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looking for tips from women.... - 3/13/2007 9:43:06 AM

domahpet

Posts: 1505
Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Santa Rosa
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im just wondering, how would one learn to use a strap on effectively?

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 3/13/2007 9:54:13 AM

slave2yourwhims

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I'm not a woman but I would say practise makes perfect

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 3/13/2007 10:03:32 AM

BBBTBW

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I would have to go with "slave2yourwhims" practice does make perfect.

You want to remember not to go too fast until you have established how well your subject takes your strap on. To move too fast makes it painful for the subject and ackward for you.

Make sure the strap on is securely fastened to your harness and fits snugly against your body and position yourself and you're subject at heights that are conducive for comfort as well as effective stroking.

If at first you don't suceed, try try again.

If you are going anal, please use LOTS and LOTS of LUBE

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 3/13/2007 10:31:14 AM

MasterFireMaam

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From: Charleston, WV
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Just like you learn any other technique: There are lots of resources that you can find to read. Then, you also have the option of finding a mentor who is willing to show you how it works with a willing volunteer. Finally, doing it yourself, using the knowledge you have, is required.

Master Fire

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 3/13/2007 11:17:49 AM

hereyesruponyou

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Buy a good thick anal lube and if your partner is inexperienced start with a small dildo would be my suggestion. Make sure to put a condom on the dildo for easy clean up!

I found having a really good fit on the harness helped alot

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 7/8/2007 6:44:08 AM

LilyRedd

Posts: 20
Joined: 3/18/2007
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Go slowly.
Allow for your partner to become used to the strap on longer than if you were using a real 'tool' since you will not actually feel their tenseness.
Don't exit too far. Definitely the number one issue with a newbie to strap ons. They pull out too far and then there is the bumbling and jamming that can injure and annoy.
Stop and readjust your straps til they are confortable. After you've used the same one a few times you'll know your prefered strap settings.
From there it's just practice, practice.

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 8/14/2007 10:47:01 PM

fungasm

Posts: 321
Joined: 8/2/2007
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I thought about doing a longer answer- but the answers are out there...

Questions like this one have lovely answers at the SexDictionary: http://www.sexdictionary.info/strap-ondildo_how%20to%20useit.html and by About http://lesbianlife.about.com/od/lesbiansex/a/HowToStrapOn.htm and then there is the Fairy Butch http://www.fairybutch.com who knows more about Strap Ons than any woman I know. Even E-how gets into the game... http://www.ehow.com/how_2027129_strap-on-dildo.html .

Alison

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 8/15/2007 5:40:14 PM

Drifa

Posts: 547
Joined: 7/27/2007
From: Rural Texas
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While almost any flared-vase dildo will work in a good harness, I actually prefer a double-ended model myself, one of the types that offer clitoral stimulation for the wearer. If you are using a harness, the double-ended Nexus is really nice. My favorite, however, is the Share: one end is molded to fit a woman's inner spaces, the other end is a phallus... and because of the interior fit you don't have to have the harness.

Like many women, I'm broad through the hips, so you need to take that into account in some positions (missionary, for example). Unlike with a narrower-hipped man, your partner is spread a bit wider to accomodate that. Usually with a strap on other positions seem to work better for me as a result. Classic doggy-style is probably the easiest to start with.

One nice alternative is a thigh harness (here, here, here, and here, for example). I wear it high on the thigh, and I find I have much better control with it. With this you're just putting the one leg between your partner's thighs. When on the receiving end of one of these, you can get very good clitoral stimulation also. And both partners can use one, and thus both of you may enjoy at the same time.

No matter what kind of harness, it needs to be stable. The dildo should not flop around. The firmer it's attached, the easier it is to use.

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 9/10/2007 12:32:31 PM

lesbman

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Joined: 9/10/2007
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view some lesbian domination experts like Chanta Rose or Julie Simone, they are doing incredible erotica, love these friends dearly!

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 9/10/2007 10:34:18 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
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Learn, one on one, in person, from someone who knows how to do it well. That's the best way to learn just about anything.

Master Fire

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 10/17/2007 6:36:19 PM

Sweet2377

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Joined: 10/8/2007
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Hey there... My advice... make sure that the harness fits the base of your dildo right against your clit almost... that way you can feel each movement that you make... if it fits just right against you, you can feel the movement in and out, and the natural hip movement kindof just happens... pretend like it is an extension of you within her.. the sexiness of it [if you find it sexy] does alot to help you get the 'groove' of it. You may feel silly for a second if you stand in front of a mirror and have never pictured yourself wearing one. It is fun though! Definately try it ;) I liked reading everyone's answers...

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 1/1/2009 3:23:21 PM

oraleuropean

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I have a MISTRESS with VIBE from Vixencreations - Not to big and not to small -

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 1/2/2009 2:09:15 AM

BondageBarbieX

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I have to agree with practice makes perfect

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 1/2/2009 7:23:58 PM

violentlilangel

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Joined: 10/14/2007
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I would think just try different positions and different styles see what suits you never used a strap on but i sure as hell want to!

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 1/5/2009 9:52:59 PM

DavanKael

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Joined: 10/6/2007
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Hi, domahpet----
Strap-ons are a wonderful thing when used well! :>
Understanding the anatomy of the participants well and working to make the experience erotic and non-detrimental is important. Investing in good toys here is preferrable; I favor a Feeldoe and a custom-designed harness. The rigidity of the silicone may not be comfortable for some. I believe that having the insertability has several benefits: 1)It feels good for the 'driver', 2)It can positively impact 'headspace' by making the appendage seem more real, 3)It can assist with being more careful of the 'reciever' as you can feel more, etc.
Have fun! Happy 2K9! :>
Davan

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 1/6/2009 8:47:31 AM

lusciouslips19

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Domah hasn't been around here for many months. Probably close to a year.

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 1/11/2009 5:52:58 PM

switch2please

Posts: 494
Joined: 12/5/2008
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Practice makes perfect.
Lube definitely helps, and it's easier if the fuck-ee is relaxed, especially for anal. Start slow, get comfy, and if they're into it you can go faster, harder, rougher, whatever.
If you do it right, a first-timer can take 7.5" ;) tried and true! It might be easier to start with something smaller though, you don't want to scare them off.....
BTW, mine is pretty pink!!

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 1/17/2009 3:27:17 PM

redwoodgirl

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OMG is this an old thread or what??!!!!

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 2/10/2009 3:20:45 PM

sensura

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practice practice practice lol just go slow and easy at first

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RE: looking for tips from women.... - 2/11/2009 8:23:06 AM

SmokingGoddess

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Joined: 12/16/2008
From: Cornfed Iowa
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Beyond the wonderful advice already offered, I would suggest allowing the bottom to do the maneuvering. Pay attention to both what you see and what you feel. I don't receive anal play often, so I am particularly careful with others. I do know that having their head in a good, receptive zone is important (and perhaps a popper doesn't hurt)!

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