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Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/11/2014 9:49:44 PM

Posts: 8
Joined: 9/4/2014
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Good evening fellow Dommes... please excuse spelling, as the keyboard gets stuck some times. ( 3 kids will do that)
My question is more for conversational purpose. For one, yes, I do charge for sessions etc. this is a job for me as well as being an "entertainer"
I do not allow my clients to have any sexual indulgence by giving into the "porn image" they may have. Some wonder why I charge for sessions..
well it is a job for me. Not that they shouldn't want to treat me for my efforts but if they aren't that kind I will remind them it would make me happy.

Why would a dome not want to be compensated for their time, especially since it's not their significant other etc. Just because some of us require payment
for bookings does not mean we are fake. Why would someone consider even calling someone fake due to seeking financial domination, and or paying tribute.

Any thoughts and comments are appreciated. I enjoy hearing from others in the trade.

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 1:29:20 AM

Posts: 2969
Joined: 4/3/2007
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It depends what your time is?

A brief look at your profile and I have to say, for the amount you are charging...high end...top rate, you look very amateur. No dungeon? no website? no tools of the trade? If your going to be a pro then at least put a little effort in.

_____________________________

My store is http://e-stimstore.com

(in reply to YesmamRuby)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 3:35:39 AM

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: YesmamRuby

Good evening fellow Dommes... please excuse spelling, as the keyboard gets stuck some times. ( 3 kids will do that)
My question is more for conversational purpose. For one, yes, I do charge for sessions etc. this is a job for me as well as being an "entertainer"
I do not allow my clients to have any sexual indulgence by giving into the "porn image" they may have. Some wonder why I charge for sessions..
well it is a job for me. Not that they shouldn't want to treat me for my efforts but if they aren't that kind I will remind them it would make me happy.

Why would a dome not want to be compensated for their time, especially since it's not their significant other etc. Just because some of us require payment
for bookings does not mean we are fake. Why would someone consider even calling someone fake due to seeking financial domination, and or paying tribute.

Any thoughts and comments are appreciated. I enjoy hearing from others in the trade.

Yeah, you'll get whiners for prospective clients. I've read dozens if not hundreds of posts from sub men complaining that they can't get pro sessions for free.

If they call you fake, ask them if they're just whining and willing to pay, or unwilling. If they're honestly not willing, stop the conversation right there. You're trying to earn money, not get into arguments.

Most of the women here are lifestyle, not pros. Hell, I'm not even a woman (although I have as friends several pros). You make the note that, if they won't pay, you'll still play with them if they are an SO. Many men, oddly, don't get that distinction.

I suspect some of your balking clients are married and their wife sees any credit card transactions, and they're hoping to get freebies if they complain enough.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to YesmamRuby)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 6:08:26 AM

Posts: 12
Joined: 2/23/2014
Status: offline

As long as you're being honest upfront about everything, they're just whining. It would be no different than going into Subway and demanding a free sandwich and then calling them a "fake" restaurant when they won't give it to you.

(in reply to DarkSteven)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 12:21:22 PM

Posts: 1
Joined: 9/6/2014
Status: offline

Hmm. I love financial domination but also a lot of other niches in the bdsm world. But I do love a tribute from my slaves, I think it shows the extra bit of respect and adoration. However, my real life slave doesn't always pay, I trust him enough to give me something whenever he can miss it. Online is a different thing, make sure nobody's wasting your time!

(in reply to Gradschoolgirl)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 12:47:59 PM

Posts: 985
Joined: 4/11/2012
From: Toronto, Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven
Yeah, you'll get whiners for prospective clients. I've read dozens if not hundreds of posts from sub men complaining that they can't get pro sessions for free.

If they call you fake, ask them if they're just whining and willing to pay, or unwilling. If they're honestly not willing, stop the conversation right there. You're trying to earn money, not get into arguments.

Most of the women here are lifestyle, not pros. Hell, I'm not even a woman (although I have as friends several pros). You make the note that, if they won't pay, you'll still play with them if they are an SO. Many men, oddly, don't get that distinction.

I suspect some of your balking clients are married and their wife sees any credit card transactions, and they're hoping to get freebies if they complain enough.

MariaB's post is interesting... Perhaps it is not that they are unwilling to pay, but that they are concerned they will pay, and not get their money's worth?

I also saw nothing in the profile that appeared to justify the rates... or entice a customer.

If I sold cars and advertised that I sold quality cars at top rates, but don't ask for any information about what you are buying before you pay half up front "you cheap ignorant ass whole" (although I would spell it properly) I would not be at all surprised that people might press me for more information, or assume I was a scam.

< Message edited by Bhruic -- 9/12/2014 12:54:52 PM >

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(in reply to DarkSteven)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 12:56:41 PM

Posts: 1082
Joined: 5/30/2013
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Bhruic

MariaB's post is interesting... Perhaps it is not that they are unwilling to pay, but that they are concerned they will pay, and not get their money's worth?

