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"Event Drop" - 2/25/2007 10:37:38 PM

Posts: 961
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: This month? Maryland
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We've all heard of sub drop but I often experience a drop of a different kind. When returning home from an amazing event and a few intense days with the person I have come to consider my "other half" I find myself pretty sad and emotionally exhausted. I'm not asking if this is normal, I know it is, but I just wanted to talk about it a little bit and maybe ease some of the drop for myself and others who may also be experiencing it today after an amazing weekend at Southplains Leatherfest.

Feel free to comment even if you were not there this weekend. But if you were, and you want to reminisce and try to keep a little of that SPLF love going on through the coming days, feel free.

_____________________________

“These S&M people ... they are bossy! There’s also a creepy connection between leather sex, ‘Star Trek’ and the Renaissance Faire.”

- Comedian Margaret Cho

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/25/2007 11:01:13 PM

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Dear DominaSmartass, Ladies and Gentlemen;

In my mind's eyes it is --separation anxiety. In going to conferences and going with the intention of meeting people, re acquainting yourself with people met before--its much like a family reunion and or class reunion. Its a sense of mourning the physical interaction.

This is what I experience when going to conferences. I am just pleased that through modern PC's we (in general) can communicate more and ease the withdrawls of physical and spiritual connections.

Just some thoughts.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to DominaSmartass)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/25/2007 11:32:30 PM

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Joined: 9/8/2005
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He dips His lid,

Being an Aussie I can't speak on your leather event but I imagine it is two fold,
1. The seperation anxiety as pointed out by LadyHugs.
2. Dom/me drop. I have suffered this after play- the caring/protection of a connected sub, then their aftercare, then One has given and given energy and thought along with some pretty amazing planning at times, and hell- we shut down to replenish. This used to worry me but now I see it little different than doing some extreme physical work and pat myself on my back at the success of my results. Yes on the occassion when the 'scene' has not finished as expected- then I have to be careful about my drop.

Hope this assists,

Warm regards Driver.

_____________________________

Dance as though nobody is watching!

(in reply to LadyHugs)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 12:39:19 AM

Posts: 1992
Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Tallahassee, FL, USA
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i didn't have the wonderful opportunity to attend splf, but i can speak to having felt event drop many times, and not necessarily just at bdsm functions. i also experience it around some of my loved ones (especially around Him), but at special events as well. i feel this often after we have meditation retreats or other activities...i had a particularly bad case of event drop last year after burning bush, the local women's retreat (can't wait for it to come around this year!). i'm not really sure how to deal with event drop (or most kinds of drop, for that matter), so i think this is a great thread to have...maybe it will provide some coping mechanisms for those of us who seem to experience this often :) i think i tend to throw myself into whatever i'm doing so much that it's hard to not experience this drop after any intense happening in my life.

(in reply to DominaSmartass)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 12:51:49 AM

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From: This month? Maryland
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Yes, hisannabelle, you've got it right there. My drop experiences are not exclusive to bdsm events. And they really have nothing to do with play. It's more about being immersed in an intense environment where I can forget about the rest of my life and all the problems outside and focus on one issue, whether it is leather or not. I've been to spiritual retreats as well and certainly feel the same thing. By the way, is burning bush the equivalent of burning man? I love the name, lol. I wouldn't trade these weekend conferences for the world, I just wish that when I returned to normal life I didn't feel so rotten. The largest problem, I imagine, is that I know it will be another month before I see my *him* again and that's very saddening. On the other hand, each time we see each other it's like the first time all over again so I should consider myself lucky to have the longest lasting "new relationship feeling" in history.

_____________________________

“These S&M people ... they are bossy! There’s also a creepy connection between leather sex, ‘Star Trek’ and the Renaissance Faire.”

- Comedian Margaret Cho

(in reply to hisannabelle)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 1:00:42 AM

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my take on it is, when doing anything intensely fun, whatever it is, and its over, there is a bit of a let down, seems natural

(in reply to DominaSmartass)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 1:16:47 AM

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From: Tallahassee, FL, USA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass

By the way, is burning bush the equivalent of burning man? I love the name, lol.

i actually don't know anything about burning man, hehehe. burning bush is put on by we'moon spirit, our local women's center, and it's a clothing-optional weekend campout with dancing, chanting, drumming, spirituality and craft workshops/activities, etc. last year it drew about 50 people, was pretty amazing. now i'm going to have to go check out burning man to see what that's all about! :)

(in reply to DominaSmartass)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 1:28:55 AM

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He dips his lid,

To hisannabelle, In Australia we have an event called 'confest' http://www.dte.org.au/ held New Years and each Easter. Lots of workshops for all tastes. The admission charge of $70? (your 50$) plus 2 hours of voluntary labour gets one days admission or the full 7 days. Mud pools,fire twirling, body painting, wood fired sauna, free fresh water, and showers hanging off trees. Not BDSM at all but feudal/primitive with a makeshift village to match. with anything from 2, ooo to 3500 people, no aggro, no leering, no rednecks, all excluded. One gets a definate event drop returning to the real world- like just leaving the campsite and finding 'mobile phone' reception!.

Regards to all, Driver

< Message edited by Driver1961 -- 2/26/2007 1:30:24 AM >

_____________________________

Dance as though nobody is watching!

(in reply to hisannabelle)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 5:02:27 AM

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Joined: 1/30/2005
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Alas, I too am going through SPLF drop. Its a bit comforting to know I'm not alone in this. While its not depresion, its just kind of a blah, gee I wish I could go to more classes, wish it weren't over kinda thing. That and having to go back to work instead of smell leather really, really sucks!

