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Practicing switch? - 5/31/2004 11:11:25 PM

rain

Posts: 319
Joined: 4/13/2004
Status: offline

Greetings,

i had the opportunity to play with one who usually serves as a bottom, but topped me!

We are both interested in reversing the roles, but i have no clue what to do on the opposite side of the flogger, (so to speak), and would like some helpful hints before meeting with him again. (He has way more experience, but is frequently on the road).

Suggestions?

~rain~

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RE: Practicing switch? - 6/1/2004 12:01:09 AM

ShadeDiva

Posts: 1005
Joined: 3/31/2004
From: Sacramento, California
Status: offline

Find a top or a dominant that you are BOTH comfy with - and see if they will consider co-topping with you to help you gain more confidence and give pointers.

I LOVE co-topping, the other dominant/top always gives me something to bounce off from from the dominant role - I do this with my S.O., and the energy we are able to cultivate is just awesome. I always learn something new or a different way to see things, and it's just plain fun, besides!

Most bottoms and submissives welcome the opportunity to be the focus of two deliciously evil brains, so why not simply be honest with him, tell him that you aren't feeling very confident due to inexperience and perhaps you could co-top him with another dominant (he might have someone he knows that would be perfect), and you gain their experience and devious knowledge, while feeling you have a safety net so to speak.

I think it's one of the absolute best ways to learn and home your dominant/top skills, and it's just always so fun too, I see it as being a win-win situation.

Then again, I've never had a *bad* experience doing that, so mileage may vary.

~ShadeDiva

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RE: Practicing switch? - 6/1/2004 12:09:53 AM

MistressKiss

Posts: 295
Joined: 1/1/2004
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Have a negotiation talk beforehand and discuss these things. I was lucky enough to have a mentor who talked with me as I was topping him...and we enjoyed honest exploration and even a lot of laughter as he shared what felt good, what hurt (grinsssssssssss) and gave me pointers. It was a super experience for me, so if you are lucky enough to be able to talk and share during, or at least right afterwards, it can be absolutely super for both people. Have fun!

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"I assure you, Your Honor, I don't have to practice...I'm very good at them..."
(The Marquis de Sade at one of his trials for the sexual perversities he practiced)

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RE: Practicing switch? - 6/22/2004 12:16:23 PM

Laura

Posts: 573
Joined: 6/22/2004
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline

I co-topped (online in chat) a few times it was a real charge. I'd love to do it, really. First I need more real experience though. Anything online is a far cry from the reality.

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RE: Practicing switch? - 8/8/2005 4:23:09 PM

arcticpaw

Posts: 2
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: Orangeville area, Ontario
Status: offline

I know how that is.
I'm in a relationship with my Dom, and I've switched with him once. It sorta got me craving it more. I've been a sub for so long, when I was a domme it get's hard for me to basically think up stuff to do. Does that make sense? I WANT to top but I have no experience with it and get's me all self conscious (not a great domme quality I know..)

blah, I dunno how to explain the situation so Imma shut up now.

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RE: Practicing switch? - 8/14/2005 12:41:25 PM

kalstolyn

Posts: 42
Joined: 2/27/2005
From: Edmonton, AB
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: arcticpaw

I know how that is.
I'm in a relationship with my Dom, and I've switched with him once. It sorta got me craving it more. I've been a sub for so long, when I was a domme it get's hard for me to basically think up stuff to do. Does that make sense? I WANT to top but I have no experience with it and get's me all self conscious (not a great domme quality I know..)

blah, I dunno how to explain the situation so Imma shut up now.

I totally understand where you're coming from there. I desperately want to top someone... hehe and he is perfectly willing. but I have no idea what the heck to do. rather embarassing and awkward, but I guess I'll learn.

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RE: Practicing switch? - 8/14/2005 1:43:20 PM

fastlane

Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
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look at my post on ask a submissive/slave I need my subspace you will witness my experience. Good luck

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RE: Practicing switch? - 8/16/2005 3:39:06 AM

NakedOnMyChain

Posts: 2431
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: Indiana
Status: offline

Read, read, read, read, read. Then put what you've read into consensual and safe practice.

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"I ask for so little. Just fear me, love me, do as I say, and I will be your slave."
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