I also saw nothing in the profile that appeared to justify the rates... or entice a customer.

What?? A grainy selfie doesn't merit 250 bucks an hour??

(in reply to Bhruic)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 2:22:37 PM

Posts: 8
Joined: 9/4/2014
Status: offline

No a selfie doesn't merit $250 an hour... I didn't say I was charging $250 for a selfie. I said it was for sessions. Also it's not my fantasy there fore I will not dream up a fantasy and role play for FREE. Point blank period. I do have equipment and have done this for a little while. I will not say I have 5+ years like some... but I do have 2 years of professional experience. The what will they get... that is why I have the list of things I am willing to do. Asking for information is also different then trying to start a cyber sex session. Think of it like going to wal mart you but something your not guaranteed that your eggs won't crack before you get home, but you pay for them ahead of time...and you also know you can exchange them for another that's not broken. Same concept.

(in reply to littleladybug)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 2:38:26 PM

Posts: 4
Joined: 9/5/2011
Status: offline

No its not the same as going into Subway and complaining for a freebie, if subway were putting themselves on a site for people who like the sandwich world, then saying "oh but I charge for it" "but i do like making them really i do".

its a big con, your a sex worker, if you allow them to cum or not, its a sexual attraction that brings the blind fools to you and you know it........

(in reply to YesmamRuby)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 5:05:04 PM

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexstarvedcuck

No its not the same as going into Subway and complaining for a freebie, if subway were putting themselves on a site for people who like the sandwich world, then saying "oh but I charge for it" "but i do like making them really i do".

its a big con, your a sex worker, if you allow them to cum or not, its a sexual attraction that brings the blind fools to you and you know it........

It'd make your argument better about this not being equivalent to a subway if you gave a rationale instead of a flat statement.

Why is she a con? She states up front what she offers and how much she charges. It's not a bait and switch at all.

Perhaps you think she should work for free?

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to sexstarvedcuck)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 11:19:05 PM

Posts: 4
Joined: 9/5/2011
Status: offline

No D.S I don't think this "lifestyle" should be classed as "work" at all, they are manipulating the fact that in reality there are so few "real" Dommes out there, they are taking advantage of the sexual desires of some sub men, in this particular case she hasn't even spent any money on setting up so my argument is even more valid.

But you know what, reading your earlier replies plus the fact you viewed my profile I just knew you were going to reply, you keep sucking up to them if you like but I'm speaking the truth, most people on this site know it too.

There's an elephant in the room !!

(in reply to DarkSteven)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 11:22:48 PM

Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline

Says "sex starved cuck" who has a rubber clad Barbarella as his avatar. Right, completely unselfish thoughts, you benevolent soul. I even shower with my rubber catsuit on, it never comes off.

_____________________________

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http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to sexstarvedcuck)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 11:45:16 PM

Posts: 4
Joined: 9/5/2011
Status: offline

GM, please tell me your not really that stupid......What the hell do my thoughts have to do with this debate ?, I've used a generic picture on my profile so my opinion don't count.......really !! I obviously make no secret that I'm into the scene so what's your point love ?? I still know a hooker when I see/hear one

(in reply to GoddessManko)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/12/2014 11:47:58 PM

Posts: 4
Joined: 9/5/2011
Status: offline

GM, I also notice on your profile that you say "NO PAY FOR PLAY" , "I'M NOT A SEX WORKER" so it would seem you agree with me .......

(in reply to sexstarvedcuck)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/13/2014 12:49:01 AM

Posts: 182
Joined: 1/3/2011
From: San Mateo, CA
Status: offline

If you want people to take you seriously at whatever you do, you have to put on the front that you take yourself seriously. This is especially true with any sort of professional D/s services (as well as sex workers). Get some good photos done, trash those selfies, they're terrible. You appear to be about 20 times more attractive than those photos show. You're doing yourself a disservice by even using them. Set yourself up with a wix or similar free domain website. Get yourself a "ho phone" preferrably a prepaid virgin mobile or cricket and use it ONLY for business. Do not re-route your calls to your personal phone. Hopefully you've already done that.

I have been a professional Fetishist for roughly 10 years, started out as a Dominatrix for 1 1/2 years. I started young and it was a curve to learn the right ways to do things. The more professional you appear, the better your clientele will be. Trust me and good luck

P.S. Matching Lingerie, makeup/styling and no cut off bodyparts helps too. BE your brand.

< Message edited by PandoraFoxxx -- 9/13/2014 12:51:41 AM >

(in reply to sexstarvedcuck)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/13/2014 3:02:26 AM

MissKittyDeVine

Posts: 1054
Joined: 9/24/2011
Status: offline

OP, mentioning money, especially specific rates, is likely to get your profile pulled. Best read up on TOS.

