40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work

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40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/21/2005 11:19:44 AM

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Some are also good for home or leisure time use...

1. "I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit."

2. "I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce."

3. "How about never? Is never good for you?"

4. "I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public"

5. "I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way"

6. "I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter."

7. "I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message."

8. "I don't work here. I'm a consultant."

9. "It sounds like English, but I can't understand a damn word you're saying"

10. "Ahhh... I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again."

11. "I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid."

12. "You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers."

13. "I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn."

14. "I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth."

15. "I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you."

16. "Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view."

17. "The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist."

18. "Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental."

19. "What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?"

20. "I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant."

21. "It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off."

22. "Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial."

23. "And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?"

24. "Do I look like a people person?"

25. "This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting."

26. "I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left."

27. "Sarcasm is just one more service we offer."

28. "If I throw a stick, will you leave?"

29. "Errors have been made. Others will be blamed."

30. "Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed."

31. "I'm trying to imagine you with a personality."

32. "A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door."

33. "Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?"

34. "Too many freaks, not enough circuses."

35. "Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?"

36. "Chaos, panic, and disorder - my work here is done."

37. "How do I set a laser printer to stun?"

38. "I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted a salary."

39. "Who lit the fuse on your tampon?"

40. "Oh I get it... like humour... but different!"

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/21/2005 11:31:24 AM

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Harsh, and Very funny, M

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a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/21/2005 11:59:38 AM

Posts: 2021
Joined: 8/11/2004
From: SoCal aka Hell
Status: offline

If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.
Thank you for not being perky.
If I gave a shit, you'd be the first person I'd give it to.
Don't question authority. They don't know either.
I didn't say it was your fault. I SAID I was going to blame YOU.
Never put off till tomorrow what you can ignore entirely.
I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
No problem is so large or so difficult that it can't be blamed on someone else.
Try a little kindness. As little as possible.
I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert!
It's only unethical if you get caught.
If at first you don't succeed try management.
Not a morning person doesn't even begin to describe it.
I got out of bed for this?
80% of success is just showing up.
When I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you.
It IS as bad as you think it is and they ARE out to get you.
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
The buck doesn't even slow down here.
Department of Redundancy Department.
Another deadline, another miracle.
Does your train of thought have a caboose?

_____________________________

Insanity -- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
--R. D. Laing

"Oh, but if I went 'round sayin' I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away."

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/21/2005 12:31:13 PM

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Nice addendum MadameDahlia, M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to MadameDahlia)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/21/2005 1:20:32 PM

ruffnecksbabygir

Posts: 412
Joined: 1/4/2005
Status: offline

"I'm on the rag and bloated so BACK OFF BITCH!"

"I'm still recovering from last night's S&M scene with my Master so don't bother me, i'm NOT in the MOOD!"

_____________________________

~hugs~
Babygirl

:Disclaimer: The above is only this slave's opinion:

"And Those Who Danced Were Thought To Be Quite Insane By Those Who Could Not Hear The Music" -- Angela Monet

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/21/2005 2:17:50 PM

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From: SoCal aka Hell
Status: offline

Many thanks TallBlkFullfig!

Would this happen to be your favorite?

"When I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you."

-impish grin-

_____________________________

Insanity -- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
--R. D. Laing

"Oh, but if I went 'round sayin' I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away."

(in reply to ruffnecksbabygir)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/21/2005 9:35:57 PM

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Joined: 6/25/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MadameDahlia
If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.
Thank you for not being perky.
I didn't say it was your fault. I SAID I was going to blame YOU.
Never put off till tomorrow what you can ignore entirely.
I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert!
If at first you don't succeed try management.

I liked all of these...

quote:

Not a morning person doesn't even begin to describe it.
I got out of bed for this?

I loooooved these, lol...
I think a boyfriend actually broke up with me once because he felt I was too grumpy and insensitive in the morning...
We chat a year later (after my stepping into Fem Dom world), I told him he should have awakened me with coffee/breakfast in bed and other personal services that don't require I speak at all, and he laughed, and said he wishes he knew... Oh well,

M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to MadameDahlia)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/21/2005 10:50:34 PM

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Joined: 8/11/2004
From: SoCal aka Hell
Status: offline

-laughs- Glad you were entertained. Everyone should laugh at least once a day. Keeps us all young... or so I've heard.

