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master owns my heart but lied to me - 5/29/2004 8:05:25 PM

Posts: 2
Joined: 5/28/2004
From: penna!
Status: offline

hi can anyone help me plse

this wonderful master from texas found me the middle of april. didnt waste time on line. called me for hours and hours. sent me postcards - he is relocating to my state of pa for a job. finally last weekend i met him and he took me to a bondage bbq. we have a wonderful time.

however he wont have sex w me. i just found out he has a gf in texas who he loves. he asked her to come w him and she refused.

i didnt sign up to be a whipping post only. i care about him and need him. but if i am not having sex i dont see how i can stay. he presented sex as part of the package . plus he has not placed a collar on me though i realize it is very early for that however i need the physical

however i have offered him to stay in my home until his is completed what do i do plse?

RE: master owns my heart but lied to me - 5/29/2004 8:16:45 PM

Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline

Reading this, I wonder if this person is one who lied to you to give himself a place to live while he relocates. I dont really know your situation, but if it were me he would come home some day to changed locks and his stuff in the front yard.

Even if you dont go that route, do you really want to try to have a relationship with somebody who lies to you?

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle

(in reply to saphirezdrem)

"Master" of nothing...WAS: owns my heart - 5/29/2004 8:46:22 PM

Posts: 11
Joined: 4/25/2004
From: Minneapolis MN Area
Status: offline

I feel for your pain and loss. You have been manipulated skillfully by an ABUSER who is "Master" of nothing.

You are new enough to the lifestyle that he brought you to a point of considering a "Permenant" or 24/7 arrangement based solely upon your deep need to submit...and this is most probably because you hunger so to be treated with kindness, firmness, dignity and respect at a level never before experienced.

This man (I use the term loosely, lest I insult the entire male half of the human race of which this overgrown BOY with the outrageously LOW self-esteem, has falsely convinced himself he is a functioning part, hiding his MOUSE tendancies behind whatever other ABUSES he calls his "dominance") is not YOUR Master, because by his lying to you he has proven just how little Mastery he has over himself.

I do not need to be your Master, Little Sister, to see that the gift of submission you wanted to give him, is worth MUCH more than that. I do not need to know him to know that at the end of the day, he acted without honor...and not only because he refuses to make love to you.

Instead, I encourageyou to keep searching for someone who WILL honor you with the truth.

RESPECTS,
PeacefulTop

(in reply to saphirezdrem)

RE: master owns my heart but lied to me - 5/29/2004 9:02:01 PM

Posts: 765
Joined: 5/10/2004
From: New Castle, PA
Status: offline

saphirezdream

you met me at the bbq (bald guy in flame pants and demon tshirt) - please contact me offsite at my email [email protected] for my reply not only to this but also to things from the bbq

_____________________________

Apply Usual Caveats Here

An expert is somone who has made all the mistakes there are to be made

(in reply to saphirezdrem)

RE: master owns my heart but lied to me - 5/29/2004 10:29:51 PM

Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

saphire, what the hell is wrong with you? A wonderful master? How is he wonderful? Wonderful at lying? Wonderful at playing games?
How much clearer can it be? He is dishonest. He lied and led you on. And you still are expecting a collar from him?
Here's my advice. Get ready for a bad time.

(in reply to saphirezdrem)

RE: master owns my heart but lied to me - 5/29/2004 11:14:49 PM

Posts: 4
Joined: 5/23/2004
Status: offline

child,
This person you call a 'wonderful Master' is little more than a pariah. he will continue to use and abuse you until he no longer needs you or your address. I understand your need for a Master in your life, but it is a long slow process that leads to collaring. A little advice, for what it's worth, next time, get to know him first. All relationships, most particularly the type W/we have chosen, must be based on friendship, honesty and compatability. Only after these have been established should you begin to consider a relationship. Send this bozo to the nearest motel and let him whip the bed.

(in reply to saphirezdrem)

RE: master owns my heart but lied to me - 5/30/2004 6:30:00 AM

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

what do i
do plse?

wakeup!
ummmm what happen to lifestyle protical?

has anyone told you what a contract is?

no collar no ownership no commitment

duhh your a free ride and it sounds like
a mini vacation too. LOL

Can I come stay for a week end too??