_____________________________

Contrary to popular belief, slavery is not the path of least resistance.

(in reply to Driver1961)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 5:19:23 AM

Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass

We've all heard of sub drop but I often experience a drop of a different kind. When returning home from an amazing event and a few intense days with the person I have come to consider my "other half" I find myself pretty sad and emotionally exhausted. I'm not asking if this is normal, I know it is, but I just wanted to talk about it a little bit and maybe ease some of the drop for myself and others who may also be experiencing it today after an amazing weekend at Southplains Leatherfest.

Feel free to comment even if you were not there this weekend. But if you were, and you want to reminisce and try to keep a little of that SPLF love going on through the coming days, feel free.

From a different perspective, DominaSmartass, my own personal experience teaching my class frequently involves a significant drop that sometimes takes several days to overcome.

1) I get an adrenalin (post-adrenalin) hangover which is difficult to describe. I can be weepy, lazy, hyper energized, lonely, uncommunicative, whatever. What I do know is that what I am feeling is something I have no control over, cant really describe or explain away, and simply needs to be experienced until it is done. It is frequently over in 24 hours, but the week I spent up north took 4 days to recover.

2) The physical aspects of what I do result in endorphins to overcome the muscle fatigue and recover from the exertions. My body personally likes to be active when I am recovering from muscle strain. So I go for walks, go swimming, pick up jobs that require a lot of exertion in the harbor, etc.

3) I sweat a quart an hour so I feel pretty lousy if I dont drink enough water both during the class and for a day or two afterwards.

4) Depending on what happened in the class vis a vis the women's processing of their issues, I might or might not be emotionally pierced by some aspect of the class or something the women shared.

What I would suggest to the OP about event drop is to listen carefully to one's feelings, both physical and emotional, and think in terms of solutions or workarounds to enable recovery to take place.

Just me, etc.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle

(in reply to DominaSmartass)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 6:41:33 AM

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

Highs can come from many places. I'll experience the drop later today and tomorrow, especially from getting to be served by a slave I haven't seen in a year. Simply do all the things you'd do as if you were having Top Drop from a scene. Email me on the other side if you need someone to talk to. It was a great event and I loved seeing your BF getting out of the bondage. LOL

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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(in reply to DominaSmartass)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 6:47:53 AM

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Joined: 11/23/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Driver1961

He dips his lid,

To hisannabelle, In Australia we have an event called 'confest' http://www.dte.org.au/ held New Years and each Easter. Lots of workshops for all tastes. The admission charge of $70? (your 50$) plus 2 hours of voluntary labour gets one days admission or the full 7 days. Mud pools,fire twirling, body painting, wood fired sauna, free fresh water, and showers hanging off trees. Not BDSM at all but feudal/primitive with a makeshift village to match. with anything from 2, ooo to 3500 people, no aggro, no leering, no rednecks, all excluded. One gets a definate event drop returning to the real world- like just leaving the campsite and finding 'mobile phone' reception!.

Regards to all, Driver

Wow!! sounds like something i would like to experience :-) i wonder if we have something like that in the States?

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to Driver1961)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 6:55:41 AM

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Joined: 11/23/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass

It's more about being immersed in an intense environment where I can forget about the rest of my life and all the problems outside and focus on one issue, whether it is leather or not. I've been to spiritual retreats as well and certainly feel the same thing.

i can certainly relate to this as well... Real life almost seems surreal after such experiences. Like Sinergy said in his reply - i find intense physical activity to be my coping mechanism along with a good bit of "alternative rock" blasting in my ears! LOL!
Then after a couple of days - i go back in my memories of the event and am much more rational...it is also helpful talking with friends and acquantainces that were there as well :-)

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to DominaSmartass)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 7:05:24 AM

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Joined: 10/25/2005
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I've learned to take a day off after an event whenever possible to give myself time to "come back to earth." If I just try and go right back I end up feeling very angry and repressed.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to DominaSmartass)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 12:54:59 PM

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Joined: 1/30/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

I've learned to take a day off after an event whenever possible to give myself time to "come back to earth." If I just try and go right back I end up feeling very angry and repressed.

I think I'll remember that advice. I've been an angry bitch all day long. I left work early so that I didn't end up maiming anyone!

_____________________________

Contrary to popular belief, slavery is not the path of least resistance.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 1:20:50 PM

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Its normal after any huge event that you have been looking foword to comes to an end to experiance this sort of drop.. Its almost like morning its loss kinda like your sad its over. It happens with things like weddings and big partys, you spend so much time prepareing and then its over.. its human nature

Magik's slave

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.

-Rodney Atkins-

(in reply to cinnfulhussy)

RE: "Event Drop" - 2/26/2007 3:23:47 PM

Posts: 961
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: This month? Maryland
Status: offline

quote:

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

I've learned to take a day off after an event whenever possible to give myself time to "come back to earth." If I just try and go right back I end up feeling very angry and repressed.

I think I'll remember that advice. I've been an angry bitch all day long. I left work early so that I didn't end up maiming anyone!

Well, I've felt angry, sad, bitchy, and all the rest of it all day too but I tend to blame my job more than event drop. We'll see how the next few days go. LA, taking off is a great idea, just not an option for me.

_____________________________

“These S&M people ... they are bossy! There’s also a creepy connection between leather sex, ‘Star Trek’ and the Renaissance Faire.”

- Comedian Margaret Cho

(in reply to cinnfulhussy)

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