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compromise - 4/4/2007 7:21:57 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		Where does compromise begin? Where does it end.? Should you compromise at all?
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 7:32:09 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Reposted:

I get everything I want because I don't settle :)

People settle when they think they can't really get what they want.  I think I've learned that, when it comes to choosing who you spend your life with as an intimate partner, you can get everything you want, and more.

Compromise is a fact of life- compromise means understanding that ideal is not always ideal, that your illusions might not be the best thing for you, and that someone else's immediate needs come before yours to create an ultimately fulfilling relationship together.

Settling however means giving up something important to you, it means not giving yourself what you know you need most.

Settling might be necessary when buying a house- but not for choosing a life partner.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_894447/mpage_1/key_compromise/tm.htm#894642
settling or compromising?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_669767/mpage_1/key_compromise/tm.htm#669815
compromise

http://www.collarchat.com/m_651324/mpage_1/key_compromise/tm.htm#651340
Do you believe that dominance gives one the right to be selfish?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_580838/mpage_1/key_compromise/tm.htm#580878
compromising on the ds or ms dynamic?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_352315/mpage_1/key_compromise/tm.htm#352318
compromise vs settling

http://www.collarchat.com/m_203433/mpage_1/key_compromise/tm.htm#203443
how far would you compromise?

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Dnomyar)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 7:32:11 AM   
MrDiscipline44


Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Where does compromise begin?
When you realise that you'll get a lot more if you give a little bit.
quote:

Where does it end.?
When you see that you can give no more then what you have.
quote:

Should you compromise at all?
Probably. Depends on how lonely you feel.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to Dnomyar)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 7:46:36 AM   
dawntreader


Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline 		LA,
 
  Thanks as always for providing links :-)
 
you expressed my thoughts on this subject quite nicely in one of the thread links you provided:
quote:


Compromise is a fact of life- compromise means understanding that ideal is not always ideal, that your illusions might not be the best thing for you, and that someone else's immediate needs come before yours to create an ultimately fulfilling relationship together.
LA 




_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 8:12:09 AM   
jauntyone


Posts: 543
Joined: 2/27/2007
From: Anchorage Alaska
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Where does compromise begin? Where does it end.? Should you compromise at all?

Greetings
 
Compromise begins with yourself and ends with yourself. If you yourself are willing to compromise, more often than not, your partner recognizes this and does the same for you.
 
I wish you well
 
melissa

(in reply to Dnomyar)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 8:20:10 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		The limits and boudaries of compromise are self defined. Some don't compromise at all or much because to do more is to sell themselves for whatever it is they're compromising for. Others are willing to be happy with what the other person has to give. I'm much more apt to be the second, if I have multiple partners.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to Dnomyar)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 8:21:25 AM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline 		Once you compromise you can never go back to staus quo,So therefore no compromise is offered here..All things should have been worked out in the beginning.Once mid stream its too late to hook the horses to the wagon...bounty

< Message edited by BOUNTYHUNTER -- 4/4/2007 9:06:23 AM >

_____________________________

US going to hell in a hand basket/

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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 8:25:28 AM   
jauntyone


Posts: 543
Joined: 2/27/2007
From: Anchorage Alaska
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BOUNTYHUNTER

Once you compromise you can never go back to staus quo,So therefore no compromise is offered here..All things should have been worked out in the beginning.Once mid strean its too late to hook the horses to the wagon...bounty

Greetings Master Bounty
 
LOL you sound much like Master does  It brings a smile to my face, thank you
 
I wish you and yours well
 
melissa

(in reply to BOUNTYHUNTER)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 8:30:54 AM   
toservez


Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline 		It is about what prices are you willing to pay and understanding what you want, need and settle for.

People in general who rarely compromise are in general are often going to have more accomplishments then others but will also have fewer friends and colleagues as failure to compromise often means running over others. Higher peaks, yes but they typically also have lower valleys. In this life in specific not compromising might mean more lonely nights whether you are dominant or submissive.

Compromise often begins when a goal of someone’s becomes unattainable by the means or ability of that person and they go to plan B. Compromise ends when they accept something as that will work or will make me happy enough. Victim begins when you slide downward from that by force of another person.


_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 9:04:04 AM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline 		TY then he MUST be a good man smiles..BOUNTY

_____________________________

US going to hell in a hand basket/

(in reply to jauntyone)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 9:10:18 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Where does compromise begin? Where does it end.? Should you compromise at all?


the only times this slave was in a relationship where compromise, or settling, was perceived by either party, the relationship ultimately failed.
 
it isn't important to this slave to be in the "right", to negotiate compromise, or to have Master comply with any preferences this slave has, whether it be the wearing of a seat belt, the duration of a flogging, political party affiliation or _________________(fill in the blank).  this slave's personal preferences aren't imposed on Him, through demand, limit or "compromise".

