RE: Are most dommes fin dommes?

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RE: Are most dommes fin dommes? - 5/4/2014 6:00:23 PM

FieryOpal

Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline

Don't leave out disliking being a human ashtray also!

quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

The chances of your success increase if you dislike cross dressing, diapers, and human toilet fixations.

OP, you should have a higher success rate because you don't appear to be attached or sneaking around on your wife and are apparently available for a committed relationship. Even if someone is in an open marriage, they are not fully available to devote their time and energy to another relationship. No unattached relationship-seeking (non-poly) woman wants to feel like a side course and not the main entrée. Only a for-hire Domme would be willing to overlook this and accept a partial ownership arrangement, for the most part.

You haven't hidden your appearance in your profile, your picture doesn't look dated or overly professional (i.e., not a stolen Internet pic), you look pleasant and attractive, and sound like a good prospect.

The main hindrance I can see is that you are a switch, and many Dommes are highly suspicious of switches potentially not being capable of being submissive *enough.* This isn't how I feel personally, but you have to keep in mind that we Dommes have a hard time as it is finding suitable submissives who are sincerely compliant, trustworthy and reliable (not flaky), without having to concern ourselves with males who tend to cop attitudes and want their needs gratified at the expense of what we want.

As a switch, you have to work harder at demonstrating that you can accept authority and don't have a hidden agenda. I hate to tell you this, but the fact that you are Actively Seeking Dominant women AND submissive women, as well as switch women, counts against you with BOTH Dommes AND subs. I know it's not fair, but I'm just telling it to you straight. Instead of getting the best of all worlds, you are getting the best of none of them.

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Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

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RE: Are most dommes fin dommes? - 5/5/2014 4:21:53 PM

amazonglamour

Posts: 17
Joined: 4/23/2014
From: NY
Status: offline

Honestly, I resent the comparison to a prostitute. For a lot of girls, it's an acting job. It's no different than being a phone sex worker, just more independent. I know a few girls up at school who do it just for the cash and honestly, if people are willing to pay for it, what's wrong with asking for/accepting the money?

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Post #: 42

RE: Are most dommes fin dommes? - 5/5/2014 4:35:12 PM

deathtothepixies

Posts: 683
Joined: 2/19/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

Okay, I'm not a fin domme, but I'll tell you what I do do. , if some random dude just wants a fetish-delivery system, he will need to fork over some $$.

NBMG

Sorry to trim your quote and please feel free to keep rationalising it any way you like but....

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Post #: 43

RE: Are most dommes fin dommes? - 5/5/2014 6:17:27 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

Deathtothepixies,

It's my understanding that FinDommes are in it primarily for $$ and they don't necessarily give anything in return for it. If that's incorrect, maybe someone will come along and enlighten me. What I said sounds more like the man is getting something for his $$ - which he IS - more like a ProDomme than a FinDomme situation. Actually, for what it's worth, I only do that for ONE person. Otherwise, any D/s encounters I'm part of have absolutely nothing at all to do with money. If you want to call me something then go ahead, but tag me as a part-time Pro, that would fit better than a FinDomme I think, since the man actually IS getting something for his money.

NBMG

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RE: Are most dommes fin dommes? - 5/5/2014 8:27:36 PM

ThePrincessKali

Posts: 424
Joined: 9/19/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

Deathtothepixies,

It's my understanding that FinDommes are in it primarily for $$ and they don't necessarily give anything in return for it. If that's incorrect, maybe someone will come along and enlighten me. What I said sounds more like the man is getting something for his $$ - which he IS - more like a ProDomme than a FinDomme situation. Actually, for what it's worth, I only do that for ONE person. Otherwise, any D/s encounters I'm part of have absolutely nothing at all to do with money. If you want to call me something then go ahead, but tag me as a part-time Pro, that would fit better than a FinDomme I think, since the man actually IS getting something for his money.

NBMG

I wouldn't really consider it "getting nothing for your money," because for financial subs the fetish is the action of giving their money away, having it taken, or purchasing gifts for dominant women. So what they are getting is their fetish fulfilled. A lot of Fin Dommes are also Pro Dommes (at least from my POV) as they do online sessions. Sometimes they are more kink in nature and sometimes they are just ordering subs to make purchases or tribute as they tell him to. Sometimes subs are also so enchanted by the Domme that they want to buy her gifts or tribute her so she notices them because they otherwise feel inferior. It's kind of a strange concept to those who haven't experienced it. The first time I was approached by a Fin Sub asking if he could buy me gifts for no reason, I was very surprised as well lol.

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RE: Are most dommes fin dommes? - 5/6/2014 5:37:48 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

Thank you Kali. That makes sense.

NBMG

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RE: Are most dommes fin dommes? - 5/6/2014 7:29:46 PM

bearcatw125

Posts: 17
Joined: 6/22/2008
Status: offline

My advice would be to get offline and communicate with people in the flesh. The profiles online are essentially built for those who don't want a personal relationship. Get out into the local scene and you will have significantly improved your odds at meeting someone. There is no guarantee that you will have more success offline than online, it is guaranteed that you will only have to pay for your own food and drink in order to start a conversation with someone at a munch.

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Post #: 47