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Outcasts? - 5/26/2004 8:59:34 AM   
indigo302


Posts: 127
Joined: 4/28/2004
From: Delaware
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quote:

here as a outcast of society as well. (edited for proper spelling)


It is my opinion that those who feel or label themselves as "outcasts of society", are so because they themselves make it so.

I think the BDSM comminuty is a subsection of society, just as many other subsections. I am able to interact in both the BDSM subsection, as well as society as a whole, without problem. I don't feel I need to shut myself off from the rest of society, simply because I don't agree with the majority 100% of the time.

I have friends and interact with people from all walks of life, poor, rich, middle class, white, black, hispanic, asian, gay, bisexual, heterosexual, dominant, submissive, top, bottom, master, slave, young, old, middle aged, and on and on. My life is richer for having them. Why on earth would I want to cut myself off from ANY of them?

I am a part of an alternative lifestyle. That doesn't make me an outcast from other communities. It means I have more communities from which to draw, and for this I am thankful.

Thoughts?

indigo
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RE: Outcasts? - 5/26/2004 10:04:12 AM   
Moleculor


Posts: 189
Joined: 5/23/2004
Status: offline 		*cheer*

I'm so tired of hearing from BDSM-types live in abject terror of the world because they somehow equate being kinky with being 'outside of the norm'. Maybe it's just the generation I'm in, but there aren't -that- many people who think badly of me for being kinky.

People being afraid of who they are just makes the rest of the world that way too. Thankfully people's own fear of how the world will react isn't completely stopping the world (or rather, America) from becoming a bit more open minded, as seen in shows like CSI 'n such.

< Message edited by Moleculor -- 5/26/2004 12:07:41 PM >

(in reply to indigo302)
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RE: Outcasts? - 5/26/2004 2:07:49 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I'm so tired of hearing from BDSM-types live in abject terror of the world because they somehow equate being kinky with being 'outside of the norm'


It does exist outside the norm.

Where the problem lies is how exactly do you define normal? To many of the mindless mouth-breathers who infest this place what Lifestylers do is outside of the norm. On the other hand, to us, what they do is outside of the norm.

Sinergy

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RE: Outcasts? - 5/26/2004 3:00:57 PM   
Estring


Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
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quote:


I'm so tired of hearing from BDSM-types live in abject terror of the world because they somehow equate being kinky with being 'outside of the norm'



We ARE outside of the norm. That's why it's called kinky. I am under no illusions that this lifestyle will ever be mainstream, but so what? That isn't a concern of mine. But on the other hand, it is only a part of who I am. There are many things that I do that are the norm. I don't consider myself an outcast at all.

(in reply to Sinergy)
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RE: Outcasts? - 5/26/2004 4:26:34 PM   
ShadeDiva


Posts: 1005
Joined: 3/31/2004
From: Sacramento, California
Status: offline 		I am an odd duck no matter where I go - I just don't view that as a negative, hehe!

I don't think of terms of normal either - it's really relative anyway.

As for outside of society - hell, everyone KNOWS who and what I am, so yanno, I don't know how much more you can merge those socities together really. I'm pretty much open about everything to do with me, so really don't have much to fear from any segment of anything, I'm pretty much as open of a book as one can get I think.

Anyone that would judge me isn't someone I'd care to have in my surroundings, nor would I expend a fraction of energy giving a single turd as to what they thought of me - they can do whatever the hell they like, I simply can't be bothered to care. Works as a wonderful filter I think for the kinds of people that you deem "good people".

~ShadeDiva

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(in reply to Estring)
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RE: Outcasts? - 5/26/2004 8:51:39 PM   
MizSuz


Posts: 1881
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: indigo302

I am a part of an alternative lifestyle. That doesn't make me an outcast from other communities. It means I have more communities from which to draw, and for this I am thankful.



Beautifully put.

More often than not I've found that I prefer to fill my life with people who are tolerant and diverse for the very reason you state - it enriches my life and that is a blessing (albeit self created).

_____________________________

“The more you love, the more you can love—and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
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(in reply to indigo302)
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RE: Outcasts? - 5/26/2004 9:05:56 PM   
Moleculor


Posts: 189
Joined: 5/23/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I am under no illusions that this lifestyle will ever be mainstream


Hell, it already is mainstream. Sure, the hyper-vocal crotchety old right-wing extremists may make it seem like it's not, but considering a large majority of people within five years of my age are at least openminded enough to accept it as part of normal society, I don't think you can get any more 'mainstream' than that.

EDIT: Hell, I'm even in the Belt Buckle of the Bible Belt. Prolly the most religion-focused town in Texas. And it's mainstream here.

< Message edited by Moleculor -- 5/26/2004 11:11:50 PM >

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RE: Outcasts? - 5/26/2004 11:37:08 PM   
Estring


Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I don't know what you consider mainstream, but I live in Los Angeles, and I can guarantee that the D/s lifestyle is not considered mainstream. And not just from old right wingers.
American Idol is mainstream. D/s isn't.

(in reply to Moleculor)
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RE: Outcasts? - 5/26/2004 11:47:06 PM   
EStrict


Posts: 729
Joined: 1/11/2004
Status: offline
quote:

American Idol is mainstream. D/s isn't.


