with my own thoughts or certain talk from Master but seldom does physical contact alone work. I don't often orgasm with penetration, and when I do..It is weak compared to clitoral stimulus. I also can't orgasm by clit unless I am on my back, and legs straight out fairly close together. Any other position just will not do it. Also directly on the clit is a annoying feeling, and a turn off but just below and to the left or right works bingo magic.

Go figure

Well Wishes
starshine
Happy slave of Master Delvin

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 12:52:24 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysprop247
now that i've thoroughly embarassed myself.....how is it that you masturbate? or have you ever heard of a woman masturbating in the way i described?

I'm a standard masturbator, in fact any position EXCEPT standard missionary makes actually orgasming almost impossible.

But I've known frotteurs like that before who really enjoy it. I know at work I love putting my hand on my pants and pushing in on my clit and just grinding against it a bit. Nice friction.

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 1:14:32 PM

AZSweetie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysprop247
now that i've thoroughly embarassed myself.....how is it that you masturbate? or have you ever heard of a woman masturbating in the way i described?

I'm a standard masturbator, in fact any position EXCEPT standard missionary makes actually orgasming almost impossible.

But I've known frotteurs like that before who really enjoy it. I know at work I love putting my hand on my pants and pushing in on my clit and just grinding against it a bit. Nice friction.

Standard masturbator here too. i can get off very quickly masturbating but for some reason it takes me FOREVER to orgasm when with a partner. This is them doing the work. If i try to orgasm through masturbation in front of them i can get off quicker but still not that quick. i'm just really hard to orgasm in general, but i actually really like it that way because the orgasm is sooooooo much more intense once i've gotten there

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 2:14:36 PM

cjenny

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This is probably the closest topic to me. I can't cum, infact I have trouble even getting aroused. Sex has become something like reading a cookbook.. I can imagine the taste of the meal given the ingredients but that is all.
It IS due to medication, but I need the medication. It is actually a reason my LDR is so strong and has lasted so long, we only meet 3/4 times a year and I drop most of my medication for about a week before we meet. It doesn't always let me achieve orgasm but I do manage to finally feel that wonderful sensation of arousal.
My dom does not know I drop my meds & yes I am aware of the danger. I just don't know what else to do.
Since sex & arousal is so hard for me, and because of the medications effects it is almost like it is all just a memory.
I fucking hate it. If it were just one medication I could find a substitute but it is from several. Sigh. I don't even bother trying to masturbate, it is frustrating & depressing beyond belief.
Sorry that I went on and on, and I am sorry that I haven't anything to contribute..
I just needed to say it. He is due here in 10 days and I am really getting stressed out about it which sure doesn't help any.
Thanks for listening lol.
daddysprop, btw.. when I first started the meds & began having trouble orgasming I masturbated in the same way so no.. you are not weird

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 2:17:16 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: cjenny
My dom does not know I drop my meds & yes I am aware of the danger. I just don't know what else to do.

Make him aware.

You might have already posted about this, but why so few meetings and how long has this been going on? Are you actively working towards being closer?

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 2:39:01 PM

cjenny

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Why so few meetings? He lives in Texas and I am in Michigan, I am planning on moving to Texas this summer *if my house sells in this awful housing market*. We are working to get physically closer yay.
How long? Um I am unsure of how long towards what. He has been my dom for six years this month & I've had trouble acheiving arousal/orgasm for 5 years. I've struggled with Lupus and Fibro for about 10 years and the TMJ for nearly 30. The last few years I've gone from being able to physically do things in general ie work to becoming actually disabled.
As to telling him sigh LA.. he would tell me to not stop the medication. He would probably be appalled that I stop, he calls twice a day just to make sure I haven't forgotten them. I am careful to taper down, then slowly add them again. I don't just stop them cold lol my body would freak.
Yes I have mentioned it before, I'm sorry if I am being tedious. I really haven't the RL support or people to discuss this with and I've seen that CM is okay with just about any problem or issue brought up. Plus it is much easier for me to talk to online strangers than to try and discuss this f2f with anyone.
There is a strong feeling of embarrassment shame & the feeling of being unviable.
R, my dom knows every facet of me except for this part. He knows I have trouble with it all but he doesn't know I drop some meds. I don't want him to know, I don't want him to worry any more than he does about me.
Finally dang it. I wanna cummmmmmmmmmm.

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 2:50:56 PM

StacyCat

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quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysprop247

yes! i've done that in the past with a vanilla SO, but i had to put the pressure on his knee. anything softer doesn't work for me. but i am grateful to learn that i may not be quite as weird as i thought (just mostly lol).

The wonderful think about the internet is that we can find all sorts of other perverts like us that do the same things we do! We are not so alone.

Now, would it be possible for you to do this, yet have your Master inside you? I like being taken from behind, and if my partner is long enough I can close my legs and lay on the bed and get fucked like that. It may not be too hard for you to be laying on your fists while he fucks you like that.

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 4:15:13 PM

curiouspet55

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Well, I know I'm a lot younger than most (nearly 19), and I'm a virgin so that plays a part. But, when it comes to orgasms, no matter what I try I can't make it happen. I don't know if it would work out with a partner, but by myself I'm at a loss. I can get aroused, but it comes to a certain point and dies off. Quite frustrating, really. Can't really figure out what to do about it, other than wait and hope that a partner could help me out without finding me frigid.

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 4:26:14 PM

GeekyGirl

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I had trouble orgasming when I first started masturbating (won't mention my age but I was barely into double digits).

I found that utilizing a pulsating shower head worked well, and after I had a few that way, it was never an issue again. I orgasm very easily, both from clitoral stimulation and penetration. I've also orgasmed easily from anal penetration.

I can probably count on one hand the number of times I've not been in the mood for sex when a partner suggested it , and all correlated to a time period when I was undergoing medical procedures involving my bladder or feminine parts (bladder therapy, my tubal, a biopsy, etc.)

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RE: Let's talk about orgasms - 2/14/2007 6:21:45 PM

MaryT

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quote:

ORIGINAL: curiouspet55
Quite frustrating, really. Can't really figure out what to do about it, other than wait and hope that a partner could help me out without finding me frigid.

It's very unlikely that you are frigid. A recovering Catholic, I went through my teen years thinking that everyone was crazy about all the sex stuff. I didn't believe women really orgasmed. It never occured to me to even try masturbating. When I was 17, my fiancee bought a "how-to" book (The Art of Making Love or something) and studied up. Then he gave the book to me and I studied up. It took a lot of work and probably a couple hours of effort from both of us one night, but the payoff was immense. Afterwards the only words I could get out were: "Do it again." It still took significant effort for a while, years, but it got easier and easier as time went on. Don't be discouraged.

Meds have been a problem at different times too. It's very frustrating to be so near and yet so far.

As to predicting, there were two days very recently when I thought an orgasm was out of the question. One was due to a very bad position, high heels, bending over and hanging on to the top wooden frame of a swivel chair while being smacked soundly with various things. Sweaty hands, poor balance, all that ended in the kind of fireworks that makes my toes cramp. The other time I was just overly tired anyway and had drank three beers ... I normally lose the ability to orgasm after just two. A quickie hog-tie and I was quickly in hog heaven.

MaryT

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