Im really good at usin whipping posts?

seriously
I do not
see
Master
material
here but
user/abuser
*stuff*
kick the dog
out and let
it run back
to its Owner
He was just
looking for
a free place
to stay while
He relocated
and if lucky
sum free
sessions with
sumone that
could be
taken advantage
of. Either accept
what you allready
allowed in the
way it is or get
outta the cooker.
It takes two to be
used so exit the
equation.

(in reply to DomSatyr)

RE: master owns my heart but lied to me - 5/30/2004 6:31:40 AM

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

oh please excuse My entry into the Masters section Masters I just realized it was posted here after I clicked the lil button ~smiles~

(in reply to MistressDREAD)

RE: "Master" of nothing...WAS: owns my heart - 5/30/2004 7:24:36 AM

stormiKnightBEAR

Posts: 306
Joined: 3/14/2004
Status: offline

stormi hopes that the girl in the post pays close attention to your words.

A person on the phone and online are alot different than face to face.
A person on line can be honorable........ because no one can see what
they truely are. It's easy when left to the imagination.

It's the waking up in the morning beside him/her that can show the truth.

stormi's suggest is simple.......... pack up the part of you that feels like you
care for this man and RUN! Tell him "sorry charlie brown" snoopy is in the house
however his dawg house is available" and provide a hotel number.

good luck,
stormi
whitesilk property of Master Bear

_____________________________

owned white silk slave of TEMJI aka Master Bear

PROUD TO BE TEXAN AND AMERICAN BY BIRTH~
GOD BLESS TEXAS AND THE U.S.A !!!!

(in reply to PeacefulTop)

RE: "Master" of nothing...WAS: owns my heart - 5/30/2004 12:21:23 PM

Posts: 127
Joined: 4/28/2004
From: Delaware
Status: offline

Okay, here I go again, being the bearer of strange things but....

A Dom moves from TX to PA and she has offered to let him live in her home....BEFORE she even met him?

In my opinion, until there is a face to face meeting...everything should be suspect. Many people online lie, either a little bit or a lot a bit....

I understand the frustration, however, she said " I OFFERED" to let him stay in my home, she didn't say " He moved in without permission". Though this guy MAY be a liar....how does that equate with him being abusive?

As was stated in another thread...we (submissives) MUST be responsible for ourselves.

In answer to your question saphirezdrem "What do I do?"......my question back would be " What do you WANT to do?"

(in reply to stormiKnightBEAR)

RE: "Master" of nothing...WAS: owns my heart - 5/30/2004 12:28:55 PM

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

quote:

Though this guy MAY be a liar....how does that equate with him being abusive?

It's a matter of how you define "abuse". So far there doesn't seem to have been any physical abuse, but i feel he is using her and i find that abusive. Also i would categorize lying as emotionally abusive.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to indigo302)

RE: "Master" of nothing...WAS: owns my heart - 5/30/2004 1:24:08 PM

Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline

quote:

It's a matter of how you define "abuse". So far there doesn't seem to have been any physical abuse, but i feel he is using her and i find that abusive. Also i would categorize lying as emotionally abusive.

I have to agree with this statement. He used dishonesty to get himself in a position to use her to her disadvantage with no regard for her needs, emotionally or financially or anything else. Sounds like an abusive relationship to me. Abuse is not about whether he physically hits her, it is whether he comes into her (or his) world and makes them less of a person. There is no way this could equate with TPE where both parties end up bigger and richer from the interaction.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle

(in reply to proudsub)

RE: "Master" of nothing...WAS: owns my heart - 5/30/2004 1:54:10 PM

Posts: 2
Joined: 5/28/2004
From: penna!
Status: offline

hi thanks for the response

the thing of the matter is that i invited him here w all that he promised me. sex and a relationship collaring etc etc for example he promised to take me to the beach and wanted to know what i wanted him to do to me etc etc

then he tells me of his gf after he has caught my mind that he loves her. first time he told me he asked me how i felt about that and i said i didnt care. he was like oh ok. now i do care. he had me so mentally there that when i met him on saturday i didnt care who got out of the car he owned me i wanted him . he has made me recite a mantra for 2 months about now to him- i am your property you own me my life is to serve you. i truly wanted nothing more than to kneel at his feet and recite this to him

persons at an event we attended said he should have never left me on clothes pins as long as he did- did my warm me up for whipping me - that he should have never stripped me immediately in public before i got to know anyone . i dont know what is right and what is wrong on this that could cause me physical harm

he started out as a friend leading to a master who accepted me to now it seems that i am a whipping post.