:: Laughing:: Did you watch the season final tonight Sir? Master and I did and loved that Latoya wore a chocker that had a lock and key hanging from it....

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RE: Outcasts? - 5/26/2004 11:53:41 PM   
Estring


Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Lol. Really? That's cool. I would imagine she has no idea what that really is though. But you never know..... Did she sing "Prisoner Of Love"?

(in reply to EStrict)
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RE: Outcasts? - 5/27/2004 12:02:20 AM   
EStrict


Posts: 729
Joined: 1/11/2004
Status: offline 		No Sir, but it would have been a good choice :) Actually I already deleted it off Tivo so I don't remember it, and Master isn't at home (he had to go down to the Shoe). Latoya wasn't one of the finalists, but she was a hell of a singer.

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Sandy

Don't take life too seriously, no one gets out alive anyway...

(in reply to Estring)
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RE: Outcasts? - 5/27/2004 2:16:16 AM   
rain


Posts: 319
Joined: 4/13/2004
Status: offline 		indigo,

i agree that bdsm is another subsection of society and while i don't consider myself to be an "outcast" per say, i am part of a culture which is not (often) understood by mainstream society.

i prefer to think of myself as a creative, open-minded, non-conformist who enjoys exploring things/places/ideas that are of interest to me...or a part of me.

Moleculor, i wouldn't say that bdsm is mainstream; however, if all or most of your friends are into bdsm, if just about everything you do outside of work, (or at work) is all intertwined, then it may appear as though bdsm is mainstream....however, i don't believe it is.

i've lived in Washington DC, NYC, and Chicago, and i can tell you, from my personal experience; while there may be certain neighborhoods within each of these cities that are "kink" friendly, bdsm is generally misunderstood.

Again, this is my personal experience. BTW- i happen to work in a very "kink" friendly neighborhood in Chicago, and for those of us in the know- we see, hear, and find kinky people, places, and things just about everywhere...doesn't mean other folks have a clue as to what the hell is going on! <g>

~rain~ (edited to add the PS)

PS. Some "old right wingers" are very kinky!

< Message edited by rain -- 5/27/2004 4:17:32 AM >

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RE: Outcasts? - 5/27/2004 12:02:14 PM   
Thanatosian


Posts: 765
Joined: 5/10/2004
From: New Castle, PA
Status: offline
quote:

PS. Some "old right wingers" are very kinky!



I consider myself to be one of them - and make no bones about it in my everyday life - and while I dont exactly advertise my lifestyle choices ( ok i do to an extent - I have a bdsm symbol ring that I wear on my left hand, and sometimes I'll wear a leather bracer on my left arm ), nor do I try and hide them either - as I have stated in another thread, most of my friends and co workers know I am in the lifestyle - and have no problem with it, or if they do, they hide it well.

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RE: Outcasts? - 5/27/2004 5:36:02 PM   
MistressDREAD


Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
actually I concider vanilla living
the outside outcaste way LOL
Moleculor
Your thought process and belief
is nice to think about if it could
be a reality in these days and
times but for sumone whom has
seen the inside of a jailhouse on
more then one occation for practicing
My kink I can tell you that in more
places in the good ol US of A it is still
looked down on and against the law.
Thisis the main reason that since the
inseption of online that has made this
lifestyle more readily available to the
public at large to use in thier fantsies
many whom desire it to be a part of
their lifes but desire to hide it in real life
tempt to bend its ways into their vanilla
living not understanding that this does
not make the alternate living anymore
acceptable in the societytoday or the
publics eye and if found out can lose
their work, lose custody of children,
lose thier very way of living and being.
There are more laws
on the books in every state that forbid
certain items that We all practice then a
dog has fleas and all it takes is for one person
to complain for any number of given reasons
for a play party, munchie, Public Dungeon,
private home, adult store, BDSM club to be
busted for such and its occupants taken away
and their lifes to be turned upside down. Just
attend any PUBLIC protest at the Goverments
front doors and you will not find many willing
to go totally public for Our Lifestyles causes.
In fact there are many new laws being added
to the books that will set back Our way of life
by years if people do not wake up and smell
the coffee and make their opinions known to
thier state representitives on the lifestyle
issues being addressed to remove rights.

(in reply to Thanatosian)
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RE: Outcasts? - 5/27/2004 6:31:18 PM   
January


Posts: 891
Joined: 4/17/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EStrict
Latoya wore a chocker that had a lock and key hanging from it....


Sandy,

Didn't Nikki McKibben from the first American Idol always wear a collar?

January

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[link: http://www.bookstrand.com/miss-you-sir] Miss You, Sir by January Rowe is available from Siren now! It's my latest smokin' hot bdsm romance.[/link]




(in reply to EStrict)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Outcasts? - 5/27/2004 9:15:36 PM   
EStrict


Posts: 729
Joined: 1/11/2004
Status: offline 		It's possible January, but I have only seen clips from the first season. I only have watched the 2nd two seasons.....

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Sandy

Don't take life too seriously, no one gets out alive anyway...

(in reply to January)
Profile   Post #: 16
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