RE: Beaten to a pulp?

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Mercurialdame -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/10/2007 6:27:43 PM)
Beaten to a pulp is fine. Absolutely anything is fine as long as its legal, and from with a consentual arrangement. ps. safe word with a gag is obtained by holding something, and dropping it to safe word. pps. I have a profile that ive been running for decades on a site. I re-read it from time to time. I laugh at how often i said 'ill never do that' or 'that's disgusting' only to find myself languishing in such moments with a trusted partner and having a ball. Your limits will be ever changing. Certain things will remain steadfast, but many, will fall by the wayside as you grow in who you are. try not to judge others, just because you are not personally seeking the same experiences.

MasterFireMaam -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/10/2007 10:32:14 PM)
Sounds like to me your projecting your negative feelings and reactions about your father onto a relationship that reminds you of the abuse you endured. Have you aked the Master and then the slave, seperately, how they feel about it and why they're doing it? Bloody asses are nice. Hell, just blood is nice. Master Fire

Celeste43 -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/12/2007 4:50:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Steelonme Another Top who has been pursuing me on AOL for a few years before I met him here on Collarme, is into gags. So there goes any possiblity of using a safeword. Actually you can be gagged and still have a safeword. Most gags don't prevent all noise. I usually have a ballgag in and I can still make a fair bit of sound, just at a lower volume. Three grunts can be used as a safeword. You can hold a bell in your hands and ring it to indicate a problem. You can even have a gesture, for me it's opening and closing my fists rapidly. I indicate there's a problem, he pulls out the gag and I tell him what the problem is; hair in my mouth, cramp, allergies acting up and can't breathe well enough with the gag in - whatever. He rubs out the cramped muscle, puts the gag back in, and we continue.

curvyslavegirl -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/12/2007 4:58:44 PM)
What i hear in your post that screams abuse to me isn't the activity itself. Its the fact that the activity obviously triggers memories of abusive events in your past. I always worry when anyone, regardless of the type of relationship consent, seeks to dabble in areas that could cause long term psychological damage. We're talking about more than just an "ow I don't like it" sort of boundary here.

Steelonme -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/12/2007 8:20:10 PM)
No, I wasnt abused. No, I dont hate my father or mother. I 'm just not into pain. What? you cant like B&D without the S&M?

chellekitty -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/13/2007 3:37:05 PM)
yep, you can be into just one aspect or any combonation there of...you don't even have to be into the play aspect at all...you can just be into the power exchange side of this lifestyle... but, just because he wants to beat someone to a bloody pulp, and he finds people that want to be beaten to a bloody pulp, and when he does it, they both enjoy it, doesn't make either of them bad people...

Steelonme -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/13/2007 8:33:36 PM)
Lets look at this another way... If you are bleeding you are injured. If someone has injured you on purpose they have assaulted you.

earthycouple -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/13/2007 8:38:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Steelonme *Lets look at this another way... If you are bleeding you are injured.* If someone has injured you on purpose they have assaulted you. Um no. I bleed when I donate blood. I bleed when I have a dry nose and then blow it. I bleed when I menstrate. My slave bleeds when I cut him. My slave bleeds (barely) when I stick needles in him and he may bleed when I use a whartenburg on him. He wasn't injured. He wasn't assaulted either. If you are bleeding you are not necessarily injured or assaulted. I suggest you learn that your kink may not be another's and vice versa OP.

Drifa -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/13/2007 9:23:16 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Steelonme Lets look at this another way... If you are bleeding you are injured. If someone has injured you on purpose they have assaulted you. You are getting cranky answers because your responses are giving the impression that your perception - that this level of pain and damage is A Bad Thing - should be everyone else's perception as well. As has been pointed out, many people enjoy being beaten. That's their thing, so if it's not yours, avert your eyes and move forward with finding someone whose kinks align with your own. There is a world of variation available. Just keep looking. What is right for you may not be right for me, or for other posters. Again, why communicating clearly, honestly, and listening carefully are all valuable life skills, both in the forums and while shopping for sexual partners.

Evanesce -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/13/2007 11:26:45 PM)
quote: Lets look at this another way... If you are bleeding you are injured. If someone has injured you on purpose they have assaulted you. Not quite. If I tell someone I'm going to make them bleed, and they eagerly consent to it, and I then proceed to make them bleed - on purpose - I have not assaulted anyone. On the other hand, if the Kaptin rakes His nails down my back and breaks the skin, even if I haven't explicitly consented to it, He has not assaulted me, because that's the nature of our relationship.

