Another episode of drunken conundrum (Full Version)

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Rumtiger -> Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 4:43:09 AM)

So with the mix of 4 glasses of rum on the rocks, 4 shots of Jack and 5 pints of ale as well as a serving of french toast (dont ask) chased with a baileys and coffee I have a sudden thought in my mind.

I realize the only reason I submit, or can even be called a submissive, is more because I like it rather then it truley being in my nature, I think...it's not that I submit to someone, I simply allow them to dominate me...which means I'm really the one with the power isent it? I mean I choose who i'll allow, I choose by what that person will be offering me. And any other attempt to dominate me that I dont allow is typically met with very harsh reaction...sometimes even violence by me, case in point some male dom who decided he was top shit and got a fist in his throat for it, end of that party.

So...does this really make me a sub anymore? I'm asking mistress specifically because it would be a mistress whom I would have my interactions with.



onestandingstill -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 4:50:58 AM)

Hello Rumtiger,
Maybe you submit because you feel you're a little out of control and a Mistress may be able to help you find more balance and stability in your day to day life.
The anger and frustration I feel from your post leads me to wonder what scars in you are the source of such anguish.
It is indeed a good thing you seek to better understand yourself.
In understanding who you are and why you do what you do you will grow into a much more comfortable place as long as you continue your quest for knowledge.
The punch in the throat was a little extreme in my mind, but you say you seek females and don't specify what he did so who knows what to think about that except it showed you're pretty hostile sometimes.

Good luck to you as you find your way,
suzanne



SweetDommes -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 4:55:05 AM)

Yes, you choose who you submit to, but that person has the same right to reject your submission that you have to reject their dominance - so in the end, she has the exact same amount of power that you do.



Rumtiger -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 4:58:34 AM)

Well thats the whole thing, I dont think i'm choosing who i'll submit to..I dont even know if I've really ever submitted in my life now that I think on it, instead I'm choosing who i'm allowing to dominate over me.

I dunno, maybe theres a difference and maybe there isent.



SweetDommes -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 5:01:27 AM)

However you want to look at it, they have the same choice to ignore you that you have to ignore them.  Personally, someone who couldn't just say "hey, I'm not going to submit to you so stuff it" instead of hitting a dominant is going to get my 'ignore' vote every time.  Maybe there are some who get off on dominating someone who seems so volatile, but ... yeah, I think it's as much that you don't have control over yourself as anything else.



Rumtiger -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 5:06:36 AM)

Hey, the guy was being an dipshit who talked checks his ass couldent cash and using an excuse of a dominant talking to a sub to cover for it...he got what he deserved.

What was my question again?



SweetDommes -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 5:19:07 AM)

Him being a dipshit does not give you the right or reason to be one as well.  Again, it shows a lack of control over yourself.

However, I still stand by my original posting that the person who is dominating you has the same choice to not dominate you that you have to accept it or not - so no, you don't have all the power.  You may not be submissive - you may only be passive, or a bottom, or a lazy bum ... but regardless, you don't have all the power.



BeatMeDaily -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 5:29:53 AM)

wow Rumtiger, sounds like this is the perfect reason for not mixing alcohol with
bdsm scenes. i would strongely suggest talking with someone to get a handle on
your fetish expectations and role.  I'm sorry, but hitting someone like that is wrong,
no matter what, you are out of control.



Rumtiger -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 5:44:23 AM)

You see it as being another dipshit or wrong, I see it as just right, but this isent about my ethical code or whether you propably feel like your a better person than me because of it, its about my little revelation about my "submissiveness" and weather it could really be called as such (lazy bum? wtf?)

And BeatMe...what does this have to do with mixing booze and scenes?



SweetDommes -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 5:52:12 AM)

You said yourself that you don't submit, you just allow someone to dominate you - to me, that says that you make no effort either way which = lazy.  And I was using your lack of control of yourself (as someone else already has) to make a point about why you may be acting in the way that you have been.

If you wish to take offense, that is your decision, but perhaps posting while drunk is not the best option, as it muddies thought processes and tends to allow a person to become overly emotional in whatever direction they normally tend (in your case, apparently anger).



BeatMeDaily -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 6:00:04 AM)

Rumtiger, you talk much of drinking heavily, when you hit that male Dom, were
you drunk ?



Rumtiger -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 6:02:03 AM)

Well in your case isent it the same thing as allowing a sub to kneel to you? Or allowing anyone to submit to you? In a sense arent you calling yourself and all other doms lazy if it goes both ways like you say?

