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Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/22/2007 9:05:29 PM   
zindyslave


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I was wondering how you handle working 8 to 9 hours a day and can still do things for your Master at home. I just got a job in retail so I am standing 8 hours a day and I am gone for 9 I literally don't have the energy to do anything for him, I really want to but can't find it in me to do it. He is at home all day and he has been doing the things I used to do before I started working. It just feels wrong to me that he is doing all of that stuff. Anyone have any suggestions on what I could do to make things feel right for me again?

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Only when you see the invisible can you do the impossible.
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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/22/2007 9:10:57 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


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quote:

ORIGINAL: zindyslave

I was wondering how you handle working 8 to 9 hours a day and can still do things for your Master at home. I just got a job in retail so I am standing 8 hours a day and I am gone for 9 I literally don't have the energy to do anything for him, I really want to but can't find it in me to do it. He is at home all day and he has been doing the things I used to do before I started working. It just feels wrong to me that he is doing all of that stuff. Anyone have any suggestions on what I could do to make things feel right for me again?

Laugh at yourself and realize that being a slave is about who you are, not what you do.  You're holding your life up to stereotypes, not reality.

You're doing what he wants you to do, you are serving by providing income and working in the way he has chosen you to work.

You want to serve the way your stereotypical views tell you that you should serve, or the way your actual master wants you to serve?

Relax, it's ok.  Most slaves have trouble breaking out of their own ideas of what slavery should be.  Take it as a great sign that he cares more about the RELATIONSHIP working and having a good healthy house, rather than living up to and being prisoners of stereotypes.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to zindyslave)
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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/22/2007 9:11:14 PM   
Suleiman


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Honey, you ARE doing things for him. You're WORKING. LONG SHIFTS. And yet, you still want to take care of him when you get home. If an animal, say a horse, were put to work for so long, it would be given a cool-down period and proper after-care, including grooming and possibly even a massage. I bet, if you get an hour or so of after-care when you get home, you'll find the energy you need to take care of his needs for the rest of the night.

A good slave is an investment, and should be cared for in an appropriate fashion.

_____________________________

Think of my verbosity as a sort of litmus test for our relationship. I write in a manner identical to how I speak and how I think. If you can not cope with what I have written here, it is probably for the best if we go our separate ways.

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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/22/2007 9:14:03 PM   
zindyslave


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Well, he would like for me to get up and take care of things at home but while I am working my feet end up hurting so bad that I can barely walk after I sit down after coming home, I feel like since what I was doing before going to work is being took care of by him that I am somehow not fulfilling my duties. 

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Only when you see the invisible can you do the impossible.

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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/22/2007 9:48:36 PM   
leili


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Joined: 3/18/2007
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eghth, all i have to say in this regard is that you work on your feet all day so take some time to take a bath when you get home and relax let your feet heal before you start doing chores.  and in my opinion since you are working you should be the one doing the easy chores, if any at all

_____________________________

Serving another is simple for a slave for it is a desire in the core of their soul. To be a true Hanian slave is hard because the ultimate goal is to become the extension of his or her Owner's will, a road only very few are daring enough to walk.


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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/22/2007 9:53:31 PM   
zindyslave


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Well, I understand that but how do I make it seem right to myself that it is okay to let things slide when I want to do everything I can for him? It just seems unnatural to me, that he is doing house work instead of me. I guess I feel this way because of some of my friends that are in the lifestyle would tell me to suck it up and just do what I am supposed to do. I am just trying to think of ways that would justify me not doing what I am used to doing for him.

_____________________________

http://www.myspace.com/zindygirl

Only when you see the invisible can you do the impossible.

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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/22/2007 10:01:56 PM   
leili


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Joined: 3/18/2007
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then you should talk to him to have him reassure you that everything is fine the way it is.  i mean the only way you are going to feel better about it is if you ask him if you are pleasing him and if there is any way that you could please him further or if there is anything else that he wants you to do.  so pretty much it's going to have to be the communication thing. 