-small grin- If only he had known then what he knows now... -perks a brow- Him saying that he wishes he had known makes me wonder if he isn't just the tiniest bit curious about the life.

_____________________________

Insanity -- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
--R. D. Laing

"Oh, but if I went 'round sayin' I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away."

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/22/2005 11:27:56 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MadameDahlia
-small grin- If only he had known then what he knows now... -perks a brow- Him saying that he wishes he had known makes me wonder if he isn't just the tiniest bit curious about the life.

Oh he's very curious about the lifestyle, and has already bent on several things I'd like to experiment with...
Our impasse is that he is living with a girlfriend and would only be cheating on her... This lady doesn't knowinly do that to other women. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to MadameDahlia)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/22/2005 11:44:52 AM

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quote:

This lady doesn't knowinly do that to other women.

I knew there was something about you that I liked!

I'll add one more one liner...

Before marriage a man yearns for a woman. Afterward the ''y'' is silent.

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/22/2005 1:46:52 PM

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Joined: 6/25/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth
Before marriage a man yearns for a woman. Afterward the ''y'' is silent.

Thant's my favorite one of all Merc....

M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/22/2005 4:37:38 PM

Posts: 2021
Joined: 8/11/2004
From: SoCal aka Hell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig
Oh he's very curious about the lifestyle, and has already bent on several things I'd like to experiment with...
Our impasse is that he is living with a girlfriend and would only be cheating on her... This lady doesn't knowinly do that to other women. M

Ah... I see the sticky situation now. Perhaps if he and she do not work out and you haven't moved on to someone absolutely fabulous you might try then.

_____________________________

Insanity -- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
--R. D. Laing

"Oh, but if I went 'round sayin' I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away."

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/22/2005 5:13:30 PM

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Joined: 3/20/2005
Status: offline

Those are great and i would like to say some of them. I have a shirt i wear to work once a week that says: I can only please one person a day, today ISN'T your day, tomorrow doesn't look good either! :)

(in reply to MadameDahlia)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/22/2005 5:55:38 PM

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Joined: 1/1/2004
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I like "I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person", "Not amused doesn't even begin to cover it", "I'm 51% sweethaert & 49% bitch, don't push it" & "Take time to eat the flowers". Plus my signature,which tends to mirror my life lately.

_____________________________

Take time to eat the flowers!

(in reply to hazeydaisy)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/22/2005 6:06:57 PM

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*smirk* i used to have a t-shirt that said "I don't have an attitude. You have a perception problem."

(in reply to sweetnygirl)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/22/2005 7:14:15 PM

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Joined: 2/2/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: michellewarner

*smirk* i used to have a t-shirt that said "I don't have an attitude. You have a perception problem."

Oh I love this one, where can I get one?

(in reply to michellewarner)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/23/2005 6:40:03 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MadameDahlia
Perhaps if he and she do not work out and you haven't moved on to someone absolutely fabulous you might try then.

I'm not hoping they don't work out, though it's obvious on some level, it isn't my problem to worry about...
However, if he was "single" again, and I wasn't otherwise occupied, I would probably play with him... We had sparks and than some... M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to MadameDahlia)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/24/2005 3:11:29 AM

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Joined: 3/7/2005
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*smiling at siamsa* i wish i knew. i haven't seen one in a long time, 'n i wore mine until it wasn't even fit to be made into cleaning rags.

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/24/2005 7:31:12 AM

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michellewarner / siamsa

Try these sites:
http://tshirtsthatbite.home.comcast.net
/http://www.tshirthell.com/

I didn't look through every shirt they offer, but I'd bet if anyone would have it they would.

If not, next time we head to Venice Beach they have about 25 stores to look though with some great tee-shirts. Last Auguest when NJ Governor, Jim McGreevey, came out of the closet I sent a case of "My Governor can beat up your governor" with Arnold's picture on them, tee-shirts back to my friends in NJ.

(in reply to michellewarner)

RE: 40 Things You'd Like to Say Out Loud at Work - 4/24/2005 11:15:52 PM

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Joined: 3/7/2005
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*sigh* i looked in both places, and they didn't have them. *smile* thanks for trying though. they have a lot of other cool stuff that i'm probably going to have to have...

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

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