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Tribute - 3/31/2007 7:17:23 PM

Posts: 6121
Joined: 3/18/2006
From: Tamaris
Status: offline

I identify as switch,purely because I have leanings in both directions.When in sub mode,as of now,I look towards the Dominant women who have profiles on this site,but have dismay at those that not ask,but demand tribute.I understand this as a monetary thing,furthermore the manner in which a profile is written.I understand there are Dominant women out there,who would like to meet a submissive counterpart,but why the pretence.Why write in such a way that it disuades people.I seek real people,and I seek real prospects,I look upon what I can give as a compliment to what is taken,I will submit as one dominates,a perfect union,we service each other in our needs,my belief.So why the question of tribute?I understand for some this is to pay for equiptment that might be used,but surely those that enjoy what they do have no problem in providing equiptment they enjoy using.I for one in my other mode provide equiptment,and I would never dream of charging for the use of,it is my interest,and my belief in enhancing anothers as well as my own need.I purchase or make what is required.If and when I am to be dominated,I seek a down to earth person such as myself,no pretence,I am male and want,I believe there are also females that want,why is it we cannot be real?

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 1:51:31 AM

Posts: 2
Joined: 8/17/2006
Status: offline

Hi
I couldn't agree with you more regarding the so called "Tribute",we all know that there are one hell of a lot of scams out there,so how do you determine who is genuine,and who is a thief?I also have a great deal of equipment,that I wouldn't dream of charging for the use of.Anyone who sends money to someone that they don't know,is a mug,desperate or terribly sad.
I have been in contact with several ladies on various sites,and they have become very abusive,when I have refused their request for a tribute.
They dangle a carrot,hoping that you will take the bait,and I would imagine that nine times out of ten,they are frauds.
Needless to say,that if I met someone genuine,I would treat her with the utmost respect,and I would get a great deal of enjoyment out of treating her well.
But until that day happens,the whole tribute thing,is a no go.
Kindest regards
Ads

< Message edited by ads2006 -- 4/1/2007 1:56:17 AM >

(in reply to Aneirin)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 6:15:06 AM

Posts: 1596
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline

Tribute or Gift?????

Look at the car in my profile, it was gift from a sub I trained weekly for over 2 years.

No, I did not ask for it.

(in reply to ads2006)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 6:21:09 AM

Posts: 1087
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Mid-Atlantic area
Status: offline

There are plenty of discussion about this. I don't think we need to contribute yet another long lenghty thread to it. Maybe do a search and find them. There are lots of them.

_____________________________

(in reply to DianeB269)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 8:39:21 AM

Posts: 283
Joined: 8/25/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DianeB269

Tribute or Gift?????

Look at the car in my profile, it was gift from a sub I trained weekly for over 2 years.

No, I did not ask for it.

That is the difference, we give gifts because we want to, not because we are asked. I immediately delete any message requesting tribute etc, its another word for exploitation of a submissive.

(in reply to DianeB269)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 8:42:33 AM

FelinePersuasion

Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline

A true gift is not demanded . you can not call demanding a tribute a gift.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DianeB269

Tribute or Gift?????

_____________________________

Most of the time if it looks like BS, smells like BS, you probably should not t taste it to see if, in fact, it is BS.

(in reply to DianeB269)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 8:42:55 AM

Posts: 1596
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Unrepentant1

quote:

ORIGINAL: DianeB269

Tribute or Gift?????

Look at the car in my profile, it was gift from a sub I trained weekly for over 2 years.

No, I did not ask for it.

That is the difference, we give gifts because we want to, not because we are asked. I immediately delete any message requesting tribute etc, its another word for exploitation of a submissive.

I never asked for tribute or gifts but, when I'm getting emails from a moron sub.
I always ask, how much money are you willing to spend on me.

<smiling>

Diane

PS; Anyone wanna give me $9000. so I can pay the IRS off?

< Message edited by DianeB269 -- 4/1/2007 8:46:04 AM >

(in reply to Unrepentant1)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 8:47:32 AM

Posts: 1087
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Mid-Atlantic area
Status: offline

I have no problem telling them right up front what my expectations are. Lets see...

