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strap on - 10/11/2007 11:15:07 AM

AGRTDOM

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How would you feel about your dom if he had you use a strap-on on him. Would this diminish your apeal to his dominance,

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 11:21:44 AM

Sephy

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Well I can only speak for myself but I have a Dom partner who rather likes me to use a strap-on on him. It makes absolutely no difference to how I see him, he is dom, I am sub we just like to experiment a bit.

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 11:23:39 AM

Babybass

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ohh - i was hoing for tips on how to use a strap-on on your Dom!!!

i think this was discussed before - but personally, no way - would not reduce his dominance!!

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 11:30:23 AM

velvetears

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Depends.... if he wanted me to grab his hair, yank his head back and call him my bitch boy probably.

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 11:32:31 AM

toservez

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The actual event of it would not be that great but would not make me mad, disappointed or sick. I do not think it would do anything over all to diminish his appeal if that is the only thing that I personally equate to something quite submissive that he does.

Being a dominant and being a submissive does not mean at all times not doing things that fall into defined dominant and submissive acts. Now personally for me a strap on anally is quite a submissive act from personal experience so that is how I would relate to it. To me doing something like this would cause me to have to work through it more mentally then let’s say my Master cooking a meal for me if I always do it. It does not though mean that some sacred trust has been broken and if he liked that over time I could learn very easily please him in this fashion could cause me great pleasure.

One event/quirk does or does not make me like someone less, let alone some one I care for diminish my feelings for them.

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 11:57:16 AM

michelleryder

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Beyond a doubt Id find himless dominant.

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 12:10:40 PM

Tigrita

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I'd have to say it would diminish his dominance for me. I associate that orifice with such violation and humiliation (in a good, but not 'pleasant' way as a submissive), I don't think I could detatch that association even if he purely enjoyed it. Primal, animalistic dynamics also play such a role in what makes me tick; the one doing the thrusting is the boss, and the one who's hole it is in is the bitch.

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 3:19:44 PM

Celeste43

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I am ashamed to admit that this would be very difficult for me. I'm having a disconnect between what I know, which is that him wanting to be physically pleasured in this way is no different than him wanting oral sex, or a massage and what I feel, which can best be described as 'squicked'.

I hope to God he never asks this of me, I think it's one of those things that I would do crying the entire time and for some hours afterwards.

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 3:22:13 PM

laurell3

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Absolutely not. I find this no less objectionable than wanting him to stimulate my gspot. Prostate stimulation in men is incredibly enjoyable, why would I deny him that or think he's less because he desires it?
l

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 3:31:25 PM

lonlyrossInNeed

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i would not be confused at all i would sya that is one who knows what he wants

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 3:34:40 PM

marieToo

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AGRTDOM

How would you feel about your dom if he had you use a strap-on on him. Would this diminish your apeal to his dominance,

At first thought, yes it would. But when I think beyond the act itself, it's really no different than any other sexual act that a dominant may want his submissive to perform in order to bring him pleasure.

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 4:00:19 PM

Tigrita

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quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

Absolutely not. I find this no less objectionable than wanting him to stimulate my gspot. Prostate stimulation in men is incredibly enjoyable, why would I deny him that or think he's less because he desires it?
l

To me, fucking with a strap on is very different than just simple stimulation. Context is very important. All the imagery: on his knees, facing away, getting pounded, that all screams the oposite of dominant to me. Now if he told me to lay face up on the ground, and stood over my face and told me to stick a vibrator up his ass, that would be dominating, and achieve the goal of prostate stimulation and also of humiliating me, 'cause that is just how I get with buttholes, mine or other people's.

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 4:28:37 PM

AGRTDOM

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prostrare stimulation is what I would be looking for. I would still be in control because it is what I want and on my terms.

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 4:38:26 PM

DianeB269

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Just bendover and take it like a man....

Diane

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 4:53:14 PM

laurell3

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Tigrita

quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

Absolutely not. I find this no less objectionable than wanting him to stimulate my gspot. Prostate stimulation in men is incredibly enjoyable, why would I deny him that or think he's less because he desires it?
l

To me, fucking with a strap on is very different than just simple stimulation. Context is very important. All the imagery: on his knees, facing away, getting pounded, that all screams the oposite of dominant to me. Now if he told me to lay face up on the ground, and stood over my face and told me to stick a vibrator up his ass, that would be dominating, and achieve the goal of prostate stimulation and also of humiliating me, 'cause that is just how I get with buttholes, mine or other people's.

