She left everything and no one had the money to put her up in a place of her own.
For the first three days she was wearing my clothes because she was affraid of what would happen if she went back to get her stuff and the ex was there.
Eventually we went back during a time we knew he'd be at work and gathard the stuff she knew she'd need like clothes and her credit cards.
She wasn't Masters girl right when she moved in... He gave her time to ajust and see if this is what she really wanted... it was over a week before he clamed her as his in any way.
As far as Master reassesing the situation, it's a little late for that. He mad a comitment to her, the same one he made to me when I was new. Just because something gets a little difficult doesn't mean he'll give up on either of us. I'd be long gone if he hadn't made that comitment to me. I don't expect or want him to tell her, "O, you're to broken for me right now. Go away untill your all better." If he said something like that to her, what would that mean for me if I have a hard scene and end up needing two or three weeks of aftercare? Cuz that basicly that we're doing with her, aftercare for two years of abuse.
OK, so there was no money to put her up somewhere on her own. What about a women's refuge? They are designed to deal with victims of abuse. And how is there money to keep her in your place since she apparently doesn't have a job or money coming in? I can understand the urge to take her in for a short while, but then she should be redirected to the help she needs and that is available to her. I am not saying you/Master should abandon her ... just that she is in no state to accept any relationship, let alone a poly D/s one. There would be nothing wrong in both of you befriending her, visiting her often, having her visit short term or overnight with you, gradually building it up. But I and several others here, feel that the way you have both gone about this is inappropriate. Putting concern for her aside temporarily, there is a real risk that what you and Master are doing could ultimately be seen as taking advantage of her vulnerability, and it could all backfire very badly somewhere down the track. Because even with the best intentions, what you are both doing could LOOK like abuse/preying on her/using her etc depending on how it was presented to authorities ... and do you both want a court case against you? She is in such a strange space right now that anything could change when she "comes to" ... and I have seen people in this sort of situation turn on those who tried to help. And even if she doesn't, perhaps she has some family or other friends who could get the wrong end of the stick and interfere, perhaps blaming you both for the state she is in. Without professional documentation of her state when she left the boyfriend, you haven't a leg to stand on in terms of proving whether you've helped or hindered.
Frankly I doubt your Master's soundness of judgement if He thought that a week was sufficient for her to adjust before "claiming her as His girl". I'd be thinking much more in terms of a year or more! I wouldn't claim anyone I knew for a week ... at very best, they'd be under My consideration for training! And even then, that would be moving faster than I ever have with someone. Master and i had known each other for 3 years and lived together 24/7 for 2 of those years before He collared me. And i wasn't in the emotional mess this girl is obviously in. As to what it would mean to you ... well surely, you and she are two separate people in two very different situations and states of mind. Are you seriously saying your Master would treat you both the same?? He should be exercising His judgement independently concerning the two of you ... and what is the best for one (His aftercare) shouldn't necessarily apply to the other who seems to need so much more.
I'm now left concerned for both of you girls!
Maam Jay aka violet[A]
There is risk in everything.
Yes, she might turn around when she "comes to" and do something unexpected, but so might the play date you beat on till they are black and blue. We just have to decide is it an exceptable risk for what we are getting out if it.
As for the week of waiting... Master waited that long to put a symbole of ownership on her. There are still things that Master has always done with me that he refuses to do with her.
She knows that if she wants to leave at any moment Master and I will help her pack her bags and give her a kiss good bye when we drop her off at her mom's. We are trying to do everything possable to make sure she doesn't feel like she has no other option. Even if she chooses not to be girl an d doesn't have anywhere to go she will not be kicked out... She will be renting the atic apartment if that happens.
Sinse I origiopnally posted this thread things have changed, she has a job, she's helping more around the house, she is comunicating with Master and I a little more on how she's feeling. Somethings still need to be worked on, such as her fear of the male sex... I'm sure you can agree that because of abuse it is logical that she has some sort of fear of men and intamicy with them. She is a straight girl who fears being intamate with me... that has to be confusing.
I am feeling much better about Master's choice to keep her.
What ever happens will happen... if in 3 months she's ready to go out on her own then she will... we do nothing to her that she doesn't request first, mainly because we don't know he well enoght to go, "Yea, she can take two needles in her chest" with out her requesting it first, usually she needs to request it several times and show that this is what she wants us to do.
The only play she does at the moment is puppy play, which is a very good choice for her (no marks and she has a chance to escape)
So, at this point I feel that things are ok. We are taking it one day at a time with her and she seems to be responding well to the positive envierment.