Well trained slaves call me on the phone at 2.99 a min to speak to me and learn what I want?

or

Some wanna be guy that has no intention on doing a fucking thing for me other then wasting my time with email, chat and bullshit on what a good slave he's going to be?

Trust me its an easy choice. The best relationships I've had are men I've met over the phone, trained MY STYLE and then spent time with them.

lol- I guess that means I'm not real. Now that's really funny.

_____________________________

(in reply to DianeB269)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 8:49:06 AM

Posts: 1596
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DiannaVesta

lol- I guess that means I'm not real. Now that's really funny.

I think you're real.

Diane

(in reply to DiannaVesta)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 10:04:49 AM

Posts: 1087
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Mid-Atlantic area
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DianeB269

quote:

ORIGINAL: DiannaVesta

lol- I guess that means I'm not real. Now that's really funny.

I think you're real.

Diane

Thank you. I think a lot of people know this but I just get so damn sick of this whole tribute thing. Know what I mean? No matter how amny times you try and explain it (same with female supremacy) you've got at least a dozen idiots spitting out the same rightous crap.

So when you get set up are you going to have a party? If so, I really want to come. My father was Sicilian, my mother Native American. That makes me a whop-a-ho! lol

_____________________________

(in reply to DianeB269)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 10:38:09 AM

Posts: 82
Joined: 9/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DiannaVesta

Well trained slaves call me on the phone at 2.99 a min to speak to me and learn what I want

Some Dommes like to try and re-define submission as though a real submissive is someone who wants to pay them 2.99 a minute for the Domme to tell them what she wants or else they arent a real sub

but

all they are doing is linking paying for a service with submission. Its similar to if for example I was a male stripper and I said that all real women would pay me money to take my clothes off or else the women are fake. Thats just bullshit because.....

clients are clients

women are women

Then again perhaps Im not a real submissive because DianaVestas Dominance is so extreme its on an incomprehensible plain to the likes of myself and anyone who thinks Im making in interesting point.........*coughs*

< Message edited by MuscleyandCute -- 4/1/2007 10:42:19 AM >

(in reply to DiannaVesta)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 10:53:57 AM

Posts: 233
Joined: 12/10/2006
Status: offline

ya know its always the losers who fail to succeed with woman that do all the complaining. Say how come their are so many guys in happy relationships and your not? look in the mirror. what do u have to offer a woman? nothing. you aint cool, your tired and old and bitter and your gonna grow into a lonely old man. seriously, did your mom ignore you? did your mom neglect you? no woman with a brain will ever want you becuz you have a scar the size of europe covering your entire body mind soul & heart. your always gonna have hatred in your heart and you will always have to PAY to PLAY becuz no woman in their lovely right mind could stand to be in your acrid company.

< Message edited by GuidingLite -- 4/1/2007 10:54:53 AM >

(in reply to MuscleyandCute)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 11:00:54 AM

Posts: 233
Joined: 12/10/2006
Status: offline

if you have an attractive personality
or your just hot and sexy looking
you will find a female to play with you.

if you are not attractive in either way to a woman you just might havta pay to play. oh well.

some bitter guys cant accept they just dont have what ALL THE OTHER GUYS THAT ARE GETTING PLAY have.

I wonder: why do YOU think they are getting play and YOUR NOT? must be you.

(in reply to Aneirin)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 11:05:46 AM

Posts: 2619
Joined: 9/10/2006
Status: offline

A true true 'loser' is someone who has to resort to 'ordering' another person to pay them 'cos i am in charge and you are the slave' its pathetic and shows no class or cunning, just plain 'off the street' trash.... in my opinion. Those types are lifes garbage, they pretend to have a quality or service and if anything they discredit whatever skill was being crafted by experienced D's.

You pay for a service right? Fair enough, you PAY for the expertise, knowledge and time served skills that the person is offering, you dont just pay for a carftsperson to do something when they just picked it up in 5 minutes!!

The whole idea of tributing is showing your devotion and appreciation through gifts which are offered NOT demanded, those people may aswell be called prostitues although you get your monies worth from then!! (you realise i havent seen one right?....no really).

