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inyouagain -> RE: Should subs/slaves be allowed to post? (5/21/2004 8:52:40 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: iwillserveu
Should subs/slaves be allowed to post?
Post what?
As I've seen posted all over polls Dread recently started, you need to define your question.
Should subs/slaves be allowed to post... to post what? What are you referring to that they be allowed to post?
Something often seems to become lost somewhere in the shuffle of BDSM message boards. That being that many members from both sides of the dynamic tend to have BDSM relationships at home, or in their private lives, but get them on this and other BDSM message boards, and they tend to go crazy with vanilla personalities, and many of their posts are non lifestyle... merely recreational or some could say social.
What you post here and elsewhere you hang out to post, is a reflection of/on you. If you are sub/slave, and collared/owned, what you post here and elsewhere you hang out to post is also a reflection of/on your dominant. I see many times subs/slaves post here and other places they like to hang out to post, and really not have anything to say... just a fun pastime for them to sling around innuendo and peeve agenda's... typically being whiney ninny-nanny smartasses who seem to enjoy trying to stir up shit of one form or another... and insert agendas, often non-lifestyle in nature, or if so, just barely. Yes, I've seen this behavior also in dominants and I'm not singling out subs/slaves and forming a double-standard or stereotype.
If a dominant, your posts will reflect to your owned/collared subs/slaves, or to those of whom you have aspirations of such. Likewise, the reverse is true. Interesting, in that each side of the dynamic has potential gain from potential exposure. This is often the area of difficulty, as the "meat" of one's posts usually defines the one... what you say in your posts says a lot about you, or you and your dominant.
This brings up the "control" issue and aspects of the BDSM lifestyle. It is typically understood that unowned/uncollared subs/slaves are more or less "auditioning" in many cases with their posts... displaying all the fine qualities that suit them well for the BDSM lifestyle. While in the same token, owned/collared subs/slaves display all their fine qualities that make their owners/dominant's proud of their "property's behavior", or in some cases the owner/dominant screens their sub/slaves posts to ensure these qualities are well represented, and that they (owner/dominant) are also well represented. In the case of the dominant, they are often judged by their ability to maintain "control" of themselves and their subs/slaves. We all get judged by what we post.
It would be nice if nobody judged anybody, but let's face it folks... we don't all see eye-to-eye nor do we necessarily get along with one another.
If this and other BDSM message boards become simply social play and recreation for those on either side of the dynamic, then why is it being called a BDSM message board? Why not call it "free for all recreation area message board", and let the good times roll?
I am dominant and my BDSM lifestyle, my domain is defined on/by my terms and my subs/slaves are often allowed certain priviledges. I do not allow my subs/slaves to have a free rein... they are always under my control, and my control only. I go with them to vanilla functions in mind or body... they still belong to me in vanilla situations, but often under relaxed protocol, but my dominance goes with them. What my subs/slaves do or say in or out of my presence is a reflection on/of me... a responsibility of me to others in both the BDSM and vanilla circles, from either side of the dynamic. My subs/slaves have no priviledge of being smartasses, or shit stirrers, and I evaluate anything they would post before they would post it, and I assume responsibilty for the actions of my property. I won't allow my subs/slaves to administer, or attempt to administer protocol definitions or push any hidden agendas as my property, they do not define anything in our relationship, and could not hope to define anything in other's relationships.
Too often here and on other recreational hotspot BDSM message boards, you find a few people (dominant and sub) that simply try to be a spokesman on every single topic posted... get their words posted, regardless of value or content/context... just throw in two more cents worth of whatever... be involved, either in scope or in presence, and often merely the latter.
Message posters on BDSM message boards are a reflection of this lifestyle. What they post in the long runs tells who and what they are... troll, wannabe, player, lifestyler, dominant, submissive, etc. A dominant or submissive who insists on posting their say on any given topic, from either side of the power or gender dynamic is not what I would consider to be a serious lifestyler, more at someone with too much time on their hands.
Please define your poll question... post what?
Inyouagain
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