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domtimothy46176 -> RE: Do you really care? (4/16/2005 11:14:50 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: MzBerlin
quote:
ORIGINAL: domtimothy46176
I ~am~ an elitist and I don't make any apology for it. My girl and I ~do~ look at folks and make a determination about whether or not they're real according to ~our~ standards. The way some folks do things is not compatable with our standards. I expect that a lot of folks feel that way about how ~we~ do things, too.
As a general rule, I don't pay too much attention to the profiles that talk about wanting a "real, true" whatever. The word simply has no meaning outside of personal or, at least, shared context. I figure some use it out of ignorance. Others may well feel theirs to be the only valid way of doing things. More power to them, if that's what works for them.
Is it silly? It is, especially in a profile. In a conversation with someone who knows, understands and agrees with your standards, not nearly so much. My real is my girl's real and it's also real as defined by a few others I know. In our conversations we may use the world freely without disagreement but I would not attempt to use it when conversing with others without knowing we shared definitions. IMO, that's simply pointless.
Timothy
Timothy-
I'm really confused by the first part of your post. You state that you're an "elitist" and that you don't make apologies for it. I'm not sure if I grasp that. Is your brand of BDSM somehow "realer" than someone else who doesn't live up to your "standard'? I don't really get that. It's like challenging someones' BDSM-ness (which was a wonderful thread a while back.) I'm just curious what your standards for "realness" is. Please elaborate.
Also, you state in your first paragraph that you DO make a judgement call about someones "realness" based on YOUR standards, then go on to say that it's "silly" for people to feel that there's one true way, THEN go on to state that real is defined by YOUR (and your friends who "knows, understand and agree with " your standards.) By that logic, if I do not understand, agree with or know your standard of BDSM, then I am not REAL.
I think THAT is silly.
As Always
B
I think perhaps I understand where you got lost. My opinion is that we ~each~ define "real" as it pertains to ourselves. My "real" reflects my minimum baseline level of behavior within the sphere of my personal interactions with others within the context of WIITWD. Likewise I expect most, if not all, also have certain criteria that must be met before they consider someone "real" as opposed to a player, a wannabe, a HNG, etc.
Perhaps that clears it up.
Timothy
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