I've heard allsorts of bollox ' i deserve to be in luxury dont i?' , ' you are paying for a service!', ' but i get timewasters' listen to me for a change, the whole pro thing i can seriousely understand but the whole 'i'm going to call myself a Dom/Domme today so i can CHEAT men out of money' is morally wrong, hey if you have no problem being called cheap, tacky, garbage then good for you happy hunting but if you feel that you are angry at being called the names then pack it in, theres a saying here..... you made your bed.... now lie in it!

If you identify with being a nasty cancerous fucker who uses peoples feelings for finasncial gain and dont like it well.....get the fuck over it, you chose to be that way now accept it.

My opinion...thanks.

_____________________________

A hopeless dreamer she said, eyes of cloud and feet of lead.

(in reply to GuidingLite)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 11:29:34 AM

Posts: 78
Joined: 3/17/2007
Status: offline

A rich sub isn't necessarily a good sub. If I was trying to weed out those that don't intend on taking any action on their words I would require some long essay or something from a sub, not money. Something explaining perhaps how she/he thought she/he would serve me. Besides, I agree, a tribute should be a gift.

I would question my own ability to dominate another if I could not even support myself.

-Dawn

(in reply to bludemonn)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 1:05:23 PM

Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline

I do want "tribute" but not in cash or expensive gifts. I would much prefer a thoughtful gift to an expensive one. An hour of massage and pampering would cost nothing but the submissive's time and energy, and it would be a thoughtful gift. I do want and expect "tributes" like that in a D/s relationship.

It's possible to take shortcuts by pulling out your wallet. The point of a gift is for the recipient to enjoy it, and to make an offering of your service to the dominant you wish to please. There are things you can simply buy with money to accomplish that aim. But I think that if you do that too often, you are shortchanging both people in the relationship. It is much more fun to have you get naked in chains and cook something pleasing for me in the kitchen than just whip out the credit card and buy me dinner. Of course if you can't cook, then dinner out may be the only option for that particular type of service. And dinner out can be a lot of fun too. Hmmm, you're wearing what under those clothes? *wink*

The dynamic of the tribute is a powerful one. The male shows that he is willing to expend energy and resources to serve and to please the female, and the dominant accepts his offering and enjoys it for herself. In fact this form of courtship exchange is used in many species other than ours, and may well be hardwired into our biology.

Money is a condensed form of time and energy. It is not as intimate or direct an exchange as simply offering the time and energy, but it is essentially the same courtship behavior as can be seen in many species besides our own. Males display and offer, expending massive energetic and biological resources in the process. Females choose based on the male's fitness as displayed by the abundance of his resources and his willingness to invest them in the courtship process. We may transcend biology as a matter of choice, but we cannot edit the basic paradigm in our species.

(in reply to Aneirin)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 1:15:06 PM

Posts: 491
Joined: 10/10/2005
From: Upstate, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DawnFire

A rich sub isn't necessarily a good sub. If I was trying to weed out those that don't intend on taking any action on their words I would require some long essay or something from a sub, not money. Something explaining perhaps how she/he thought she/he would serve me. Besides, I agree, a tribute should be a gift.

I would question my own ability to dominate another if I could not even support myself.

-Dawn

Agreed.

I guess it all depends on what you are looking for. I'm looking for a serious relationship and potential partner. To me, the whole tribute thing doesn't really fall in line with what I'm looking for.

When responding to someone's profile, I write a long, original note addressing what they are looking for based on what's in their profile and what I'm looking for and able to offer as a man and a submissive. If a woman can't tell that I am at least serious and am looking for something real based on my correspondence, I don't know what giving them 100 bucks or whatever will display. It takes a lot longer to write something heartfelt and real than it does to paypal or whatever.

If I was looking for something casual and basically putting someone to put on retainer to take my call and meet my immediate type needs, than I guess I could see tribute as something that would be acceptable.

In the end, I don't begrudge FemDoms for requiring tribute or whatever. Everyone is looking for something very specific in this lifestyle and each person has their on way or idea on how they should go about getting what they want. Hopefully those requiring tribute find what they want and desire. Hopefully those looking down upon it find what they're looking for as well.