_____________________________

Serving another is simple for a slave for it is a desire in the core of their soul. To be a true Hanian slave is hard because the ultimate goal is to become the extension of his or her Owner's will, a road only very few are daring enough to walk.


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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/22/2007 10:07:01 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


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quote:

ORIGINAL: zindyslave
I am just trying to think of ways that would justify me not doing what I am used to doing for him.

He has told you this is how it is to be. 

What other justification do you need?

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/23/2007 1:56:33 AM   
AquaticSub


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Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: zindyslave

Well, I understand that but how do I make it seem right to myself that it is okay to let things slide when I want to do everything I can for him? It just seems unnatural to me, that he is doing house work instead of me. I guess I feel this way because of some of my friends that are in the lifestyle would tell me to suck it up and just do what I am supposed to do. I am just trying to think of ways that would justify me not doing what I am used to doing for him.


Is he working? Does he enjoy the housework? Is that how he says it's going to be?

Why second guess what pleases him? If you are working nine hours because he wants you to work, then you are serving him every second you are at that job. When you come home and take care of your feet you are serving him by taking care of his property. Serve him as he wants to be served, not how your friends want you to serve him. Trust me, he probably won't like all the things they like.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to zindyslave)
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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/23/2007 5:28:42 AM   
slaveish


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quote:

ORIGINAL: zindyslave

Well, I understand that but how do I make it seem right to myself that it is okay to let things slide when I want to do everything I can for him?


Rituals work well for me. It keeps me in the proper frame of mind, even when I am feeling less than slave-ish. ~smiling~

Before you go to work, kneel and give him some words. Mine are "You are my Master, I am your slave, I am here to serve and please you as you deem fit."

Pick your own rituals. Do the little ritual things every single day that make you remember who you are and who he is. Just because he's doing the housework doesn't mean he's any less your Master.

_____________________________

You only lose what you cling to. ~~Gautama Sidharta

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~~Mother Teresa

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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/23/2007 11:53:35 AM   
ayasha


Posts: 149
Joined: 12/10/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: zindyslave

Well, I understand that but how do I make it seem right to myself that it is okay to let things slide when I want to do everything I can for him? It just seems unnatural to me, that he is doing house work instead of me. I guess I feel this way because of some of my friends that are in the lifestyle would tell me to suck it up and just do what I am supposed to do. I am just trying to think of ways that would justify me not doing what I am used to doing for him.


Don't listen to your friends, they are not who you need to please.  As long as your Master is happy with the situation, as long as He doesn't want things changed, that is what is important.  Maybe He enjoys doing the things around the house so that you don't have to - that way the two of you can spend quality time together when you are not working your retail job. 
 
If your Master does not have a complaint, then you ARE doing what you are supposed to do.

(in reply to zindyslave)
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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/23/2007 1:56:05 PM   
missturbation


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From: another planet
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8 hour shifts are pretty standard working days over here. I had taken a year out of work so was available to do all the house stuff whilst he was at work, it worked well.
Now i work 12 - 17 hours a day and he still works 8. We live seperately so i no longer have time to look after two houses to the standards he requires. Although not overly happy about doing his own cleaning he accepts my career is important and if he doesnt want a worn out slave he has to compromise with me.
As long as you are both happy with the situation then i don't see a problem.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/23/2007 2:46:25 PM   
DeSade401smo


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Joined: 7/23/2005
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I so understand how you feel.  When I moved in with Master, I had a full-time job with an extended workday and an extended commute.  When I got home, I tried to cook supper, clean up, get ready for work the next day, and spend time with Master.  He knew that I wanted to serve Him as much as possible but quickly put a halt and assigned what was important to him.  This agonized me as I wanted to serve Him in all ways possible - and it took awhile for it to sink in that I was serving Him.  He did not want a slave that was exhausted and running a million miles an hour.   

