ShiftedJewel
Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004 Status: offline
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quote:
I am not saying this by any means...you misunderstood the meaning of what I was trying to say and I think it is my fault for not clearly explaining it.....I will try and explain this as best I can.....If I join a group, site, whatever about building model airplanes, I wouldn't contact another member and say "hey, how about them Yankees". The same goes with a fetish personal, you start off using the fetish as a common interest then you move on to other things. I fully agree with the line of thought that you need to get to know the woman as well as the domme...I just think the domme comes first, then the woman. I hope this makes clearer what I was trying to say! Thank you so much for taking the time to clarify what you meant... and if you consider wiitwd to be a hobby then it also makes sense. Personally I've never considered going to a hobby board and seeking a partner... ok, that was uncalled for, forgive me please. But I will run with your line of thinking. If you are writing these Dominas with the express intention of gaining knowledge concerning a particular fetish you share then it would make sense to cut through the small talk... But.... using your example again here... would you seriously discuss, indepth, building small airplanes with someone, get to know how they feel about it, where they fly them at and all that and then base a relationship on that information? Most likely not, why? Because people in strong solid relationships often have totally different hobbies that neither take away nor add to each others lives. That's where the difference lies... this is NOT a hobby, it is a way of living, expressing or acting in a relationship and what you are dealing with very much effects the lives of everyone involved. So I guess it depends on how you view wiitwd, if you see it as a hobby then I understand the approach, but if you see it as a search for a relationship then perhaps you should reconsider how you approach these WOMEN. Think about the fact that simply because they are dominant individuals and are generally accustomed to setting the rules of engagement does not mean they don't like to hear about or talk about subjects outside of the dungeon. Someone here once made a comment about feeling like a flogger with legs..... I like that visual because it truly states how so many of us are made to feel when a submissive wants to know nothing more then how well we swing one. Jewel
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Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.
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