Equal-Opportunity and totally NOT "PC" Jokes... (Full Version)

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sensualmagirl -> Equal-Opportunity and totally NOT "PC" Jokes... (2/18/2007 7:51:26 PM)

I have a serious problem with generalizations... However, I got this list of jokes emailed to me, and since almost everybody you can think of gets picked on, I thought I'd share!  Enjoy!
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Equal Opportunity Un-PC Jokes

What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover ?
The position of the dirt bag


Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it. 


What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
Doughnuts? 


Why is air a lot like sex?
Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any 


What do you call a smart blonde?
A golden retriever. 


What do attorneys use for birth control?
Their personalities. 


What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
45 lbs 


What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
45 minutes 


What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife. 


Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism. 


Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends. 


What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you 


What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving. 


Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
Because they have cotton balls. 


What's the difference between a porcupine and BMW?
A porcupine has the pricks on the outside. 


What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
"Are you sure it's mine?"

Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
Mace will do that to you. 


Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia ?
Everyone has the same DNA.

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.

Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?
He walks around saying "Yo."

Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A different bar.

Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby?
They named him "Sum Ting Wong"

What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A speech impediment.

What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast?
They're hiring.

What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with... "a recipe".

How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F-word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..."
A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit"

Why is there no Disneyland in China ?
No one's tall enough to go on the good rides




MasterKalif -> RE: Equal-Opportunity and totally NOT "PC" Jokes... (2/18/2007 10:27:47 PM)

hahahahahaha pretty funny my pet, bordering on sassyness [;)]




YourhandMyAss -> RE: Equal-Opportunity and totally NOT "PC" Jokes... (2/18/2007 11:11:23 PM)

hehe yes, a nice wide smattering there, something for every one:D




rukna -> RE: Equal-Opportunity and totally NOT "PC" Jokes... (2/19/2007 1:25:04 AM)

"Sum Ting Wong"  :))




viperess -> RE: Equal-Opportunity and totally NOT "PC" Jokes... (2/19/2007 7:05:40 AM)

laughing...makes me proud to be southern born and raised.




HouseofBear -> RE: Equal-Opportunity and totally NOT "PC" Jokes... (2/21/2007 2:04:15 PM)

chuckles, I love the one about the blonde and the golden retriever




Missokyst -> RE: Equal-Opportunity and totally NOT "PC" Jokes... (2/22/2007 6:51:21 PM)

[sm=biggrin.gif]
LMAO.  Great jokes.  Is it ok if I post these elsewhere?
Kyst




sensualmagirl -> RE: Equal-Opportunity and totally NOT "PC" Jokes... (2/23/2007 4:24:25 PM)

Oh, yes, of course Missokyst... I got these in an email myself [:D]




WhiteRadiance -> RE: Equal-Opportunity and totally NOT "PC" Jokes... (2/23/2007 5:04:00 PM)

Oldie but goodie.  I think it is entitled Something to Offend Everybody.




PassionChemistry -> RE: Equal-Opportunity and totally NOT "PC" Jokes... (2/25/2007 6:27:50 AM)

very funny indeed




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