Remember, it is what your Master wants. If your Master is OK with your situation, then you are serving him.  That's it period.  The answer is that simple. 

(in reply to zindyslave)
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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/23/2007 2:53:51 PM   
atlbbwsubbie


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I also work in retail, and I work 12 hours days with an hour of travel time. Most of my shifts are back to back, so it's hard for me too. After awhile you get used to working the hours, and sleeping little.  And I promise eventually your feet will stop hurting :)

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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/23/2007 3:56:09 PM   
junecleaver


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Holy crap.  I remember when I first got the current sucky job I have now that involves standing all day, lifting heavy stuff, and dealing with assholes.  I would come home, get in the shower, and cry because my entire body hurt.  My feet felt like they were going to fall off.  My toes felt numb.  I felt like I was an 80 year old woman or something.

I bought some nice comfortable shoes.  I switch the shoes I wear to work weekly because it seems to reduce how much my feet hurt.  After the first few weeks, it wasn't so bad anymore.  My feet usually don't hurt.  My back only hurts on the days I have to lift really heavy stuff.  However, the dealing with assholes part has yet to get any better.  It definitely reminded me of WHY I want to finish my schooling.


_____________________________


"No one will ever win the battle of the sexes; there's too much fraternizing with the enemy. "
--Henry A. Kissinger

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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/23/2007 4:48:55 PM   
simplyangelic1


Posts: 186
Joined: 6/14/2006
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Why is it that we think Dominants aren't supposed to do anything but sit around while we wait on them hand and foot.  Are our preception so skewed that this is the only way that seems right?  My Master and I both work different shifts, it's not unusual for him to pick up around the house so that I don't have anything to do right away when I get home.  Likewise, his dinner is always ready when he gets home so that he can relax.  It's what people do when they care about the other. 

If your Master isn't having an issue with how things are then relax.  Just my thoughts on it.

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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/23/2007 5:13:37 PM   
Evlgryn


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Joined: 9/24/2004
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Do your best to survive the retail grind...Wear good supportive shoes with soft cushions to protect you from concrete floors..why do you think nurses pay so much for their shoes. And remember that concrete lurks milimeters below the carpet in retail stores. Use good nutritive small snacks three or four times a day instead of coffee. Three or four cafeine sodas is as bad as coffee. same for two teas.  Sit in the car and be antisocial , meditate during your break.  Be aware that the lighting, noise and distraction cause your system to run a mile a minute while doing nothing. I found tinted reading glasses really helped. Take a walk for lunch...strangely striding during an actual walk much different from the stop and go and standing around you do for your work week. And no... all that stooping and reaching can't take the place of excercise. Take a page from the boyscouts handbook and sit with your feet up during break.

When I was a manager for a New England chain we worked six days a week fairly regularly and our schedule included one twelve hour shift a week, they called it their "Iron Day". I asked them why and they said you work so hard you can  taste the blood in your mouth and it tastes like iron.

Instead of sliding from work to commute into an evening of unsatisfying television and online time....take a bath...take a catnap....take time to smell the roses. As a dominant I would tell you to put things in your car for your evening commute that remind you of your submissive routine. a note, a recording from your master,  a picture a mantra.. At least once a week try to transition from the work grind to some thrill in submission....would it kill you to drive home wearing ankle cuffs or wearing a small plug? Tell your mind and your body in no uncertain terms that work is over and you are going home for fun.  Play hard fall asleep exhausted, wake up, shower and do it all again the next day.

This is the reality of your life until you find a better job and good jobs with benefits are hard to find these days, so you  have to find a way to enjoy it.

Ken Evlgryn Domdefleursss



(in reply to simplyangelic1)
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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/23/2007 5:20:02 PM   
maybemaybenot


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You need a good pair of shoes !! Like junecleaver said. When I was floor nursing, I did a lot of double shifts and was on my feet a majority of the 16 hours. I wore Easy Spirit shoes, they are comfy and good support. Not very attractive, but I didn't really care about that. I also wore TED stockings. Those are the heavy elastic stockings you can get at a medical supply store. Maybe even a pharamcy. They kept my calves from aching. Try out some of those air insoles and hydro insoles.

