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RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/8/2008 4:03:57 PM

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From: i'm headed to HIM...
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the situation of anyone walking in wouldn't be an issue, ever...but if my parents found out about my submissiveness and kinks, they'd probably disown me. my mother has a hard time with the fact that i drink coffee and don't go to church every sunday and have "long, unruly hair." ugh.

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RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/8/2008 4:50:56 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Superman42280

What would you do if your family walked in on by accident in the middle of a scene?

The chances of that happen are next to impossible. Parents live several hundred miles away and I've always maintained a distance between us in all aspects of my life. They could find out through a mutual acquaintance but eh....cest le vis.

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RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/9/2008 6:04:13 PM

Posts: 491
Joined: 10/10/2005
From: Upstate, NY
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Well, I've never had the folks walk in on me and a partner, but my father was looking for some luggage in their attic last year while preparing for a trip and he saw a suitcase he didn't recognize. He went through the front pocket where there was a harness ballgag, some restraints and other associated lonl related stuff. The main part with the rest of my toys was locked, i thought i had put the other stuff in the locked compartment.

He didn't address it with me, but after they got back, my mother asked me if the suitcase was mine, to which I said yes. What's funny is when they were gone, one of my goals while I was house sitting was to get that suitcase out of there, I had stored a bunch of stuff there when I moved back to NY and never had a good chance to get it out when they weren't there or people weren't at my place.

That was almost 6 months ago, nothing has changed in our relationship. It hasn't been discussed since my mom addressed it with me. Only thing I wonder is which role they think I take on.

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RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/9/2008 7:33:15 PM

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If my mom and my brothers, or any of my family found out i would be very red in the face, but i wouldnt care in the end, it is my choice, my mom would understand and be ok with it in the long run if she knew the man i was with could provide for me and all that jazz.

(in reply to SlaveBlutarsky)

RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/9/2008 8:11:18 PM

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Joined: 9/29/2007
From: Buffalo
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to be honest i'm pretty sure that they already know. i think the only thing they don't know...wait never mind. they know that i'm poly too. lol. i study sexuality and while i can hide behind some of that, it's hard to explain why you know how to cyber-dominate/be cyber-dominated in such detail and when you come home too bruised to wear a bra it sort of says something...

(in reply to plantlady64)

RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/9/2008 8:39:24 PM

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From: North Carolina
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I don't know what my mom would do, she'd probably try to pretend it never happened. But my grand mother would pick up the nearest 'whipping' object she could find and beat me AND my Dom "...till the white meat shows!" while screaming and yelling obscenities at us.

As for me, I'd be running buck, titty-flapping nekkid down the street screaming and crying for help as I try to escape. I know my grandmother would focus most of her attack on the Dom giving me a chance, lol

< Message edited by NaiveTempest -- 1/9/2008 8:41:40 PM >

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RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/9/2008 8:45:23 PM

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Grandma sounds kinda dangerous:( yet im pretty sure mine would do the same.

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RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/9/2008 9:31:04 PM

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Joined: 1/18/2007
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Greetings,

I am out to my family. I was collared to my ex-husband and had an agreement with my sister in law that if anything ever happened to us, she would 'clean' the house before my mother could find anything.

After splitting with him, and my subsequent return to the lifestyle, I decided it was best just to give my folks a brief overview so that if anything ever came up, they wouldn't be shocked. My mother has seen my photos and she's cool with both my orientation and my choice to be poly. When I pointed out to her the similarities in how she interacts with Dad to how I interact with SJ, she had her first moment of real understanding of my motivations and drives.

well wishes ~ fairer than she

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RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/10/2008 11:20:05 AM

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Joined: 7/17/2007
From: Ohio
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My parents are ultra-conservative, so if they walked in it would be a highly explosive situation. I've told friends that they would probably shoot him and then me on the spot, no hesitation. It's the "let God deal with them" mentality. I wish I could tell them, but they still have issues with the fact that Ian-sama and I have sex regularly. I also have an extremely naive 11 year old sister, who I would most likely never be able to see again if this were to happen. She needs someone in her life that won't try to force her to follow my parent's belief system, so I definately don't want that to happen.

(in reply to fairerthanshe)

RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/10/2008 4:53:49 PM

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Joined: 12/31/2007
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I live on the same property as my family and my mother is CONSTANTLY walking into my house unannounced. As long the front door is unlocked, I have no problem with that. When I'm masturbating, I lock the door. She's been told "locked door means I'm watching porn or masturbating...come back in half an hour." When I'm having intimate company, I TELL her so. "Mom, I'm having a guy friend over...don't come in the house if you don't want to see me nekkid."

As for her finding out that I'm kinky? Ha! She already knows. I'm not ashamed of my sexuality. She's a little on the kinky side herself (though much more vanilla than I am) and she doesn't have a problem with my activities. Seeing as how we see each other every day, it was important to me that she understand what I do, so that she wouldn't freak out when she sees the bruises or finds certain items in my house.

My dad also has a basic understanding and almost never comes into my house unless he's been asked to come fix something...He knows what I do and asked to not hear details, so I respect that.

All these "Oh my god, I'd be so embarrassed" situations are greatly remedied by good communication and honesty. Bottom line: Don't do anything that you're ashamed of the whole world knowing about. If it's worth doing, it's worth being proud of!

