Ok I have not read all the post but I will share this experence. I use to belong to a vol. resuce squad in a rual community." yes I have all kinds of story's." One morning we were called out and low and behold this guy around 50. was playing around with some friends and he used a cucumber on his ass and it went up and got stuck. cucumbers are often smooth and round easy things to lose and not be able to get ahold of and once it starts up it keeps going up. Trying to keep our proffessional faces he was taken to the hospital and had to endue surgery and humiliation. Therefore I would recommend not to use a cucumber and get items that have been designed for such fun.