Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/26/2007 11:16:34 PM

wyldsubmissive

Posts: 157
Joined: 5/7/2005
Status: offline

Hello everyone. I tried to make the topic as clear as possible pertaining to this thread.

I personally, when my masochism or sadism goes unappeased for a while have very negative reactions. They involve but aren't limited to: seriously twisted masturbation fantasies, short fuse, depression and general shitty-ness.

There's a rumor about a fireman in some state who went on a spree of stalking and raping women because his sadism wasn't satisfied. The bad part is he never recognized the emotion for what it truly was.

Thankfully enough I got a brief but thorough (spelling?!) flogging that made my cravings a little less worse.

So, the question: have you had any experiences along the same lines as myself with this particular issue?

_____________________________

"A man's ability to have an erection has very little to do with my desire to submit to him.... If that were the case, I would have submitted to my vibrator years ago."

-credited to champangewishes

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/27/2007 2:49:02 AM

Lashra

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline

Yes, I get very edgy and depressed when I haven't released my sadism onto my sub. He in turn gets very depressed and suffers from bad subdrop if his masochistic needs aren't met. We don't live together yet so we have weeks in between seeing each other and it is tough. We haven't seen each other in a month and half due to illness on both sides and we both are climbing the walls needless to say.

~Lashra

_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”

(in reply to wyldsubmissive)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/27/2007 5:25:55 AM

petdave

Posts: 2479
Status: offline

Yes...
i've noticed that around the two-week point, i start getting very needy- the dangerous fantasies, obsesssing over ways to ask for a scene, elaborate scenarios for solo play...
Around three weeks, it starts to convert into resentfulness. Reduction in attentiveness- "If i can't get these needs met, then why should i work so hard at meeting hers?" Irritability. Spend a lot of time in garage.
Around four weeks, mostly guilt, focus on trying to "earn" a scene- "If i were a better sub, if i could somehow be desireable, maybe i would be worth scening with..." Depression. SI tendencies. Spend a lot of late nights in front of the computer drinking.
Around five weeks, despair, usually with a total loss of desire and a bit of mental disconnect- on occasion, i've ended up actually getting to scene during this phase, and it's always ended badly because i couldn't turn the pain-pleasure connection back on.
Around six weeks, the "random play" option takes over, and pretty much anything goes...

quote:

ORIGINAL: "Scrubs" TV show
Jordan: No.... I don't know! I'm just completely hormonal! I mean, you try going from out-of-control horny to clinically depressed six times a day.

Dr. Cox: Oh, gimme a break, I can knock that out on the way to work.

...dave

(in reply to Lashra)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/27/2007 5:48:24 AM

SirKinkster

Posts: 25
Joined: 3/8/2007
Status: offline

yes I have noticed that it affects me,sometimes i just really need to beat someone.and after I feel so much better....the release it gives me is good

(in reply to petdave)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/27/2007 7:57:13 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

Most people need their happy chemicals- cigarettes, caffeine, seratonins, endorphins, all of it. Your body becomes emotionally and physically used to these patterns and when you change it, your body and emotions don't like it.

You can either detox or find a way to get back on the drug. However, it's not a reasonable excuse for poor behavior, just like PMS.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to SirKinkster)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/27/2007 8:13:48 AM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

I have these cravings when it comes to SM, sex and blood. You're not alone.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to wyldsubmissive)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/27/2007 8:19:32 AM

slave4One

Posts: 53
Joined: 9/12/2004
From: Florida
Status: offline

Greetings A/all....
* laughing, searching madly for a lil emoticon of a pressure cooker about to blow*
Very interesting topic indeed.. this girl thought it was just her weirdness. After long "dry spells" (so to speak and no pun intended lol) she becomes quite tense, tending to simply go through the motions and doing what needs done on a daily basis.. almost like being on auto-pilot, turning off (if that's entirely possible) all thoughts, fantasies etc as that just seems to make it harder for her to deal with. Then the depression hits.. not a fun place to be to say the least. Once she has been allowed that release however... it is amazingly unbelieveable... the whole scene, before, during and after; the intensity is tremendous. Then she finds however that she is soooooo sore-in places untouched- *laughs* from the release of tension in her body ... mostly in her neck and upper shoulders where she tends to carry all her frustrations and tension.
Again, interesting post, thanks for starting it.
Best wishes,
~slave

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/27/2007 12:31:36 PM

sweetnurseBBW

Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

When everday life gets in the way and a short "dry spell' hits us I do tend to get uneasy. I get a little cranky . I just keep myself occupied and know that it won't last long.

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to wyldsubmissive)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/28/2007 10:41:06 AM

sunfleur

Posts: 75
Joined: 11/13/2005
Status: offline

i think we all need release no matter what your kink / need is.
when i dont get a good beating for a while, i can get very restless, anxious, even depressed.

(in reply to wyldsubmissive)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/28/2007 12:05:05 PM

PONYSEEKER

Posts: 364
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline

Oh yeah... after a couple of weeks I have to devote more and more energies into keeping myself in check.

(in reply to sunfleur)

Profile

Post #: 10

RE: Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/28/2007 3:48:39 PM

kyraofMists

Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

I sometimes have to go months without sex or SM. I used to struggle dealing with this because I have a very high sex drive (once a day will take the edge off) and SM is entwined with my sexuality. Since I have started intense workouts at least once a week I find I no longer struggle with the edginess from missing SM. The exercise is sufficient to give me just enough of an endorphine rush to balance me out. After exercising I will call him and share my pain so that I can connect with him and give him a little enjoyment over my pain.

Knight's kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to wyldsubmissive)

Profile

Post #: 11

RE: Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/28/2007 3:59:03 PM

earthycouple

Posts: 4462
Joined: 2/19/2006
Status: offline

What I find is my tension increases when I've not engaged with my submissive for any length of time. It is without a doubt my stress release and relaxation. That is not to say I take out my anger or other emotions on his ass...but I know when my lower back hurts it's time for a "Hada fix" *Hada is the name I gave my lovely submissive*

(in reply to wyldsubmissive)

Profile

Post #: 12

RE: Masochistic/sadistic dry spell & reactions - 3/28/2007 7:54:31 PM

raevnn

Posts: 152
Status: offline

I get very quiet and I can focus too hard on things as a way to distract myself from that 'need' to be hurt and used. I'll feel empty, tired, and lonely sometimes. Also, because it can cause insomnia, I'll work myself into the ground with cleaning and exercising in the hopes that I'll be too exhausted not to sleep. I also tend to cry more easily.

It doesn't happen very often, but it's painful when it does. I'm still not sure how to make it go away.

(in reply to wyldsubmissive)

Profile

Post #: 13