dragonslave77 -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/13/2007 11:35:36 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Drifa quote: ORIGINAL: Steelonme Lets look at this another way... If you are bleeding you are injured. If someone has injured you on purpose they have assaulted you. You are getting cranky answers because your responses are giving the impression that your perception - that this level of pain and damage is A Bad Thing - should be everyone else's perception as well. As has been pointed out, many people enjoy being beaten. That's their thing, so if it's not yours, avert your eyes and move forward with finding someone whose kinks align with your own. There is a world of variation available. Just keep looking. What is right for you may not be right for me, or for other posters. Again, why communicating clearly, honestly, and listening carefully are all valuable life skills, both in the forums and while shopping for sexual partners. I agree whole-heartedly. I enjoy being beaten, and have to admit I enjoy it when blood gets drawn as a result of that beating. Never once do I think of it as assault or anything other than pure pleasure. But that's me and what I enjoy. I can think of any number of things in the broad BDSM spectrum I would not enjoy. Kind of what makes this whole wide world of BDSM so interesting and fun.

MISTRESSKUMA -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/14/2007 8:33:52 AM)
Outrageous. I was verbally and physically abused in my marriage. BDSM is nothing like it. It is done in a caring way with safe words that can stop the action when needed. With abuse, the abuser is usually angry and it doesn't stop even with begging and pleading. So much different. Good luck and peace to you.

Steelonme -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/14/2007 5:56:50 PM)
I never said my kink was the right one. I originally asked why a particular person thought it was ok to beat me til I bleed. That it was his right to set MY limits. So I'm somewhat new to this kink. I asked a question. I got answers. Some darn good ones too. Then it changes from helpful answers to analysis of my past by people who do not know me and make assumptions. And if anyone on here lives in New Jersey as I do, you would know that Domestic violence is a big issue here. Cops see blood or bruises and someones going to jail. They dont take consent as a reason. They will say you are trying to protect them. Been there, done that when my ex wife hit me with a cordless phone and fractured my skull. And drew blood yes lol. No, it has nothing to do with my not wanting to get my ass beaten. Rachel

Aine -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/14/2007 6:27:52 PM)
quote: I never said my kink was the right one. I originally asked why a particular person thought it was ok to beat me til I bleed. That it was his right to set MY limits. So I'm somewhat new to this kink. I asked a question. I got answers. Some darn good ones too. Then it changes from helpful answers to analysis of my past by people who do not know me and make assumptions. And if anyone on here lives in New Jersey as I do, you would know that Domestic violence is a big issue here. Cops see blood or bruises and someones going to jail. They dont take consent as a reason. They will say you are trying to protect them. Been there, done that when my ex wife hit me with a cordless phone and fractured my skull. And drew blood yes lol. No, it has nothing to do with my not wanting to get my ass beaten. Rachel quote: Can someone tell me why a certain Master thinks it's ok to beat a sub's ass to a bloody red pulp? He says it's not like any permanent harm or broken bones was done. It's used to break a sub. Kinda sounds like my father. If I got hurt when I was a kid he would say " I didnt feel a thing". What? I'm not allowed to have limits? Check the bold….that’s probably why people are making attempts at analyzing your past without asking first. He may like to draw blood, that’s not your thing, stay away from him. Easy enough. As many have said before me, they love it, as do I, though I’ve not gotten to the point of drawing blood, though I’m sure I wouldn’t mind too much. As long as it was discussed beforehand and agreed upon. quote: Well I have to start off by saying thank you to all for the responses and advice. Yes, I'm rather new to this particular scene. I used to play games with my ex wife who I had the utmost trust in. But now I'm seeking another I can trust and be willing to submit to. No this person has not done this to me yet and from reading your responses I dont think he is the person for me. He wants no limits or he sets the limits. Tells me I'm trying to top from the bottom. And when I say red pulp I'm not kidding. He sent a picture of a girls ass that was so red and bruised and just to the point of laceration it kind of scared me. Another Top who has been pursuing me on AOL for a few years before I met him here on Collarme, is into gags. So there goes any possiblity of using a safeword. If you like that sort of thing good for you but I must have certain limits that must be respected. Again, I’m probably repeating what has been said before…you need to not give two hoots about what others say you should do. Because they have no right to dictate such a thing. If you come across those that don’t match up with what you think you want, then politely pass them by. Don’t dwell on the things that other people say so much if it’s not something that you agree with. quote: No, I wasnt abused. No, I dont hate my father or mother. I 'm just not into pain. What? you cant like B&D without the S&M? Absolutely, there are plenty of people out there that have nothing to do with SM. And if you’re one of them, more power to you, and I’ll repeat myself. Stay away from people who are, if you are so inclined. There’s nothing wrong with telling people straight out that you are not into something, and if they have a problem, to politely tell them to go jump off a bridge if they push you. quote: Lets look at this another way... If you are bleeding you are injured. If someone has injured you on purpose they have assaulted you. I completely disagree. To the outside person, yes, that might be seen as abuse. But to someone into S&M, as long as everything was consented to beforehand, then no, it’s not abuse. I get my ass beat with a paddle on a regular basis and sometimes it leaves marks and bruises. I effin love it. I ask for it, and occasionally I’ll beg for it. I love pain. There are good pains and bad pains, and I’m –very- vocal when it comes to pointing out what is what when we are exploring/playing. If he were to haul off and punch me for no farkin reason one day, then yes, that would be abuse. Punching is not my thing, nor do I think it will ever be. The biggest argument when it comes to S&M is Consent. Consent it absolutely key to successful and pleasurable S&M. And great communication. Which pretty much goes hand in hand with consent. Without good communication, how can you have proper Consent?