And your only point was to make it sound like you live in some Brady Bunch world where you live by old after school special programs about "oh just use your words" when deciding to make the little comment of "oh I would just ignore someone like you" it was an uneeded personel comment that you put up there to convince yourself of any self superiority you might think you have over me because I chose one course of action that you wouldent have even though we are widley different.

Just cause i'm hammered dosent mean i'm an idiot.

And ask my mistress if I'm lazy.



Rumtiger -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 6:03:39 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BeatMeDaily

Rumtiger, you talk much of drinking heavily, when you hit that male Dom, were
you drunk ?



Negative.



BeatMeDaily -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 6:04:51 AM)

i guess hitting someone like that strikes me as totally uncalled for, i hate fighting.
Don't get me wrong, i am a very cold-hearted person when it comes to war
and military actions, machine guns rule. (former Huey door-gunner here)
Personally i gave up drinking totally, because of hang-overs from 2 beers now a days ...
(light weight) but i used to drink much more and all my life most embarrassing moments were when drunk,
so i gave up excessive drinking long ago when i figured that out.



Rumtiger -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 6:08:33 AM)

Funny, I'm actually trying to take over your old job, granted theyre using Pavehawks now, though SERE has become my first choice now...another result of my little libatious assistance earliar tonight.

And with all due respect sir...wasent exactly a fight.




BeatMeDaily -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 6:11:18 AM)

cool, I'm glad to hear you were not drunk. good job
Maybe talking to the dungeon moderator would have been better.
Or if he assualted you, call the police.
I myself do not allow male Doms to touch or play with me.
i don't like how they treat male subs harsher than female subs.
if a male Dom hurts me while i'm tied up, when i got loose, he'd
better be long gone.  So i don't entirely disagree with you ...



SweetDommes -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 6:11:19 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rumtiger

Well in your case isent it the same thing as allowing a sub to kneel to you? Or allowing anyone to submit to you? In a sense arent you calling yourself and all other doms lazy if it goes both ways like you say?

And your only point was to make it sound like you live in some Brady Bunch world where you live by old after school special programs about "oh just use your words" when deciding to make the little comment of "oh I would just ignore someone like you" it was an uneeded personel comment that you put up there to convince yourself of any self superiority you might think you have over me because I chose one course of action that you wouldent have even though we are widley different.

Just cause i'm hammered dosent mean i'm an idiot.

And ask my mistress if I'm lazy.


I'm far from lazy - because I choose to do things other than laundry and dishes doesn't make me lazy ... however, we are specifically talking about the fact that you allow others to dominate you without you actively submitting to them.  I do NOT allow someone to submit to me just because they are there and I am there - which is what you have implied very strongly that you do.  I choose who I allow to submit to me, and let anyone else who tries know that their submission is not welcome to me.  This is an entirely different process than you have described regarding your behavior.

Also, I never said a WORD about you being an idiot.  I stated a commonly known fact that alcohol consumption muddies thought processes.  Again, if you wish to take offense, that's your damned problem, not mine.

And I don't give a shit if you really are lazy or not - I might if I were your mistress, but thankfully for both of us, I'm NOT.  I made a suggestion as to a possible answer to your question, it was there with other suggestions - you focused on that one.  That's not my fault or my problem.



Rumtiger -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 6:27:00 AM)

I know what you fucking said, me being an idiot is meaning that you think you can make certian personel comments and then deny them by using my alcaholic intake as your simple excuse for not taking responsibility, reading between the lines is such an uncanny ability isent it?

Look at the posts made by the other people on this thread, now look at yours, you really have any wonder why I just magically decided to focus on you?
 
Psst...and what exactly do you think "choose" means? Dunno where me and them just being there came from.



SweetDommes -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 6:37:26 AM)

You are still getting things from what I said that aren't really there.  I stated that alcohol consumption muddies thought processes - makes people jump to conclusions on a regular bases - it also makes them react emotionally (leading to the conclusion jumping more often than not).  I did accuse you of reacting in anger - I will not deny that at all.  I did not accuse you of being an idiot, so you can take that accusation and cram it into whatever hole you choose.

As for the rest of it - you are still not actively submitting, you are simply allowing whoever to dominate you.  To me, that isn't really a choice - you choose to not allow certain people dominate you (and apparently react with violence towards those people), but you don't seem to care one way or the other about the other people.  And you can take the rest of your drunken anger out on someone who gives a shit.  I made some suggestions (ones in line with others made) and you decided to get all pissed off about them.  Your problem, not mine.  Have a nice day and sober up before talking to me again.



BeatMeDaily -> RE: Another episode of drunken conundrum (3/31/2007 6:46:17 AM)

amen to that



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