He doesn't have to face away and he's probably not going to scream if he doesn't normally. As agrtdom stated, it's quite plausible for a man to enjoy submissive type activities and still retain control.

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 5:13:32 PM

Tigrita

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quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

quote:

ORIGINAL: Tigrita

quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

Absolutely not. I find this no less objectionable than wanting him to stimulate my gspot. Prostate stimulation in men is incredibly enjoyable, why would I deny him that or think he's less because he desires it?
l

To me, fucking with a strap on is very different than just simple stimulation. Context is very important. All the imagery: on his knees, facing away, getting pounded, that all screams the oposite of dominant to me. Now if he told me to lay face up on the ground, and stood over my face and told me to stick a vibrator up his ass, that would be dominating, and achieve the goal of prostate stimulation and also of humiliating me, 'cause that is just how I get with buttholes, mine or other people's.

He doesn't have to face away and he's probably not going to scream if he doesn't normally. As agrtdom stated, it's quite plausible for a man to enjoy submissive type activities and still retain control.

That is different from prostate stimulation. If what he desires is submissive type activities, it is perfectly reasonable for that to diminish his dominance in my eyes, I think. The OP asked if this activity would diminish a dom's dominance in his sub's eyes. For me it would. Perhaps if there were some tangible exertion of dominance, like if he could flog somehow to control the pace and such, or get a serious D/s headspace going on somehow, maybe, but it would be really hard to overcome the submissive imagery. I'm not saying impossible, if ther is one thing I've learned it is never say never. But pounding his butthole with a strap on just sounds bassackwards to the dynamic to me, and it is very different from simply desiring prostate stimulation. To me, at face-value, it is switching.

I'm totally not trying to start a boxing match, just wanted to express my opinion.

Cheers

~ J

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~ Tigrita

There is no right path, only the path you take.

Success is making life happen, versus just letting life happen to you.

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RE: strap on - 10/11/2007 8:20:06 PM

toservez

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Tigrita

quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

Absolutely not. I find this no less objectionable than wanting him to stimulate my gspot. Prostate stimulation in men is incredibly enjoyable, why would I deny him that or think he's less because he desires it?
l

To me, fucking with a strap on is very different than just simple stimulation. Context is very important. All the imagery: on his knees, facing away, getting pounded, that all screams the oposite of dominant to me. Now if he told me to lay face up on the ground, and stood over my face and told me to stick a vibrator up his ass, that would be dominating, and achieve the goal of prostate stimulation and also of humiliating me, 'cause that is just how I get with buttholes, mine or other people's.

For me I split the difference between you two.

The act itself been done to me a lot in my life and my brain has always felt it to be very submissive act and in fact when I have had vanilla flings try to get it done to me so I get a little sub feeling going.

So to me no way the first time or two I could not be thrown mentally as I would feel what I always have felt and not just mentally fix it. I just think I would need time to reprogram my thoughts. I just do not think because of my prior experience I could not get instantly to the to make my Master happy space in my mind.

Lin

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RE: strap on - 10/12/2007 5:40:30 AM

Celeste43

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Prostate stimulation can be done with a finger or with something handheld. A strap on has a very different feel to me.

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RE: strap on - 10/12/2007 6:27:19 AM

Impertinent

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When i was younger i was with someone who really loved this and i think maybe his "enthusiasm" (read: endless pestering until i agreed to do it) put me off and has forever made me think of it as something needy or off-putting. I think anal stimulation is in itself not-undominant but strap-ons/but plugs just have such connotations of submissiveness that i don't think i (personally) could get over the psychological hurdle.

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RE: strap on - 10/12/2007 7:59:47 AM

MsLilac

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I’m probably the wrong person to put my opinion forward on this. But I think it comes down to context. I do not see the act of a dom taking a strap from his sub as making him any less dominant, it’s just a sensation he is enjoying, ‘tis all very sensitive and enjoyable down there.

But if he is bringing submissive-like gestures into the scene/act, then I would say he is bottoming (no pun intended), and not necessarily any less dominant all round.

The reason I answer though, is a few responses intrigued me, describing the act as a ‘violation’, or him being bent over reducing his dominant aura. If that is the case, then surely every time a dominant lady wants to be fucked doggy-style that would make her less dominant?

As I say, I feel it’s all down to context, and the ‘place’ you take it.

< Message edited by MsLilac -- 10/12/2007 8:07:57 AM >

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