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stpaulslaveuser -> This is very important to new users (10/2/2007 12:16:47 PM)
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Old fashioned values Vs being a submissive.
Ok, finding a guy, and doing the kind of sex HE likes doing so long as your in the mood, doesn't make you a submissive or even kinky. It makes you an old fashioned wife/breeding cow like you your boring grandma.
"submitting" yourself to some one, or any one, or to the general public, what ever the case my be, is a gift of yourself, to the person or persons you are submitting yourself to.
At the core of the idea you are basically saying "I am yours to do to whatever you wish, whenever you wish, or nothing at all, with no regard to my opinion of weather or not I like it."
I don't think you have to automatically submit. There can and sometimes is a power struggle. The loser of this struggle usually submits.
If you like to be in situations where you have no control, but don't want to freely give it ever. That's not submission. It's an entirely different fetish, where as you become bound to fulfill your captors wishes either through being bound, or the inability to fight back as a result of pain, or fear. This is called BDSM.
Learn the damn difference.
Liking rough sex doesn't automatically make you submissive.
It doesn't make for good BDSM either.
Neither does getting it up the ass.
Or sucking cock,
or liking it when some one spanks you. These are only fetishes.
You ALL will have much more fun at these things of you know the basic differences. And you won't find yourselves in situations where you don't want to be.
Yes, being a sub means you usually have more than one fetish.
Yes you can be into BDSM and be a sub at the same time. Yes All of these things can and do mix.
Everyone thinks it's easy being a DOM.
I am here to say it's NOT! It's the lead role in role playing or real life and it's very hard!
Every time you find someone new you have to find out what they need, because almost none of them know what they want, or even like. They just think they do.
Also "Slaves" are something entirely different. A slave is someone who embraces the idea of ownership. Someone who thinks of themselves as an object. Either through fear, brainwashing, or who just thinks that way.
A slaves purpose is to reflect the fetishes of whoever claims ownership.
I think wearing a collar reflects this kind of scenario far more than someone just wanting to be handcuffed and spanked by their new lover so they can call themselves kinky or submissive.
Don't come to a kinky website and post a profile and claim you know what your doing unless you do. You will just look stupid. If all you want 9 out of 10 times is to get a sperm reload in your kid popper. And then be mildly kinky the other 1 out of 10 times you get naked in the dark. Go back an post your profile on yahoo personals or friendfinder or something and leave the rest of us harmless professional perverts alone.
stpaulslaveuser
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