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The Switch Reality - 6/2/2004 10:05:58 AM

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Hello there the Reality of a Switch is this~
Unless You both are into power exchange. {sub/slave/Switch}
Then there would be no need to be collard by one~
exspecially if Your looking for long~term I was collard by a
Switch before I really knew what that meant. So needles to say
, I lost out on a Loving Domme/sub
relationship. Well She did to~

Sincerely, eyesofAslave

quote:

"No I'm not affarid of Who's behind the door~"

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/2/2004 11:10:00 AM

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I apologize, knees2you, but I really am having trouble understanding this post.

Are you saying a situation where two switches meet up? Or a situation where you wanted to Dom/sub a switch?

From my perspective, a switch is emotionally / mentally wired to require time spent on both sides of the flogger. A person wanting to be in a D/s relationship with this person should, in my opinion, make allowances for this and let the other half of this person's reality surface as it needs to. I am not interested in switching myself, so if I am in a relationship with a switch there will have to be some agreement between us so that the switch can play on the other team at times.

I have not had the occaision to co-top, but I find there is a certain attraction to the idea of co-topping with a switch who is submissive to me.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/2/2004 12:41:12 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
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i don't know...
i was collared to a switch couple for almost 2 years. i was never unhappy with it, because they didn't expect me to top. they bottomed to each other, and to other people, but had collared me as a submissive and knew that's what i was and chose to be.

i think it depends on the switches.

(in reply to Sinergy)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/2/2004 4:01:23 PM

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Joined: 1/1/2004
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I think that understanding knees' posts are beside the point sometimes. Just enjoy the ride.

(in reply to Sinergy)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/2/2004 10:37:01 PM

Posts: 1005
Joined: 3/31/2004
From: Sacramento, California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sinergy
I have not had the occaision to co-top, but I find there is a certain attraction to the idea of co-topping with a switch who is submissive to me.

My guy tells me I am an absolute blast to co-top with and to be honest, I really do bounce off his energy the best when we are both opening up to our devious and sadistic selves on some willing soul.

I just flat out get darn right giddy and gleeful LOL.

It's prolly cuz we are so in tune with each other, and there really isn't much need for words between us, it's rather a lot like a dance, we weave in and out and around each other seamlessly, and I think we tend to be quite intense when working in tandem.

*smile* We have been flown out to another state to provide the double birthday beating for a friends birthday celebration as a present from one submissive friend to another (lol and she got her birthday payback the next year for her *kindness* lolol), and they have repaid each other in kind, by gifting the other with a very long and very ... thorough workover via us.

It's just such a blast. We need to do that again soon methinks!

~ShadeDiva

_____________________________

~ShadeDiva
My projects of love:
theFetishForums
HumanFauna
Kinked
DommeWorld

(in reply to Sinergy)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/4/2004 1:57:30 AM

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Ok everybody here is what I meant~
Any new sub Who is sub/slave only,! Should not look for longterm in being collard by a switch. "Not gonna happen"

Sincerely, eyesofAslave~

(in reply to ShadeDiva)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/4/2004 3:41:03 AM

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Joined: 4/26/2004
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quote:

Any new sub Who is sub/slave only,! Should not look for longterm in being collard by a switch. "Not gonna happen"

Thank you for clarifying.

I myself tend to avoid using infinitives. It may happen, but I think the important thing for people to remember is that a switch is NOT a Dominant. They are a switch, and both aspects of their personality need time to come out and play.

(insert my opinion could be wrong caveat here)

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/4/2004 9:08:44 AM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: knees2you

Ok everybody here is what I meant~
Any new sub Who is sub/slave only,! Should not look for longterm in being collard by a switch. "Not gonna happen"

i have to disagree. i thnk that one must negotiate with whomever they decide to be collared by, but that switches are just as viable as "only" dominants. because one -is- a switch, doesn't mean they will switch with everyone.

i think the key is for both parties to have clear excpectations- that is, if a submissive is collared to a switch he/she needs to know that the switch will not expect him/her to top the switch. if a switch chooses to collar an "only" submissive, he/she should know not to excpect the submissive to switch. rather, find another parnter to dominante him/her such that the submissive side of the switch is neither neglected nor forced on someone who would rather not encounter it.

i think if both parties are clear about what they want, it works out fine.

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/4/2004 10:48:40 AM

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Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
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quote:

i think if both parties are clear about what they want, it works out fine.

I would think it depends on the intention of the collar. For some a collar may be a symbol of commitment regardless of whether it was given by a switch or a dominant.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to perverseangelic)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/4/2004 3:52:51 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
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that's how i define it, personally......i figure the same things hold true.

(in reply to proudsub)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/4/2004 6:29:04 PM

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Yes, know Who Your wanting to do play with, and Who You would like to eventualy collar You~ If You do seek fulltime with a Switch it will only be part time~ Some like that though~ In the end if You are not sure ask~

Sincerely, eyesofAslave

(in reply to perverseangelic)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/4/2004 7:42:18 PM

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Joined: 3/31/2004
From: Sacramento, California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: knees2you
If You do seek fulltime with a Switch it will only be part time

Actually I know plenty of switches where that would not only be totally untrue, but inaccurate.