someone who spent hours talking to me in real life today in person said that w how he has controlled my mind at this point this person believes i will need to be released from him based on how he has screwed my mind. i am a person of my word and trying desperately to understand what i have gotten into. this master called me for hours sent me postcards - of course a single girl looking for ownership would want thsi attention? part of me knows that there are wrong things about this

but how do you break your own psychological hold on yourself? when part of you says he does own you i mean i am a mess and have 2 days to find out what to do . i am trying to keep busy meeting others gleaning thier guidance it is helping make me stronger

so thank you to everyone!!

i appreciate everyone s help

(in reply to indigo302)

RE: "Master" of nothing...WAS: owns my heart - 5/30/2004 6:51:39 PM

Posts: 127
Joined: 4/28/2004
From: Delaware
Status: offline

Everyone has different ideas of what is right or wrong, saphirezdrem. What is right for one is wrong for another...which is why I tell those who are new to READ READ READ, as well as talk with MANY people when first starting out. Go to munches. Go to real life submissive support groups. Go to demos put on by groups in your area.

There are MANY good websites and books out there just waiting for people to gleen information.

There are those who like to do long warmups, and those who prefer to do no warmup...I've been with both kinds, I have my own preference, but other subs enjoy the opposite of me.

Whether or not your Dom should have had you strip in front of strangers, only you can say if that was right or wrong for you and he...there is no rule.

Did you and he discuss his desires, your desires as far as a D/s relationship goes?

It might also help to do a bit of soul searching, to look up information and see what's right for you....make a list of those qualities you want in a Dom, a D/s relationship, and draw the line there.

indi

(in reply to saphirezdrem)

RE: "Master" of nothing...WAS: owns my heart - 5/30/2004 8:59:57 PM

Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

saphire you are a predators' dream. He tells you that he has a gf that he loves, and all you say is you don't care? He tells you there will be no sex, and you are still planning on having him stay with you? He treats you in public in a way that you aren't comfortable with and you still say you want to kneel at his feet?
You are a big girl. Hopefully you will learn from this. But there is a reason that warning signs appear. Now whether you choose to read them is another matter.

(in reply to saphirezdrem)

RE: "Master" of nothing...WAS: owns my heart - 5/30/2004 10:09:24 PM

stormiKnightBEAR

Posts: 306
Joined: 3/14/2004
Status: offline

saphirezdrem,

stormi has read your post and is in utter shock.
Did you agree to all this BEFORE he made you strip at the party
of people that you did not know? Did he know them well enough
to instruct you to do so? Or was he trying to be the big bad
new dom from outta state?

stormi is curious how many can confuse reality with online and
assume they are one in the same?

Sorry to say... the .... idjit is from Texas.... <God Help US, there are
a few that need to be banned from the state> but he is looking for a
place to stay without assuming any of the responsibility of a *border*
after all you are providing him with a bed and breakfast type of place, is
he paying up front for this?

Something that does not seem to be evident in your statements, is HIS
control. YOU are the one asking how to break his hold yet you admit that
his hold is actually the hold you have convinced yourself that he has on
you. WAKE up.....sorry but it seems you are in a fantasy world and nothing more.

stormi once again would recommend you pull your submissive self up
dust off the mistake and tell him "sorry charlie but snoopy is in the house
for the next year" however the DOG HOUSE is available and provide the
numbers of a very nice hotel/motel and one that is cheap.

stormi hopes you really give all this some thought before letting him in.
As a matter of fact, stormi would love to know who this ........ man is.
Especially if he's from the Dallas or Houston areas.

Best of luck saphirezdrem cuz it seems you will need it.

stormi
whitesilk property of Master Bear

_____________________________

owned white silk slave of TEMJI aka Master Bear

PROUD TO BE TEXAN AND AMERICAN BY BIRTH~
GOD BLESS TEXAS AND THE U.S.A !!!!

(in reply to saphirezdrem)

RE: master owns my heart but lied to me - 5/30/2004 10:38:45 PM

Posts: 9
Joined: 1/9/2004
Status: offline

Your Story is the type that really pisses me off...As a Master and trainer. I can not stand the way low life ass wipes are using the Master/slave lifestyle to rip people off in every way.

First off...the dead give away that something was wrong is when he wanted to call you right away.There is nothing wrong with talking to each other on the phone. It will happen and must happen before you both meet. However it has been my experience that The real Masters I know,myself included want to get to know you a little through your words and emails before we talk with you on the phone.