laurell3 -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/16/2007 12:50:49 AM)
If you are referring to the concept of assault legally, your definition of assault is too limited, consent is not really relevant for the most part and actually most of what most of us do would be considered assault in most American states. Bodily injury is much less than to a bloody pulp and can be as simple as any marking or interruption of body function. (which isn't to say I don't do it myself or am criticising others for it, I do and I am not), and yes, in most states it is domestic violence under the law, it is violence by people with a familiar or intimate relationship. You should understand that for many our desire for greater intensity increases over time, so what is appalling to you might be another's cup of tea. It's ok for this person to have this desire, if he can find someone that wants to do it that is actually healthy and fully consents. Safe gestures work, the bell is a good idea, or snapping your fingers, I would suggest something that makes noise instead of just movement, it's likely your Dom/memay be focused on other things when you really need him to stop. l

Steelonme -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/16/2007 4:05:20 PM)
Well I asked for answers and I got many thank you all. I asked why does a certain Master think it's ok. And from what I've seen, many like that. I guess thats what makes him feel that way. However when trying to tell him (back and forth from emails)that I had certain limits he refused to accept that telling me he was the Master and would set my limits. Needless to say, I've moved on. This person has no respect for other human beings and seemed to me to be looking for a playtoy, not a devoted sub.

Celeste43 -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/17/2007 9:59:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Steelonme No, I wasnt abused. No, I dont hate my father or mother. I 'm just not into pain. What? you cant like B&D without the S&M? I haven't read your profile. But that's the place to write that you're into bondage and D/s but not M/s nor s&m. Then if someone who is into M/s or s&m writes you and either hasn't read your profile or announces they'll teach you to like it, you then send back thank but no thanks and delete any future emails unread. Just because he gets off on giving hard spankings doesn't make him bad, abusive or insensitive to another. It just means he isn't compatible with you. Just because he wants a slave doesn't mean he's bad, abusive or insensitive, it just means he's not compatible. Be as explicit as possible in your profile as to what you do want and what you don't and you can then screen people better. Personally I don't chat with strangers. If they can't take the time to read my profile and write based on what they read and only if there are obvious areas of compatibility, then they aren't people I would consider for a relationship. I'm in a long term relationship with someone who did read my profile and did seek the same thing I was looking for. But I never saw any reason to waste time on people who I knew from the beginning weren't right for me, even if they were right for someone else.

MistressSassy66 -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/17/2007 12:07:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Steelonme Can someone tell me why a certain Master thinks it's ok to beat a sub's ass to a bloody red pulp? He says it's not like any permanent harm or broken bones was done. It's used to break a sub. Kinda sounds like my father. If I got hurt when I was a kid he would say " I didnt feel a thing". What? I'm not allowed to have limits? Perhaps that certain Masters submissive enjoys getting their ass beat. Perhaps they like My Punk likes to be "broken" but not in the way it sounds. I dont think I have ever not heard a parent at some point say that,not thats its always right,but sometimes they were being silly and fell down and went bump... Anyway...I have plenty of submissives who enjoy a really good ass beating. Whats more are the ones who are into the heavy CBT and I mean heavy CBT,oh how I love them.... For anyone to assume its abuse its depending on what that person thinks abuse is. I learned along time ago...Assumption is the Mother of ALL fuck-ups. For you* an ass beating is wrong,thats cool with Me as long as you dont tell Me I cant do it,in My space, because you think its wrong. *you as in people in general.

instynctive -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/17/2007 12:20:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Steelonme Lets look at this another way... If you are bleeding you are injured. If someone has injured you on purpose they have assaulted you. Actually, that's assault and battery.

Steelonme -> RE: Beaten to a pulp? (9/18/2007 2:57:42 AM)
Yeah Instinctive , I know but didnt want to go too far in my words being new here and all. I have learned a lot about this kinky world we call our own by starting this thread. I learned that some folks like to bleed or draw blood(!!!). Just not my thing . Hmmm as to my profile, yes maybe change it around a bit going to have to revisit that one.

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