(in reply to plantlady64)

RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/10/2008 10:26:27 PM

ownedandcollared

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Heehee. My folks HAVE found out.

When i was first with my Master, i was keeping a diary.

And it was read.

And there was an explosion...

To this day when i say things like "Yeah, I'd like to have my hair short like that, but Mike won't let me" and i get "He doesnt *own* you!"

lol

(in reply to plantlady64)

RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/11/2008 5:26:19 AM

AtlantaMistress

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Joined: 6/14/2007
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no problem...I gave my mom a sub for x-mas - the gift that keeps on giving!

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RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/11/2008 9:48:41 AM

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Joined: 8/29/2006
From: PA
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My mother would drop dead. I think that my father has a clue because a conversation once came up that sent my best friend and I both running out of a room beet red. Plus my dad mentioned that he had looked up the friend's wife on adult friend finder so he knows that at least they are *different*

(in reply to AtlantaMistress)

RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/11/2008 11:54:22 AM

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Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Santa Rosa
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my mom knows im a 'freak' (she says that i must have a platinum pussy to get the guys i do)
she hasnt asked for details, we'll leave it at that.

(in reply to plantlady64)

RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/20/2008 7:37:02 AM

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Joined: 10/11/2007
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My parents don't know. They're pretty (or at least my father nowadays) conservative Christian, heavy stuff with all that paternalistic world view, new earth creationism, and bible is twue word of God (to the letter) kind of thing. It might be a little difficult to explain to them that their son is bdsm lifestyler and polyamorous. Though, I think in the end they'd take it better than I assume. I already had my big fights when I became atheist, so it's not like it's really so far out.

In the end, I think my mom would not have a big problem with it, if she saw I'm happy. My dad, I think he thinks I'm a lost case already, so it might not be a big deal either. Or he might have a heart attack. I can' possible guess their reactions - but then again, they don't have a key to our place and we don't tend to go to their place for overnight visits, because father does not wish to support pre-marital sex.

Younger sister knows. I could tell my brothers, no biggie there, but have no idea how my older sister would react. Will see one day, most likely, though.

(in reply to kuuntuli)

RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/20/2008 7:41:41 AM

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Joined: 1/12/2008
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ask my Mom not to 'just stand there with your mouth open catching flies, hand Master the weally wuff paddle so he can punish me for being a weally, weally bad girl' ..... ;-) .... Then we'd have to call 911 ....

(in reply to Superman42280)

RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/20/2008 7:55:27 AM

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Joined: 11/3/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: tulitukka

My parents don't know. They're pretty (or at least my father nowadays) conservative Christian, heavy stuff with all that paternalistic world view, new earth creationism, and bible is twue word of God (to the letter) kind of thing. It might be a little difficult to explain to them that their son is bdsm lifestyler and polyamorous. Though, I think in the end they'd take it better than I assume. I already had my big fights when I became atheist, so it's not like it's really so far out.

In the end, I think my mom would not have a big problem with it, if she saw I'm happy. My dad, I think he thinks I'm a lost case already, so it might not be a big deal either. Or he might have a heart attack. I can' possible guess their reactions - but then again, they don't have a key to our place and we don't tend to go to their place for overnight visits, because father does not wish to support pre-marital sex.

Younger sister knows. I could tell my brothers, no biggie there, but have no idea how my older sister would react. Will see one day, most likely, though.

I think Tulitukka's father is already pretending that I don't exist, so it really wouldn't affect our lives that much if he knew

(in reply to tulitukka)

RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/20/2008 8:45:08 AM

Posts: 187
Joined: 8/4/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Superman42280
What would you do if your family walked in on by accident in the middle of a scene?

Well, with UM's in the house, scenes are done when appropriate and behind locked doors with in the House already so they would not be able to walk into a private play scene.

With a public play scene, once the inital embrassment was over, the way it was handled would depend on who the person was and how comfortable they were with being in the lifestyle.

Knight's Alandra

edited to add...

My mom was told before christmas about the poly aspect of the House.... her responce was 'duh, i figured that out about a year ago... as long as you are happy and the UM's are okay that is all that matters."

< Message edited by alandraofMists -- 1/20/2008 8:48:55 AM >

(in reply to Superman42280)

RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/20/2008 9:10:35 AM

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Joined: 1/12/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: NaiveTempest

I don't know what my mom would do, she'd probably try to pretend it never happened. But my grand mother would pick up the nearest 'whipping' object she could find and beat me AND my Dom "...till the white meat shows!" while screaming and yelling obscenities at us.

As for me, I'd be running buck, titty-flapping nekkid down the street screaming and crying for help as I try to escape. I know my grandmother would focus most of her attack on the Dom giving me a chance, lol

i would be very worried if my grand mother did this - she's been dead 20 yrs .....

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Louis: Do you think I would let them harm you?
Claudia: No you would not Louis. Danger holds you to me.
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(in reply to NaiveTempest)

RE: What Would You Do If Your Folks Found Out - 1/20/2008 9:44:54 AM

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Mom's eyes like saucers, then beating her breast with one hand while waving the other at the ceiling.....Oy vey esh meir! Why me God, why? WHY? What did I ever do to you that you should do that this to me? You, look at you Mr. wearing -just- a- collar- on- sunday, I thank God your father is dead because this would kill him! I should have used that hairbrush more obviously to avoid such a thing. If I had only known God I'd have whipped it out of him early! [toned down to minimize the actual hysteria]

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