There are so many married men or those men that have a GF,that just want to make sure that they have another female lined up before they lose or drop the one they are with.

I know the person you are talking about and I know for a fact that his GF made it clear she was not going to move with him...and yes I have heard that he bragged that he could find a subbie female to move in with till he was on his feet in the new town.

His words were "subbie's are easy,they are so needy they will jump at any offer from a man that calls himself a Master."

its sad to say,but it seems to be true in a lot of cases. If a Sub female receives emails from a man and the emails do contain certain words,lingo,etc...then they are very quick to dis-miss him as a fake and wanna be.

However those that are dishonest,those that are fakes,lairs,etc...their emails will always have just the right amount of lingo,a bullshit to make you fall for it.

Next time you receive a reply from a man...read his reply and compare it to others you have received from the fakes that have torn you heart apart.

Then you'll know what I talking about in this reply.

A true Master does not have time to write long run on replies...and we will not send you cards or flowers...those would come after there is a relationship not before.

You know it is said that the man is ruled by his little head and that is true for most.
However a woman is ruled by her feelings and not her brain,if she reads a reply that seems to speak to her she will fall for it...Don't...use your head....there will be plenty of time to let go and let feelings take over.
RW

(in reply to saphirezdrem)

RE: master owns my heart but lied to me - 5/31/2004 1:52:21 AM

Posts: 9
Joined: 5/6/2004
Status: offline

It seems some people cannot read...
First what are all these subs doing answering questions in Ask a Master, second her complaint is she is not getting any and is not collared.

On the first, take your subby selves over to ask a submissive and stay there.

On the second, without some comment from her Master I would draw no conclusion except that she needs to talk to him and get a clear understanding of what he intends.

It sounds like she talked with him plenty before they met and he is not doing what he said, then she has the choice of refusing to be with him or to be with him. As for the rest of it, seems she was perfectly ok with it until she did not get what she wanted.

saphirezdrem
you have at this point not been collared, and you have the choice. I will warn you though for future reference. Many in the Master slave relationship treat slaves exactly as you are being treated, if it is not for you then get out now and hopefullly you have learned something.

There is indeed the possibility that he is looking for a free ride while working there, know up front, when he is done he could well go home to his girlfriend, wife or whatever she is. This is something you need to ask him about before you let him back into your home.

My advice, decide what you are willing to do, contact him and meet him somewhere public. If you do not feel the answers he gives are honest, then you know and you can do as you please from there.
If you believe he is lying to you I would hit the road regardless of how you feel.

Some last points...

Sex with slaves is often withheld for training purposes (not sure that is the case here).

There are telltales for when clothespins have been on to long and if you do not trust that he knows you should not let him do it. (or anything else for that matter)

If I took a slave to a BDSM BBQ, munch or anything else focusing on this she would be naked and in her chains and collar the moment we walked through the door, unless the rules of said gathering required certain etiquette in that department.

Last but not least, the Master slave relationship is the most dangerous and requires the deepest commitment, on the part of the slave. The Master has no such requirement. You are after all, just a slave, if you have negotiated more great but this is the bottom line. Some people take care of their property, some do not, human nature.

The sad part is of course that many who claim to be Masters are simply looking for sex or money and know nothing of the slave, that is the risk inherent to giving up control, and choices to someone who knows not what control or choices are.

I hope you find the kind of Master you seek and not the dog kickers.

Z

(in reply to Ravenwood)

RE: master owns my heart but lied to me - 5/31/2004 2:36:47 AM

Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Zues, who the hell made you God? You are another example of a someone with Master in their nick being a moron. If you haven't noticed, subs, slaves, Doms and Dommes are free to post anywhere they like on this website.
And the advice most of these subs have given is better than yours anyway. Get off your high horse.

(in reply to MasterZues)

RE: master owns my heart but lied to me - 5/31/2004 2:48:07 AM

Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline

quote:

On the first, take your subby selves over to ask a submissive and stay there.

If the moderators of this web site do not take issue with people self-identifying as submissives / slaves posting to this thread, my recommendation to you, MasterZeus, is if you do not wish to read what others write, then skip past those you feel are beneath your station.

However, I would respectfully ask that you not make judgements for me, or ask others to not post where I can read what they write, on sites I am a part of.

Regards,

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle

(in reply to Estring)

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