Some switches don't switch anymore, some call themselves switches because they *once* bottomed, some simply do not have the calling to submit or bottom but maybe 6 times in their lives.

To say that they are ONLY part time, would be a a huge generalization and stereotype.

Just because *some* switches NEED to switch, it doesn't mean ALL of us do.

And just because I might momentarily switch into a submissive role with another does NOT mean at ANY point I am submissive around or with someone that is submissive to *me*.

I can be submissive to someone when I mange to let that part free and at the *same exact time* be fully 100% dominant to someone that is submissive to *me*.

In fact we consider ourselves future poly - in time when we do decide we are solid enough with the core foundation to add in other human beings into the mix they will be submissive or bottoms most likely, we don't really need another dominant mind in the power structure mix, lol, and if I am in a submissive state that will NOT mean that I won't imeediately shift gears and be in full dominant mode to the one I control to deal with whatever the dominant needed to deal with.

So I wouldn't feel at any point would a non live in or live in submissive at any time would feel they only had a *part time dominant* while serving me.

JMO.

~ShadeDiva

_____________________________

~ShadeDiva
My projects of love:
theFetishForums
HumanFauna
Kinked
DommeWorld

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/4/2004 10:40:18 PM

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I guess a fulltime single sub with a fulltime single Domme,
Would still have time where he was left alone~~
So either way If it is a Domme or Switch He would be left alone at some point~
If they are not planning on getting collard them selves~ The Switch I mean~

quote:

"No I'm not affraid of Who's behind the door"

(in reply to ShadeDiva)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/5/2004 12:27:00 AM

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Joined: 1/1/2004
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knees you are a pisser. I don't know what you are saying, but you said it well.

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/5/2004 7:04:57 AM

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Estring it's people like You that make my day~
Always good to hear from You~

Sincerely, eyesofAslave

quote:

"No I'm not afraid of Who's behind the door~"

(in reply to Estring)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/5/2004 7:31:08 PM

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Joined: 4/26/2004
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quote:

Some switches don't switch anymore, some call themselves switches because they *once* bottomed, some simply do not have the calling to submit or bottom but maybe 6 times in their lives.

I know a switch from a Dominantly challenged portion of the world who once told me that she is really a submissive who learned how to beat people so she could be involved in the lifestyle.

There are aspects to that statement and the way it was said which still give me goosebumps, although in a good way.

Im not sure a relationship with a switch will be only "part time," since the relationship will be negotiated by both parties. My only caveat would be to not go into a relationship with a switch expecting all the usual submissive parameters you might have floating around in your grey matter to apply.

Of course, I would caveat my caveat saying the death knell of a relationship can be heard in the word "expectations." I personally think things are what they are, not what you expect them to be.

Just my opinion, could be wrong.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/5/2004 9:09:11 PM

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Joined: 3/15/2004
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Sinergy I agree~

Sincerely, eyesofAslave

quote:

'No I'm not afraid of Who's behind the Door~"

(in reply to Sinergy)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/6/2004 5:15:01 AM

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Joined: 1/1/2004
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I am not sure that a person who is not a switch can express the reality of it. I, too, am not quite getting the point or meaning of this post. Are you saying that you missed out on a great Dom/sub relationship because she was a switch? This tells me that you were looking for your needs to be met (which is fine) but perhaps you were not meeting her needs.

Switches are interesting, fun, and perhaps complex personalities. However, I think it takes a switch to really define one. It's sort of like saying chocolate is a great ice cream flavor, or a bad one, never having tasted it.

I may just be feeling scrappy this morning. It's 7 am and I have not been to bed yet...grins

Attachment (1)

_____________________________

"I assure you, Your Honor, I don't have to practice...I'm very good at them..."
(The Marquis de Sade at one of his trials for the sexual perversities he practiced)

(in reply to knees2you)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/6/2004 7:34:05 AM

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Joined: 3/15/2004
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MistressKiss, if I had known What a switch was i would not
asked Her to work with me~, Well actually It was mutual.
I was looking for long term 24/7 and She new that then one day She got collard and left~ I admit maybe all Switches arent like that but I was warned and did not see the whole picture~

Sincerely, eyesofAslave

quote:

"No I'm not afraid of Who's behind the door~"

(in reply to MistressKiss)

RE: The Switch Reality - 6/6/2004 6:52:17 PM

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
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it all sounds good perverseangelic
but I have to disagree with you because
no matter how conditioned a Switch is
to be either or ither the fact is that at
sum point what ever side is dormant
will surface and need to be * out * Ive
exerpianced twice now Switches whom
desired to stay in submissive mode and
swore that their Dominant side was in
check only to have it come out and tempt
Topping from the bottom so the reality in My
experiance is that a Switch no matter what side
is controlling must be accepted for both sides
no matter what side is ruleing at the moment of
concideration or even what the Switch them self
proclaim to desire only to find that even they them
selfs cannot control the Switch in Them selfs which
is the fact for many and I am addressing the Lifestyle
role Switch not sexual or gender Switch.

(in reply to knees2you)

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