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Sanity is overrated. Live la vida loca

(in reply to PandoraFoxxx)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/13/2014 9:37:17 AM

Posts: 1153
Joined: 1/20/2014
From: South Florida
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexstarvedcuck

No D.S I don't think this "lifestyle" should be classed as "work" at all, they are manipulating the fact that in reality there are so few "real" Dommes out there, they are taking advantage of the sexual desires of some sub men, in this particular case she hasn't even spent any money on setting up so my argument is even more valid.

She's not talking about "lifestyle." Like DS said, OP is upfront that she is not a lifestyle domme and charges for her sessions. No lies, no con. Like it or not it is a legitimate line of work. You do not have to partake, sub men have the choice to pay her to indulge in their desires. There is no taking advantage, no "victim" if both get what they want.

Do you think prostitutes should have to work for free too?

< Message edited by RockaRolla -- 9/13/2014 9:38:57 AM >

(in reply to sexstarvedcuck)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/13/2014 10:17:21 AM

Posts: 985
Joined: 4/11/2012
From: Toronto, Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RockaRolla

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexstarvedcuck

No D.S I don't think this "lifestyle" should be classed as "work" at all, they are manipulating the fact that in reality there are so few "real" Dommes out there, they are taking advantage of the sexual desires of some sub men, in this particular case she hasn't even spent any money on setting up so my argument is even more valid.

She's not talking about "lifestyle." Like DS said, OP is upfront that she is not a lifestyle domme and charges for her sessions. No lies, no con. Like it or not it is a legitimate line of work. You do not have to partake, sub men have the choice to pay her to indulge in their desires. There is no taking advantage, no "victim" if both get what they want.

Do you think prostitutes should have to work for free too?

You could say it is a legitimate line of work... You could also say that a contractor who is not licensed, has no business phone number or website, refuses to give references or detailed quotes, and who wants half up front, is in a legitimate line of work... but how comfortable would you be hiring them, and what quality work would you expect, assuming they didn't just run off with the advance???

I think PandoraFoxxx's points are well made.

I also think that, as soon as you expect payment for services you are in the service industry. Your client is your employer, and they have rights just as you do, and one of them is a reasonably detailed understanding of what specific service they are paying for.

I think the OP's explanation of services "Humiliation, sissy play, Role play, Bondage, Orgasm control, wax play, panty hose fetish, Foot fetish, Chastity" is hopelessly vague. Any one of these categories could include a great number of scenes that may or may not be appealing to a customer. If she was serious, her specific approach to these scenes should be more fleshed out on a web site (or wherever) without getting into titillating details on a customer by customer basis, and she could thus avoid the feeling that customers are looking for something for free by asking her directly for more detail.

The OP's approach to her work seems lazy, and that is why I think her complaint is unsupportable.

< Message edited by Bhruic -- 9/13/2014 10:19:05 AM >

_____________________________

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(in reply to RockaRolla)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/13/2014 10:23:46 AM

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexstarvedcuck

No D.S I don't think this "lifestyle" should be classed as "work" at all, they are manipulating the fact that in reality there are so few "real" Dommes out there, they are taking advantage of the sexual desires of some sub men, in this particular case she hasn't even spent any money on setting up so my argument is even more valid.

But you know what, reading your earlier replies plus the fact you viewed my profile I just knew you were going to reply, you keep sucking up to them if you like but I'm speaking the truth, most people on this site know it too.

There's an elephant in the room !!

Why would I suck up to them? I'm a Dominant man, and I have a submissive. There is nothing that Dommes could provide me except conversation. I am simply stating things the way I see them, no ulterior motive at all.

When you say "I'm speaking the truth, most people on this site know it too," you are stating that you have no support whatsoever for your views and simply assert that the majority agrees with you, no proof.

I'm still not following your suggestion that pro Dommes should hang it up and retire. In that case, you would have lots of sub men not getting Dominated at all. What's the benefit of that?

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to sexstarvedcuck)

RE: Pro domme / lifestyle domme etc. - 9/13/2014 1:47:27 PM

Posts: 8
Joined: 9/4/2014
Status: offline

Ok the vagueness is due to the unlimited possibilities within the categories. Yes you are right the there are a lot of scenes within. By me stating I am not going to cyber for FREE and not to ask for additional detail does not mean they can't ask within the categories what the limits are what are up for discussion. It just means its your damn fantasy and if you want ME to indulge you need to set the scene not me. Secondly " I don't think this "lifestyle" should be classed as "work" at all, they are manipulating the fact that in reality there are so few "real" Dommes out there"

In response just because you work for FREE doesn't mean your a TRUE dome...it just means you don't charge. Ok that's fine but to say a dome who charges isn't a TRUE dome is a joke. In addition... No I don't suck, fuck, get eaten out give hand jobs so on or so forth there fore how in the HELL did you draw the conclusion that I am a "whore...work girl etc"

(in reply to DarkSteven)

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