The other thing I had, and still have and use is one of those inexpensive foot soak tubs. Like Dr. Scholl etc, that whirlpools the water and has bumps to rub the sole of your foot on. Get a good foot soak solution, preferably with Peppermint and take a half an hour to yourself when you get home and soak your feet for 15, then massage them for 5 with a Peppermint Lotion and then just put them up and relax. You don't evenhave to do this every day, but a three or five times a week will make your feet feel better. Of course that is dependant on your Master's approval, but I suspect he wouldn't object.
I am in agreement of what others have said, if this is what your Master needs/wants you to do to serve him best, and he is content to pick up some of the household duties.... well it's not up to you to try and change or alter that. I think that sometimes * we* < sub/slave>  think if we aren't physically doing chores, we aren't living up to our name. Our name is decided by our Master/Dominant and what he decides is in the best interest, not what we think it is.

Both of my previous Dominats loved to cook. I do also, but a good percentage of the time, they made the evening meal or breakfast on the weekends. I would have preferred to cook their meals exclusively, but they didn't want that, they wanted me to do other things.. so that is what I did. I never felt less submissive because they served me dinner. If that made them feel like they were taking care of their submissives body and nutrition, who was I to argue?

A task is only a submissive task, if it is requested/required by the Dominant/Master, IMO. If he decides to do a chore himself, then it is because that is what he wants to do, not him being submissive to me. < geeesh, I hope that makes sense>

                                   mbmbn

_____________________________

Tolerance of evil is suicide.- NYC Firefighter

When tolerance is not reciprocated, tolerance becomes surrender.

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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/23/2007 6:24:51 PM   
zindyslave


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Well, I guess the main problem I am having is that it isn't as clean as I like it to be. And he currently isn't on medication for his bi-polar and he gets angry easily and it just helps to get up and do things myself. But I am not working 8 hours every day just did for 3 days straight and my feet still hurt after being off all day. I just don't know how to help the situation and I know that I can do most of the things I used to as long as I don't have to work so many hours aday. I think I will talk to my boss about how many hours a day he is working me because he told me if I felt I was being worked to hard to let him know, I would rather work 6 or less hours a day. Which would help the whole situation. I was just wondering how other submissives/slaves dealt with it. The whole thing about me being submissive to him while working thing isn't really the deal because he would rather me work and do what I was doing before but he understands how my feet hurt after working a long shift. Currently he doesn't work because of the fact that he hasn't gotten a high school education or a GED and where we live they look down on that. He has applied at several places including the place I work he applied before I did, but I have a feeling the manager lost his application since he tends to lose things like that. So, he is home all day but I would like for him to get on some meds before working so he feels better mentally and physically and I would like to do things for him and work, but after not really working on my feet for going on 3 years it is hard to get in the swing of things again. I did go to school to work in an office but the thing about that is that there are no offices up here that are hiring and I needed a job now so I applied somewhere that would hire me now and well now I am working some where that I know will hurt my feet, back and shoulders and I feel like crap when I come home but I might not after just 4 hour shift which I have coming up. So, I guess we will see but when I am off of work I am expected to do things how can I when my feet still hurt? I am just confused about my whole role and trying to find my place again after it has been changed. If that makes any sense at all...Sorry if it doesn't let me know if you need clarification on any of it and I will try my best to clairfy it for you.

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Only when you see the invisible can you do the impossible.

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RE: Working long shifts and being a slave.... - 4/23/2007 7:03:47 PM   
liljoy


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Joined: 3/25/2004
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invest in some good shoes that won't hurt your feet. seriously the right shoes can make all the difference in the world

(in reply to zindyslave)
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