(in reply to Dnomyar)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 9:14:30 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		If you have to work out thing in the begining isnt that compromising?

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 9:18:45 AM   
jauntyone


Posts: 543
Joined: 2/27/2007
From: Anchorage Alaska
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

If you have to work out thing in the begining isnt that compromising?

Greetings Dnomyar
 
I know this was directed to another but I felt compelled to answer. When I first got together with Master, he was very specific in what he wanted in a relationship. He told me straight out that this was how it was and he would not waver, bend, break, or change in any way, shape or form. I thought over what he had said for many months before contacting him again and telling him that I was ready to accept his offer and that in doing so, I accepted his terms.
 
Never once in 4 years has he changed a single thing from the very beginning. Never have I tried to convince him that my way might have been better. In the end, it has worked out better for the two of us because I have learned a GREAT deal from him and his way of doing things.
 
I wish you well
 
melissa

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 9:40:57 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

If you have to work out thing in the begining isnt that compromising?


this slave's personal preferences aren't imposed on Him, through demand, limit or "compromise".  this slave did not approach Master with a list of demands, limits, or things HE would have to compromise in order to for this slave to serve Him.
 
compromise is where both parties settle their differences, putting to rest some sort of dispute---our differences compliment each other and are celebrated, they are not disputed.
 
this slave agreed in the beginning it will be Master's way or the Highway--therefore, there is no need for Him to "compromise" anything, since He is the one calling the shots and since that is the type of relationship this slave desried and signed on for, there is no compromise on her part, either.
 
Hope that helps to clear things up!


(in reply to Dnomyar)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 11:56:39 AM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jauntyone

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

If you have to work out thing in the begining isnt that compromising?

Greetings Dnomyar
 
I know this was directed to another but I felt compelled to answer. When I first got together with Master, he was very specific in what he wanted in a relationship. He told me straight out that this was how it was and he would not waver, bend, break, or change in any way, shape or form. I thought over what he had said for many months before contacting him again and telling him that I was ready to accept his offer and that in doing so, I accepted his terms.
 
Never once in 4 years has he changed a single thing from the very beginning. Never have I tried to convince him that my way might have been better. In the end, it has worked out better for the two of us because I have learned a GREAT deal from him and his way of doing things.
 
I wish you well
 
melissa

This sounds similar to my situation, melissa.   He is who he is, and I could bend to meet him there or not.  I don't feel that anything I have done along the way has been a compromise though.  Submitting to him is just that, and I am happy to meet his requirements.  I do not believe he has compromised for me, either, although I have never asked him if he felt he had.  In another post I said he did, because I was thinking of ways in which he held off or slowed my development in various areas until he felt I was ready for it.  I thought that was compromising his wants for the bigger picture.  But as someone recently pointed out, that was merely reprioritizing.  He didn't give anything up, in fact now he has exactly what he wanted.  One of the things I have always loved about him is his consistency and that he DIDN'T compromise who he is to get what he wants.  I came to rely on that, and appreciate that.



< Message edited by ownedgirlie -- 4/4/2007 11:57:18 AM >

(in reply to jauntyone)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 1:14:12 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		If you never comprimise, you have comprimised anyway because you traded time for the hope of getting what you want.

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 2:49:43 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		Unless you actually get what you want by not compromising.

Compromising is an agreement reached by two/more people. A settling of differences.  If one says he will not change his philosophies, principles, desires, or overall goal, he is not compromising.  He may adjust the means in which to get there.  If time was never a concern, then time has not been compromised.  If I'm willing to wait 10 years for XYZ to happen, even though it would be really cool if it happened now, I have compromised nothing if it happens in 5 years. 

It's an interesting concept, though.  Worth chewing on...

< Message edited by ownedgirlie -- 4/4/2007 2:56:30 PM >

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 3:09:36 PM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline 		"Hmmmm,....should I get a little weenie V.W. car that's good for the planet and gets 50 miles per gallon or,...........the new Cadillac STS?

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
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RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 5:55:51 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Girly,

That is the definition of comprimise.  You didn't comprimise on what you wanted but you did comprimise by choosing not to have a partner.

(in reply to popeye1250)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: compromise - 4/4/2007 9:13:19 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		Michael, maybe it's because I'm nursing a flu here but I'm confused.  I compromised on not having a partner? 

In my example, I was using "I" while thinking of my Master.  There are things he wanted from me but he wasn't concerned about when it happened, so long as we eventually got there.  I still belong to him all the while.  So if we got there in 5 years rather than 10, he still got what he wanted without compromising.  We are still paired, and neither of us chose not to have a partner.  In my example, I wasn't referring to being with someone or not being with someone.  I was referring to reaching a particular point in the relationship.  I'm not trying to argue compromise vs. not compromising; it's an interesting concept to consider.  I just don't see him as a compromising sort, although it may just be that I don't see his perspective.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 20
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