ffffff333
Posts: 18
Joined: 2/3/2017 Status: offline
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quote:
Do you realize how many "Dominants" people tell submissives how to behave if they're really submissive? Usually followed by some demand involving sex, nudity. In fact, I'd say that it's more often employed by people claiming to be D types than S types. Well being bossy is kind of in the job description of dominants, but i hear ya, i try not to judge but i find such behavior really pathetic. quote:
I disagree. In my experience discussing sex, kink and details of a power dynamic led to expectations. Then when I decided that I didn't like that person, they were confused - after all I shared intimate details and then walked away. It led to them being frustrated and me being pressured. (ranting phone calls, one guy who grabbed my arm and wouldn't let go - thankfully someone else made him let go, etc) I do not consider this a proper display of domly behavior, that said for me personally discussing kink (which may or may not be linked directly to sex) would actually put pressure off, the reason i never really found myself in vanilla relationships is that there is all this drama, both sides playing a game of hide and seek with their emotions, in fact before i decided to accept myself for what i am i was wholly ready to give up on the whole thing entirely, it was my hope that in a Ds relationship i can find a partner more willing to discuss things openly without playing mind games, since everyone puts so much emphasis on communication, i would definitely not freak out if someone decided we were not compatible, i would wish them all the best and keep looking. quote:
Second - You shouldn't be in a power dynamic with someone when you haven't discussed their concept of a power dynamic. This seems kinda redundant, isn't it what it is all about in Ds relationships, she tells me her idea of power dynamic and if i like it i make it happen, i am rather flexible myself, can take various forms (and it isn't pretending either, i realized long ao that human mind is very malleable within certain parameters, so i can use this to reshape myself to extent, the real question is is this persons idea of power dynamic within those parameters) but once again,i worry i will not be able to live up to what the majority see as dominant, just because i love to show kindness and compassion every once in awhile, i am actually rather contradictory person, by trade i am vet technician and have great skill with animals, i have a lot of patience and had even had occasions where i was able to tame cats and dogs everyone considered untamable, on the other hand i am a raging sadist with a mean streak, struggle between this two sides of me has caused me some grief in the past.
< Message edited by ffffff333 -- 2/14/2017 12:44:55 PM >
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