NewsFlash! Any lie can kill a relationship.

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NewsFlash! Any lie can kill a relationship. - 4/29/2005 11:52:12 AM

spiritedfem

Posts: 5
Joined: 3/8/2005
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I find myself getting furiously angry, with people who feel they need to misrepresent themselves in anyway because they don't wan to jeopardize some aspect or benefit they are trying to protect in a relationship. It doesn't mater what type of relationship it is. Any lie can kill relationships.
I have been in and out of a few relationships. The last one that ended the Lady broke it off with me because she felt i was not submissive enough. While i am sure that that was the feeling she chose as her catalyst for the reason to break up, i do not think that that was the honest reason. In the beginning the Lady told me she had 5 years experience in the lifestyle. What she failed to mention was that 99% of her experience was as a submissive. When i found out she was not an experienced Dominate my first thought was that "We all start somewhere...so giver her a chance". That turned out to be a big mistake on my part. She was unwilling to learn and had no idea how to intro-grate a submissive into her care. If anyone trys to learn form my bitch secion here my advice would be ... Be true to who and what you are in the lifestyle, but don't ignore the red flags. They will keep you from a world of hurt. And don't give up( i know i won't). There is good and bad out there on both sides of the lifestyle.

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RE: NewsFlash! Any lie can kill a relationship. - 4/29/2005 4:06:41 PM

sub4hire

Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
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Figure out a way to teach that far and wide to all and I'll stand beside you helping.

It does get old real fast.

(in reply to spiritedfem)

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RE: NewsFlash! Any lie can kill a relationship. - 4/29/2005 8:18:03 PM

MsSilvie

Posts: 248
Joined: 2/4/2005
Status: offline

I'm sure it is a very frustrating feeling. The end of a relationship isn't usually a good time for anyone. It could just be a bad match. You can have a good submissive, and a good Dom/me, and still just have a bad match. All the experience in the world doesn't make it a good match.

Be a little kind to yourself for a while, you deserve it.

(in reply to spiritedfem)

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RE: NewsFlash! Any lie can kill a relationship. - 4/30/2005 9:15:44 PM

dragonofjapan

Posts: 91
Joined: 6/30/2004
Status: offline

Well glad you could have that little rant.

Not to be too much of an asshole, but the brown hair and brown eyes are a dead give away, what lie did you tell yourself when you were overriding that inner voice?

Always easy to fix That person, I of course being perfic donne need no fixin meslef

_____________________________

He who rules truly serves
She who serves truly rules

Life is not measured by the breaths we take,
but by the things which take our breath away

Honor is not making good choices,
it is dealing with the consequences.

(in reply to MsSilvie)

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RE: NewsFlash! Any lie can kill a relationship. - 4/30/2005 10:49:27 PM

MsSilvie

Posts: 248
Joined: 2/4/2005
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Pardon me? You can tell so much about someone by hair color? And who exactly are you replying to here?

(in reply to dragonofjapan)

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RE: NewsFlash! Any lie can kill a relationship. - 5/1/2005 8:40:45 PM

angelinbondage

Posts: 30
Joined: 1/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSilvie

Pardon me? You can tell so much about someone by hair color? And who exactly are you replying to here?

It's an old schoolyard joke; if someone has brown eyes and hair, they are full of shit. I remember hearing about it in kindergarten.

(in reply to MsSilvie)

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RE: NewsFlash! Any lie can kill a relationship. - 5/2/2005 5:29:09 AM

MsSilvie

Posts: 248
Joined: 2/4/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: angelinbondage

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSilvie

Pardon me? You can tell so much about someone by hair color? And who exactly are you replying to here?

It's an old schoolyard joke; if someone has brown eyes and hair, they are full of shit. I remember hearing about it in kindergarten.

Seems about what I would expect from kindergarteners...

(in reply to angelinbondage)

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RE: NewsFlash! Any lie can kill a relationship. - 5/27/2005 2:05:33 PM

masterforyorlove

Posts: 18
Joined: 5/24/2005
Status: offline

I feel that anyone who does not have the Courage or the Strength to be their True Self from the beginning is not worth knowing anyway. She does not know herself, she does not know what she wants and she does not have the decency to admit her own faults. Be thankful that she did not waste any more of your energy.

In my own efforts to find a new Sub, I keep running across the same tired, old routine-people who think they can fool a Master. All I can do is pity them and move on to the next prospect.

(in reply to spiritedfem)

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RE: NewsFlash! Any lie can kill a relationship. - 5/27/2005 2:24:15 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: masterforyorlove

I feel that anyone who does not have the Courage or the Strength to be their True Self from the beginning is not worth knowing anyway. She does not know herself, she does not know what she wants and she does not have the decency to admit her own faults. Be thankful that she did not waste any more of your energy.

In my own efforts to find a new Sub, I keep running across the same tired, old routine-people who think they can fool a Master. All I can do is pity them and move on to the next prospect.

One -can- fool a master. Being a master or calling ones self a master doesn't remove you from the ability to get played, nor the ability to be lied to. Some people are GOOD liars. I don't think it is a personal fault to believe a lie that someone tells you. Nor do I think that one's role removes one from the ability to be lied to, nor to be fooled.

Too, it takes time to learn one's inner self. I'm not saying this person did the right thing in being non-disclosing. I am saying that not knowing exactly who one is doesn't make one less worthy of notice. Similarly, it takes a -lot- of things to be able to be out, especially if one is invovled in looked-down-on subcultures. I don't think it shows a lack of strenght to be unready to be out. I know that I, personally, would rock the very structures of my family if I came out to them (about my pansexuality). I'm not true to myself around them, because I carea bout them and because I like havinga relationship with them.

Again, this doesn't excuse lying, it does explain why someone might not be fully "true" to themselves. Also, knowing one's self is an ongoing process. I don't know exactly who I am, nor do I think I ever will. I'm going to keep evolving. It's not a crime to not know what you want, either. I think that is also a process. My need for submission and service is an ever evolving want. Still, not excusing not being upfront. Just saying that it's ok to be searching, to be questioning, and to -not- be certain. As long as one is honest.

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~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to masterforyorlove)

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