< Message edited by SlaveBlutarsky -- 4/1/2007 1:17:43 PM >

(in reply to DawnFire)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 4:27:25 PM

Posts: 428
Joined: 3/12/2005
Status: offline

I have met many men on this, and other sites, who waste my time and my patience. I get very tired of the 'do-me' submissive or the man who claims to be submissive when in reality is quite misogynistic. I can understand why some women would resort to 'tribute' (ie: pay for play).

Mass media has bastardized the whole essence of submission and the Dominant woman. No longer is a Dominant woman a woman who is powerful in her sexuality as well as in her very self but rather a vehicle for a man to explore his desires. I rarely meet a man on these sites who speaks first of wanting to know me and my wants rather than going on about his expectations of my role in his sexual fantasy.

I do not delve into the whole realm of 'tribute' but I can understand why many women would. Perhaps it is time many of the men on these sites started policing their fellow submissive men in an attempt to educate the new or ignorant of the real value of a Dominant woman - one that is not monetary.

Wickad

(in reply to SlaveBlutarsky)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 4:44:23 PM

Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wickad

I have met many men on this, and other sites, who waste my time and my patience. I get very tired of the 'do-me' submissive or the man who claims to be submissive when in reality is quite misogynistic. I can understand why some women would resort to 'tribute' (ie: pay for play).

Mass media has bastardized the whole essence of submission and the Dominant woman. No longer is a Dominant woman a woman who is powerful in her sexuality as well as in her very self but rather a vehicle for a man to explore his desires. I rarely meet a man on these sites who speaks first of wanting to know me and my wants rather than going on about his expectations of my role in his sexual fantasy.

I do not delve into the whole realm of 'tribute' but I can understand why many women would. Perhaps it is time many of the men on these sites started policing their fellow submissive men in an attempt to educate the new or ignorant of the real value of a Dominant woman - one that is not monetary.

Wickad

I wonder if it is almost impossible for a submissive man to properly court a dominant woman because he can't even control himself. Seriously -- if he's approaching her first and foremost because deep down he feels/hopes she may be the answer to his sexual fantasies, how can that NOT be at the forefront of his courting process?

In my 10+ years online and having a lot of subs contact me because of a fairly high profile site, I would say a handful (less than 10) out of literally thousands every approached me with questions or interests in me outside of my kinky side. No one asked about my love of animals, my traditional upbringing, none of the little "tidbits" that were on my site for all to see. When my blatant, passionate, even erotic interest in hockey (of all things) was made clear, still few felt compelled enough to ask about it unless it was a sexual question.

It's nearly impossible to feel like you are being approached as a woman first and foremost when you know you are not, and the guys make no effort to even try to be polite about it. When they do ask the questions about your personal interests, they are often insincere and flat. That's why the idea of a tribute - in the form of a personalized token that shows some character, thought and that the guy is paying attention - sets a guy apart (this is different from the "send me $20 and I will talk to you" tribute).

I still can't believe that in all the hockey talk I did and how much it clearly rocked my world only 1 sub out of about 3 thousand had the clever idea of doing something like -- gee, cutting out a news clipping from their local foreign newspaper about a team brawl - and dropping it in the mail for me with a note that said "Thought you'd enjoy." Total cost? Maybe $2.00. But I still remember it and remember him!

Akasha

_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to Wickad)

RE: Tribute - 4/1/2007 4:56:36 PM

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

I know you may get off typing insulting little words - but that is all they are - .littlewords. that come from someone who doesn't even have a photograph or profile, unlike the OP (oh please ask how I know that the avatar he uses is 'real'... oh go on - you know you want to....)

sorry mods - back to the usual programming...

I do not see 'complaining'. I see a simple question. Why do people request a tribute.

Seems like an honest question to me.

I can understanding it... I do see it as a mostly female situation - although I have met the rare male dominant who has made tribute demands, I believe that males make more 'sexual' ones where as females tend to make more commercial requests.

Not sure if that is an indication on sexual stereotyping - who knows? That is something I have often pondered.

It could be something to do with ritual and courtship. In the past, and in dating outside wiitwd, men often bring gifts for their date. Be they flowers, or chocolates or even paying for the meal. Maybe the 'tribute' is just an extension of that in wiitwd?

Love ya A!

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to GuidingLite)

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